tw oblondes were sittin on a bench in oklahoma trying 2 figure out which was further the moon or flordia and 1 of em says hello can u c flordia from here?
2006-09-12 17:13:04 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
a blonde was tired of being the butt of blonde jokes so she decided to hang herself. she got a rope tied it to a high treelimb put it on and jumped off. about 10 min. later a man walks by and says "what are you doing"
the blonde replies " im hanging myself"
the man asks "then y is the rope around your arm?"
to this the blonde replies "i tried putting it around my neck first but i couldnt breath"
2006-09-12 17:17:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
A Blonde became into caught pink-handed attempting to thieve an eye fixed fixed from an unique rings save. “hear,” mentioned the Blonde, “i comprehend you don’t elect any hassle the two. What do you say I in simple terms purchase the watch and we forget approximately approximately this?” the government agreed and wrote up the revenues slip. The Blonde regarded on the slip and mentioned, “it is somewhat extra beneficial than I meant to spend. are you able to tutor me some thing low value?”
2016-12-12 07:31:58 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
all these jokes are so funny!
#1) A blonde and a brunette decided to rob a bank. They quickly devised a good plan and they put their plan to action. The brunette drove up to the front of the bank that they had decided to rob. She turned to the blonde and asked her, "Now, do you remember what the plan is?" The blonde sighed and replied, "Yeah, yeah, I remember..." The brunette went over the plan once more and let the blonde out to do her stuff. Before the blonde could shut the door, the brunette yelled out, "Be sure to be in and out in no more than 5 minutes!"
The blonde ran inside and the brunette waited in the car... and waited... and waited... and waited... and waited. After waiting for so long in the car, the blonde bursts out of the bank's doors, the alarm blaring loud enough to wake everyone up. The blonde was lugging a bank safe behind her by a rope tied around it. A security guard ran out of the bank, his pants down around his ankles and attempting to reach his gun. The blonde breathed heavily as she tried to put the safe in the car but finally just gave up and dropped the safe behind. She ran into the passenger seat and pulled the door shut, the car already moving. The security guard yelled, "Stop! Stop!" while the pair drove off, leaving the safe with rope tied tightly around it behind.
The brunette frantically asked the blonde, "What the hell happened in there?!?" The blonde was panting and turned to the brunette and choked out, "What do you mean? I followed the plan exactly!" The brunette paused and yelled, "YOU IDIOT! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO TIE UP THE GUARD AND BLOW THE SAFE!"
#2) A girl came skipping home from school one day. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled. "We were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9,10!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" "Yes, it's because you're blonde," her mother replied.
The next day, the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" Yes, pumpkin, it's because you're blonde."
The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!" And she lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of 36Cs. "Very good," said her embarrassed mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" "No... it's because you're 25."
2006-09-12 17:39:49 · answer #3 · answered by >???<Chinita>???< 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
This blonde was tired of being made fun of and decided to color her hair jet black. A few days later, she goes for a drive in the country and comes upon a sheepherder. She walks up and says to him,"If I can tell you how many sheep you have there, can I have one?" The shepherd says"Sure, have at it." She looks around for a couple of minutes and says, "two hundred and thirty five". The sheepherder looks at her and says,"Wow! Okay, go ahead and pick one."
She goes in the pasture and picks up the biggest one she can find and carries it back to her car. The sheepherder looks at her and says "Now, if I can tell you what your REAL hair color is, can I have my dog back??"
2006-09-12 17:37:15 · answer #4 · answered by DFantum 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A blonde is driving down the road, when she sees another blonde sitting in the middle of a field, rowing a boat. The first blonde comes to a screeching halt, and shouts out to the blonde in the boat, "YOU KNOW, IT'S BLONDES LIKE YOU THAT GIVE *ALL* OF US A BAD NAME!! IF I COULD SWIM, I'D COME OUT THERE AND KICK YOUR TAIL!!"
2006-09-12 17:27:39 · answer #5 · answered by crow76308 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
And you're a good sport.
So, what do you call a blonde's skeleton in the closet?
The winner of a game of Hide & Seek.
M
2006-09-12 17:33:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats cute
2006-09-12 18:18:37 · answer #7 · answered by ~♥~ *CHEEKY* ~♥~ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How is this??
A blonde goes into the dry cleaners to have her sweater cleaned. She asks the clerk, “How much?”
He doesn’t hear her correctly and says “Come again?”
She giggles and says “No...it’s just mustard this time.”
2006-09-12 17:36:56 · answer #8 · answered by Pd 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
HA! That's funny. LOL!
2006-09-12 17:28:56 · answer #9 · answered by Harmony 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
helllo
2006-09-12 21:27:45 · answer #10 · answered by Neha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋