have a three year old son he has been living with my parents for last 2 years but they retiered and moved to costa rica few months ago . i live close to my college campus my parents pay for college and books/ rent sometimes still but i live next door to a frat house and live with three guy friends and work. But i feel i dont know my own son his name is dylan and i love him dearly but sometimes dont have a clue what i am doing .
2006-09-12 08:41:54 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
my parents kinda dumped this on me out of the blue.
2006-09-12 08:43:38 · update #1
they are also refusing to give me anymore money than the already do.
2006-09-12 08:44:14 · update #2
how do i even begin to be a parent
2006-09-12 08:45:35 · update #3
i dont party my roomates do
2006-09-12 08:49:52 · update #4
my son lives with me no full time
2006-09-12 09:10:23 · update #5
Why not put him up for adoption or how about actually being a parent to him?
2006-09-12 08:44:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
What you need to do is look for a place of your own away from the college. Because that life is probably what got you pregnant in the first place.
Yeah you said you don't party and that your roommates do but think about it this way. Do you really want your son to wake up in the middle of the night and see some drunken frat boy/girl walking around the house naked.
Your son is old enough to know when something is wrong in his life so you should try to get away from that kind of life or you will be raising a son who doesn't respect anyone or anything.
Your are your sons' mother not your parents and it is your job to raise the child so take some intitiative and get out from under your parents purse. That kind of life isn't teaching you anything and i applaud your parents for finally seeing the light. You do need to GROW UP!
2006-09-12 18:15:38 · answer #2 · answered by katie b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a tough situation, I can say, be grateful that your parents are giving you the opportunity to make a life for yourself by taking care of your son and paying for you to attend College. I was 17 when I had my son, kicked out and working full time, barley finished high school, college was not an option. I worked hard and my son and I made it. So if college is your choice, you can still call, write and visit as much as possible, until you get stable enough to take him back and share life with him. Your not a bad mother for your choices, but just keep focused in school, graduate and make a career for you and your son, then you will both be living a good life with eachother.
Can you transfer schools and live closer to them once they move? Good luck sweetie!
2006-09-12 16:08:06 · answer #3 · answered by Michelle Lynn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a 3 year old son also. My job as his mom is:
1. Love him
2. Feed him (as healthy as I can)
3. Clothe him
4. Keep him safe (from injuries, strangers, bad influences, drunks)
5. Show him how to be responsible by my own example (this means by doing all of the above, he will learn how to be good also)
6. Play with him (crayons, ball, take him for walks, show him trees.....)
You need to realize that he is a helpless little boy and you have to do all of the above in the best way that you can. If you can only manage the first four things at first, that's a good start, but he absolutely needs the others also. Please go to a church or a community center or even the college psychologist and ask for some help and guidance.
You can do this, and he needs you to. Stay Strong
2006-09-12 18:46:12 · answer #4 · answered by veus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first question to you. How old are you?I understand wanting a better life for yourself, and possibly your child. If thats what you want. Secondly, If your parents are rasing your child, then why worry about it. Obviously you have never been taught responsibility. They pay for your school, and whatever else. Then they took your child and they are paying for his every need. I am not trying to be rude, but you really should have put some thought into this while you were pregnant. It sounds to me as if your son, has become your sibling To me theres something wrong with that picture. I know first hand, I have a cousin who had kids and signed her rights over to her mom. So, I do try to be sympathetic, but on the other hand maybe them moving was the best choice for the child here. Best wishes to you and I really hope one day you can get everything together, and have some kind of relationship with your child.
2006-09-12 16:14:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like its time for you to take a reality check and grow up. This child is your son, not your brother for your parents to raise. If its financially possible, the first thing I would do is find a small apartment for the two of you so you can start bonding with your son. Feeding him and bathing him, etc should come naturally, it's basically the same as you only on a smaller scale. You might want to check in with some area agencies on parenting classes. (Where I live the mental health clinic offers them for free every couple of months). Good luck to you and your son---I hope you can bond with him and raise him well. It will be an amazing ride, but hold on for the bumps!
2006-09-12 16:13:15 · answer #6 · answered by missionhtg 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take some parenting classes. Your parents have been raising your son for 2 years and you think they dumped this on you. You should really think about putting your son up for adoption. Apparently your parents don't want to raise him and you don't even know him. If you really love him, you will move away from the frat and the guys and stop partying all the time. Grow up. It may be hard for you, but your son deserves better than that.
2006-09-12 15:48:14 · answer #7 · answered by kat 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
it is hard to be a new mom. While i have sympathy for you, if you knew you werent able to vare for the child yourself you should have out him up for adoption, not stuck your parents with the responsibility. Your only option may be to put school on hold and get a full time job so you dont need your parents money. That or look for a different place to live...next to a frat house is no place for a small child. you should have never expected your parents to take responsibility for the boy...i have 3 kids and have been raising them by myself since they were born...where is the boys father?
2006-09-12 15:50:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to get yourself into some parenting classes immediately. Your son needs you, it's time for you to step up and be his mom. Also, it's not your parent's job to raise your child or pay for your life. You are a grown woman, start acting like it. Find a mom's club or other mom's group so you can talk to other moms. Also, I'm sure there are support groups for single mothers if you don't want to join the mom's clubs. Obviously you're going to have to get a job to support the two of you. You can do this, you have no choice, you have to accept the consequences of your actions.
2006-09-12 15:52:17 · answer #9 · answered by maigen_obx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like you want to or are mature enough to be a parent. The only one that is suffering is that child. You need to do what is best for the child. Give him up for adoption. Let some people that really want to be parents raise him. It was never your parents responsibility to raise this child. They have already raised their family. Love him enough to give him a good home and a good upbringing.
2006-09-12 15:54:01 · answer #10 · answered by Happy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I HAVE A 3 YR OLD AS WELL AND IT'S CALLED BEING A PARENT MOST COLLEGES HAVE A DAY CARE ON CAMPUS
GET OUT AND GET A JOB!!!! IF YOU WANT MORE MONEY
AND COUNT YOUR BLESSING THAT YOU YOU CAN GO TO COLLEGE AND THAT YOU HAVE A HEALTHY CHILD
I CAN'T WORK BECAUSE MY DAUGHTER HAS EPILEPSY AND DAY CARES WON'T TAKE HER I WAS PLANNING ON COLLEGE UN TILL MY DAUGHTER BECAME VERY ILL
SO SHUT UP AND BE A PARENT AND NO I'M NOT ALTO OLDER THAN YOU PROBILLY I'M 24YRS OLD AND NO PARENT EVER REALLY KNOWS WHAT THEY ARE DOING THAT'S THE FUN PART.
2006-09-12 16:06:33 · answer #11 · answered by alew 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋