She's in one of those "moods" again where she wants to have her hair short, but the last time she did (before she met me) she cried. If I do let her cut it, I'm not going to allow it any shorter than 20 inches. Its about down to her waist now. The fact is that women need to have long hair, but i do understand they need it trimmed now and then.
2006-09-12 10:29:54 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
you should let her cut it. try to convince her to not get too much taken of at once or it will be too big a shock for both of you. you never know....you may end up prefering her new haircut.
2006-09-12 12:45:24 · answer #1 · answered by fifs_c 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Either you're posting this as a joke, or you're an absolute neanderthal. Women get in those 'moods' because they aren't happy with the way they look. Perhaps you don't make her feel good about herself. Ummm....from the sound of it, you probably are pretty controlling which can make a woman freak out completely and want to change everything about themselves.
I went through those phases, too. I would cut my hair, then grow it out, cut it, etc... The last time I cut it short I just hated it.
If the girl feels like cutting her hair, remind her that she hated it the last time she did it, but don't tell her how short she can cut it. It's none of your business. Really.
2006-09-12 10:59:44 · answer #2 · answered by J B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand you think you're protecting her by not "allowing" her to cut her hair if she's had regrets about doing so in the past. But, the fact of the matter is that you don't own her or her body, and if you pretend that you have any more say over her body than to give her a recommendation, you're going to make her resent you and that's just going to lead to other problems. So, you can say "Honey, do you remember how much you hated it and how upset you were the last time you cut your hair," but you can't forbid her to do so unless it's ok for her to dictate your appearance to you, too. If she does it and doesn't like it, then it's her mistake, but it will grow back. If you don't let her, then she'll always be unhappy with it the way it is and your relationship may not be repairable.
Oh, btw, that also means you can't dictate the length of her hair if she does go get it cut. If you really love her and she comes back with a bob, you're going to have to suck it up and pretend you don't hate it, because it shouldn't matter to you what she looks like. But, you can request that the person cutting her hair save it for you. And it's probably ok to ask her not to shave it all off.
Now, I don't understand where you got the idea that women have to have long hair. Women who have hair that long develop long term back and neck problems and much more suseptible to whip lash. Plus, hair that long tends to develop split ends and other problems that make it look dull, ratty and unprofessional. That's not to say that you can't be successful if you're fortunate enough to be able to grow your hair out that long, but that there are certain social stigmas and health problems associated with it, especially if you don't have the patience to take proper care of it.
2006-09-12 10:56:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
The only thing I can think of is that you asked this question as a joke to see how many people you could p!ss off. If that was your intention, good job. If, on the other hand, you were serious, what decade do you think you are living in? My wife may ask me if her hair would look good a certain way, but, I would never dream of telling her how she could or couldn't have it cut.
2006-09-12 14:10:28 · answer #4 · answered by anchorworm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the first poster:
Are you kidding us? "Allow her"? This is the 21st Century, dude. Get with it and get over your obsession with needing to control anyone.
And what's with this "women NEED to have long hair" attitude. Women don't NEED to have long hair, short hair, or any "length" hair. In fact, many women don't look their best in long hair.....or is THIS what you're REALLY hiding...the fact that you don't want your girlfriend to look attractive, thinking someone will "take her from you"! Huh?
We women are too smart anymore for this "possession" business and it's about time you, personally, knew about this fact.
If she feels she made a mistake before, remind her, BUT, let her make her own mind up about her hair, for pete's sake. If she cuts it and regrets it, again, remind her it WILL grow back.
Real love means helping others feel good about themselves, not oppressing them and forcing them to do what we want them to do because we have a problem with our own insecurities.
If we are genuine with others and uplift them, think well of them, and encourage them in good ways....so they feel good about themselves....they will stick by us through thick and thin. If they don't, we never "had them" anyway and nicer people will come to us.
The sooner you give up your stranglehold on your insecurities and your obsessive possessiveness, the sooner you and others will have NORMAL lives.
2006-09-12 11:15:57 · answer #5 · answered by Seneca 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who put you in charge? Girlfriend or wife what makes you the one to "allow" her to do anything? If you have an opinion then ask her if she wants it. It's her hair and she has the right to cut it how she wants. And who are you to say how long her hair should be? She's your girlfriend not your posession. This sounds like she should dump you before it gets dangerous. (if you let her)!
2006-09-12 11:59:50 · answer #6 · answered by pk 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is her own person and doesn't need your permission to do anything. Everytime my husband makes a STUPID comment in that regard I head straight for the nearest Beauty Palor. You want someone with long hair then grow yours out BUT LEAVE HER ALONE!
Long hair my Aunt Rosies corset. I have an idea...build yourself a time machine and transport yourself back to the 10th century..the women in this century don't need you.
2006-09-12 12:45:23 · answer #7 · answered by HistoryMom 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ALLOW????
I have read a few of your questions, and although I agree that a man should wear the pants in the family there is a drawing point.
Do you want a partner or an object to own ??
Be the head of your household but please try some love, understanding and basic kindness along with HONESTY and I assure you she will be putty in your hands.
2006-09-12 16:47:25 · answer #8 · answered by northbaygranny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ALLOW? I don't think you have anything to say about it! If she cuts it and you don't like it, thats your problem. Why do men think they have any control over women. It just makes you a neandrathal not a modern day man.
You are a sick control freak.....
How much do you weigh? Because whatever it is thats the exact same amount of dead weight she needs to lose.
2006-09-12 11:05:16 · answer #9 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What in the hell do you mean ALLOW. If the woman wants to get her hair cut she doesn't need you permission. You can tell her that she can do as she likes , just that she should be prepared for the consequences.
2006-09-12 11:03:03 · answer #10 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Who are you....her keeper. I think you should read your question again "should I allow my girlfriend to cut her hair". You don't own the girl, but I see where your coming from...a girls hair is important to her, try to get her to do it in stages that way it's not too much of a shock (I did it that way and it was easier to get used to)......it's her hair though.
2006-09-12 10:56:40 · answer #11 · answered by aza 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋