how to be good at small talk if you are shy?

Question

how to start a conversation? is it better to talk about urself or ask about the person u r talking to?

Answer 1

Listen to, and find out about THEM first. Small talk will follow.

Answer 2

Hi. I am shy too. I don't like to have to start a conversation. But here are some things I have learned. It is always easier to get someone talking when they are talking about themselves. Or about some subject they are really interested in. Most of the people we know share something in common with us ( like going to the same school). You can always start with a question about this shared interest, and the more you can do that in a way that gets them talking the better. Ask questions that are :opened ended" not dead-ended. Help them start thinking and they will start talking. Above all: don't worry so much! You are as cute as I am (and that's REALLY cute :)

Answer 3

There are some amazing books that give real life tips, not just boring reading. My favorite is "How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships" by Leil Lowndes.

Another good one, but not nearly as good is "The Fine Art of Small Talk: How to Start a Conversation, Keep it Going, Build Networking Skills- and Leave a Positive Impression" by Debra Fine.

I bought both of them on Amazon.com.

Answer 4

:) the more u work on urself, the better u will feel. *trust me*.

so having said that, work on:

1) your appearance: work out. exercise. take care of ur body. take care of ur skin. get new haircut. try on new clothes. buy Flattering, stylish clothes, make u feel good and look good.

2) your mind: study. read more. learn more about current events. find a hobby, and excel at it. the more u KNOW, the easier it will be for you to develop your own ways of thinking, as well as be able to TALK w/ others about it.

3) your relationships: as u build ur confidence in urself, and keep in mind to be Open Minded, Non Judgemental to others..... u will be able to speak out more, talk to ur friends, family members, practice talking about anything and everything u are learning, or find out what they are interested in. the more u practice, the easier it will be for u to do that with Strangers, or friends of friends, and not feel as shy...because remember, 1 & 2, u are already working on ur appearance and your brain, so u don't have as much to be "scared" about.

:) good luck...the more Positive attitude u have (remember, u can Always change something if u make a mistake, u can learn from it, u can always grow, and do something different tomorrow), the more opportunity u will have in ur life. confidence will lead to easier job interviews, class discussions, making friends, getting to know teachers, etc etc.... huge impact on ur life. but getting over ur shyness is the first step, and working on ur confidence will help u become less shy.

Answer 5

The best thing for most people is to have someone who is interested in what they have to say.So being the listener is good. Also people learn more by listening then by talking. On the other hand say what you are wanting to and do not worry too much. I am sure others want to hear what you have to say too. If you do find yourself a bit tongue tied while talking to others just remember to smile.

Answer 6

I ask myself the same question when I try to talk to the guy I have a crush on. But we're both shy, so it's twice as worse.

Answer 7

I recomend talking about quantifying protein-protein interactions using the gel shift assay. There's allways a leading conversation from that into the bedroom.

Answer 8

Ask questions. The answers willl lead to more conversation.

Answer 9

start off with the weather...lol jk. umm try to start off just being friendly and then start asking about their life. only say your own life if that person asks. that way you are not being rude

Answer 10

I would suggest that you just talk to them. Just force yourself to do it.