Life ???? Can't take much more of this.?

Question

Can't take anymore of this crap?
I'm in debt over my head, every time I make promise or arrange to do something that involves other people something beyond my control happens and I'm, left looking an idiot.
Just tried to pay deposit on a rented house and my credit card bounced because the fraud dept are investigating fraudulent attempts to use it.
I'm trying to do a course to change career & put this behind me but every time I book sessions, house move / split from wife etc etc trash my self confidence and I look stupid.
If it wasn't for my dog I'd just end it now. don't care about letting people down etc wouldn't know.
Just don't know of any way out. Forget this positive thinking crap, you do it...... it works for a bit ....... then something beyond your controll screws it up and you crash down lower than you were before. Don't even know why I'm writing this

Answer 1

I know exactly where you are coming from mate!!! Imagine this, I had to relocate to a different country and started out with nothing but the clothes on my back!! I didnt even have any money!! I was in panic mode the whole trip over on the plane (11 hours!!! so you can only begin to imagine the amazing plans i'd made in that time).

Anyway, in 5 months I'd saved enough to get my own place and bring my son over.......

However, during the 5 months of working and saving like mad, I sat down one day and said That's it!! I have had enough!!

My Dad, who is one of those annoyingly logical people said these few words: ROME WAS NOT BUILT IN A DAY!! I started to growl like an angry cat because he was being so clinically logical BUT right!!

First all, look out for Number 1 (yourself!!) don't offer to help anyone else out in your position at the moment. If they are people that care for you and your well being they wouldnt approach you to help in the first place!!

If its debt collection that is worrying you, just write one letter to each respective person explaining your situation. Most of the time, people are understanding and will give you a reprieve.

And, another thing, you certainly do not come across in your post as 'stupid', far from it!!

THE REASON THAT I AM WRITING THIS RESPONSE TO YOU IS THAT I AM SUFFERING FROM DEPRESSION AND HAVE BEEN FOR TWO YEARS BUT I AM GETTING THERE MATE!! SCREW EVERYONE ELSE AND LOOK AFTER YOU!!!!!

Take care!!

Answer 2

Hey, you're probably writing this because part of you wants support and to know that other people have had a load of shiit to contend with and somehow managed to get thru it to a better place - which may seem hard to believe, but it does happen a lot.

Sounds like you're spinning in on yourself, have started to let go of the stuff in life that set this in motion, but the world has yet to catch up to your changed direction. Ugh. Not at all an easy spot, and a whole lot harder to contend with alone. Yeah, the positive thinking stuff works great IF you're dealing with minor issues or have gained some stable footing. As mundane as this may seem, you're best bet may be to swallow your pride and go talk to a couple professional couselors - one to help square out your finances, and another to help you recognize what's going on inside, ya know, what got you to this place, and why it *seems* impossible to get beyond it. Whatever you do, leave room for more choices later. You're near the bottom, so know that the main direction from this point is up.

Answer 3

Don't give up. Instead of looking at all of this as one big problem look at it one problem at a time. You cannot deal with everything all at once you will drive yourself insane. To start with the debt problems, go see a credit counseller. Look in the yellow pages there are many you can see for free or for very little charge. Let them teach you how to deal with that problem then it is one last thing to worry about. Quit looking at things as you letting people down, you are not always letting people down, sometimes when things screw up it is because people let YOU down. Maybe you and your wife split because of something she did, (but it usually takes 2 to mess up a relationship) but when a relationship ends it usually isn't anyone's fault it just wasn't ment to be. Maybe you were just to different etc. You didn't let her down and if she is telling you you did it is just to make herself feel better. Another thing to consider would be to find yourself a good counseller. Not because you are crazy, just so you have someone to talk to. Quite often if you talk about things out load it helps put them in better order in your mind. Good luck

Answer 4

www.moneymanagement.com

I am almost 50 and it seems it wasn't until the last ten years or so that I got my ship together. Most of the trash in my head is what kept me from doing so: worrying about what others thought, thinking all guys were honest and could be friends, confusion about religion, just all kinds of things. I blamed it on my dad dying young, my mother falling apart, mean boss, back stabbing friends, and on and on. Choose what you will take and choose what you can give. It is that simple.

It took some soul searching and self examination to realize I was doing it to myself. You DO have the power to break free but it will take extreme honesty and determination to do so. Never give up.

Answer 5

Just take it one day at a time. Look at the bright things and humor in life. It will get better it always does. Also find someone to talk to about things it will help, even if it is your dog. And don't worry about looking like an idiot every one is an idiot most of the time in there life.

Answer 6

For the financial part Dave Ramsey is a great resource. For all of life Jesus can help you through that. He's my rock and has never let me down.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11

Answer 7

You know, so many people feeling this way. We all work hard just to fork over our money to the bank or the credit card company. I think mass suicide is a good idea. We should all just quit. Perhaps if everyone just said NO! there would be a change. Who knows?
Anyway........

Answer 8

You have got the answer and it is represented by your dog. Your dog loves you unconditionally and you love your dog. That shows that you care a great deal about another being. All is not lost. Know that you are needed and if you look around you, you will find that the greater world needs you too.

Answer 9

LIFE IS HARD!!!!!!!!! I would seek professional help for your suicidal thinking. Contact consumer credit consuling for your bills-look your local # up in the yellow pages. They will help you get out of debt and file banctruptcy if needed. and they are non-profit. Your writing this ? because evidently you want help-you need to quit feeling sorry for yourself adn get off your @$$ and do what needs to be done. You will get through it if you want to-unless you want to be a sissy@$$ and go through with suicide. But I think your tougher than that or you wouldn't be asking for help.

Answer 10

I may not be going through the same things as you are, but I know the feeling. You should look into getting some anti-depressents to lift your mood and possibly some counseling. Atleast do that for yourself..don't stay feeling that way. :)

I'm looking to do the same for myself, so good luck! <3