How do you remember??

Question

I am getting married in June and my fiance's father has passed. I would like to have a setting at the parents table for him and am looking for some ideas. I have seen lots of photo memorial candles, and I do like them but just wanted to check to see if anyone had any better ideas. Thanks!!

Answer 1

While it is a very kind gesture June is still a long way off... By having a place at the table to remember you fiances father it may bring back very sad feelings for his widow and other family members... So be sure this is something his widow would welcome before actually doing it... She may want to remember him but in a less conspicuous manner such as a photograph and display on a small table off to the side rather than at the parents table.. Let her have the final say on where exactly the memorial if any should be located..

A memory candle(s) and a photograph in a gilded frame (on an beautiful table easel) to catch the flickering candle light with a place card with his name along with a few of his personal items (cuff links, ring, etc.) in a masculine jewelry box... would be a fitting memorial for either a side table or on the parents table...

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If it's on a side table select a small round table covered with a colored fabric and white lace... I also suggest a flameless candle as a table off to the side could easily become a fire hazard and some reception halls have a ban on open flames/candles...

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Answer 2

please don't have an open seat at the table for him - it will only upset others and make it a little sad. one of the nicer things i'd seen were pictures. one couple had their parents wedding (grandparents too) around the cake table. the other did a family table with the pictures and even some memorabelia - it was a large dable (set conference style) with slight different centerpieces, chair covers on that table only ( or do a fresh floral bow if all charis are covered) and the parents and immediate family sat at the table it was so nice.
if you're doing a program you might want to put a nice little sentiment there too.
i wouldn't make a big hoop-de-do about it - your wedding is a celebration.
if you know his favorite song -- dance to it.
if he has a hankey or cufflinks or othe item of his dad's - have him use it/wear it for the wedding. it's not only women who can do the something old something new : )

Answer 3

You dont want to draw too much attention to the fact that he is gone. So I would just include a bunch of family wedding pictures on the table where you would have the guest book. Buy some pretty frames and place a pic of your parents wedding, one of his parents and one of your engagement pics , if you have them. That way his dad is included in the celebration without making it overly morbid. It is a happy time of celebration lets leave the memorial for other times. He wouldnt have want his son being all sad at his wedding because of him.

Answer 4

we didn't do the "open place setting" to avoid other people crying out of sadness. However...we incorporated them into the prayers during the ceremony and laid yellow roses by themsleves in the church for those of us that knew what it was for. You don't want a death to take over your ceremony -- but you don't want to forget people that are imporant in your lives. Please, though, don't leave an open seat -- its almost morbid -- and it might upset people. Check on the rose and prayer idea... Oh, and we put on the back of the program that the program and cermony was "dedicated" to "so and so".... (we also put that if you had restless children, to please take them to the cry room, to turn off all cell phones ... AND we had childrens "quiet bags" ready -- with crayons, coloring book and silent toys. Good luck!

Answer 5

Don't leave an empty seat.. It will make it sad for everyone else who sees it. It's supposed to be a happy day.

My mom died and we are going to have a table with apicture of her and candles.. Simple, but a touching way to feel her there.

Answer 6

My grams died in May, and we are getting married in 3 weeks. We're using her wedding ring, and we're putting a page in our program explaining her role in our lives.

There's nothing wrong with making a memorial. If it's important to you, then do it. I love the idea of leaving a space at the parents' table.

Answer 7

My dad died, and at my wedding, we just had a vase for a single white rose in rememberance of him and a note in the program about him...I don't want to dump your idea, but I wouldn't have set a place for him. It was hard enough to make it through the parent-child dance thing without him... I wouldn't want to have to look at that chair and remember everything that he missed.

Answer 8

I have seen nice glass vases and cadle holders that say something like "In loving memory"

Check out www.customweddingsolutions.com/giftandacc.html

You can also fill the vase or candle holder with those colored glass tones to match your wedding colors.

Answer 9

A picture of UR future father-in-law, on the chair 2 remind everybody & remember happier times.
Some may find it tactless, but it's what I would do.

Answer 10

I wouldn't choose to leave an empty seat, but it's your wedding. A simple single flower with a note in program that the flower is in memory of "his name" who coulld not be with us today.