It’s come to this. Amy has agreed to move back, but only if I give Rory away. Rory, my beloved Great Dane has been with me for over 5 years and is a cherished member of my family. Amy is a smart, sexy lady…though a little controlling. I hate the fact that she has put me in this horrible dilemma. How many other people have to make these kinds of decisions? It would break my heart to give Rory away, and it also saddens me to have no love life. Amy leaves no middle ground…It’s either her or him…her words. So…any advice from anyone? I told her I would think about it for 24 hours and let her now. Rory has been very mean to her and is incredibly jealous.
2006-09-12 05:47:52 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pets ➔ Dogs
Keep RORY! For one you crack me up with his little quirks (really think you guys should have a TV show) for two if Amy really loved you she wouldn't put you in this position. I wouldn't get rid of my dog for any guy. Tell Amy you'll look into trainning for Rory, if thats not enough kick her to the curb and find a girl who loves their dog as much as you love yours. Good Luck
2006-09-12 06:24:07 · answer #1 · answered by Elle 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If this Amy girl cannot accept your dog, which I can assume you've had in your life longer than her, kick her to the curb. Do you really want to be with a woman that made you give up your best friend? There are PLENTY of women out there that would adore being in a relationship with you and accept and love Rory as well. It may hurt now, but if she's making you give up your dog now, what will she want you to do later in your relationship? She's not worth the trouble. Keep your dog, he'll love you no matter what. I can almost bet Rory can sense she's trouble since he's been mean to her. Dogs are good at sensing that sort of thing. Good luck to you though.
2006-09-12 12:56:30 · answer #2 · answered by Lucy_Fir 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it that she doesn't like dogs? Or because Rory has been mean? I think it is natural for a dog to be jelous especially if he has been with you and only you for 5 years. He is just being protective. I was talking to a guy the other day that had a similar situation. This is what he did and he swears it worked.
See if Amy will give this one last try, this is what you do: Don't feed your dog for one day. Have Amy feed Rory by hand, I don't mean have her put all his food in a dish, I mean literally by hand. (also she needs to be the one to give him his water dish, make sure rory sees her fill and give him his water dish). It may take a while for Rory to eat out of Amy's hand, you and her MUST not give in, let the dog go hungry until he is willing to eat out of her hand. Have Amy do this until he comfortably eats out of her hand for atleast two days Then have her and only her feed him by giving him food and water in his dish. If she is willing to do this for a couple weeks you may be able to have both (assuming she likes dogs, just not the way Rory is treating her). It may take more time or less time but it is vitally important that she be the one that feeds him until his attitude towards her changes.
In the wild, the top dog (alpha) says when other, lower class dogs can eat. In his mind her feeding him gives her higher status. I hope this makes sense and I truly hope this works for you as it did my friend. Perhaps you will not have to make this aweful choice. At first I was thinking you should get rid of her, but when you said that Rory was mean, I can understand if she is uncomfortable or scared all the time, where she would have a right to make this ultimatum.Best of luck.
2006-09-12 13:05:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Definitely keep the dog. He only has a few more years, don't ruin the rest of his life because of some wench. Shame on her for putting you in that situation. If she's that jealous of a dog, and gives you an ultimatum, what else is she going to do down the line? If you give in, she'll only make your life worse. You can expect that kind of attitude all the way. You'll always be resentful to her, and you will feel guilty. Another woman will come along, and probably be much better. Dogs/animals are usually pretty good at picking up on "bad" people. I'd trust the dogs instincts, he's only looking out for his #1-you. Women/men come and go, dime a dozen, but a good friend is hard to find.
2006-09-12 13:20:38 · answer #4 · answered by tikitiki 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A friend of mine just went through the same dilemma with her husband and her guide dog, of all things. She ended up returning the dog to the school, but she has resented her husband's jealousy and interfering, which has not made for a very comfortable situation.
The main difference between your situation and hers, though, is the fact that Rory has been allowed to get away with some pretty rotten behavior towards Amy. I suggest consulting RIGHT NOW with a professional trainer about dealing with that problem.
I think if you give up your dog, you're going to end up like my friend -- resentful and angry. On the other paw, if you give up Amy, you'll end up resenting Rory for that. I think you and she need to talk about ways to deal with the dog's behavior, and if she's not agreeable, then there may be a deeper issue on her part for which this is just a cover.
But if push came to shove, I know which one I'd give up first. Nobody is going to "force" me to give up my dog if I don't choose to do so. And it may be that Rory senses something about Amy that you don't know. . .if my dogs don't like someone, I'm suspicious of that person, too. My dogs are usually righter than rain when it comes to character assessment.
Like that old joke goes, "My husband said it was either him or the dog. I'm going to miss him."
2006-09-12 13:13:32 · answer #5 · answered by Wolfeblayde 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you want them both in your life, try a compromise...
She comes with you to get Rory some obedience training. That's a win-win situation for everyone.
I read your other post and that dogs has WAAAYYY too much control over your life.
If you are happy with your dog being in control, than just keep things the way they are. Let Amy find someone else. You don't need two others in your life controlling you, and the dog was there first.
2006-09-12 13:07:08 · answer #6 · answered by searchpup 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This would be my decision, for what it's worth:
Amy: out
Rory: stays
If you get rid of Rory to please Amy you'd just end up resenting her in ways large and small.
What if Amy had a problem with, say, a child you had with another woman? With a member of your family? They're not the same thing but then again they sort of are; you obviously are very attached to Rory in a familial way.
2006-09-12 12:55:39 · answer #7 · answered by DR 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Keep Rory. If Amy really cared about you she would learn to love everything about you...including the dog. And your aren't saying you love Amy anyway, you're saying you would be SADDENED to have no LOVE LIFE. I'll take it you don't love her, and chances are she really feels the same way. Don't ever change who you are or anything about you for someone, if it doesn't work out you wont only be out a girl, but a dog as well.
2006-09-12 12:55:17 · answer #8 · answered by afichick 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Definitely Rory my friend. I've always believed, and through personal experience found to be true, that dogs have an innate sense about qualities in people. If Rory doesn't like your girl, chances are he has a very good reason not to, and eventually you will too, if you stay with her. I say cut your losses now, ditch the dame and keep the dane.
2006-09-12 12:59:05 · answer #9 · answered by Andrew C 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
a little controlling?...If she loved you she would find a way to live with poor Rory. So dump her. Tell her you love her and cherish her but Rory is like a child to you and would she give up a child for you? I would never give up my sweet Tanner for anyone. The love you recieve from Rory can never be made up by another. And if you give up Rory what is next? Think about it.
2006-09-12 12:53:09 · answer #10 · answered by Lovely Lady 27 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋