I meet this guy a few weeks ago and we have been hanging out every night, and then I invited him over one night (I had a B-Day party for my daughter) We had a great time as usual and then when we had some time together alone he proceeds to tell me he needs some time to think about us.. This is sorta strange cause he got a phone call from his X-wife earlier that day and then he tells me that. I am not sure how to take that cause he did tell me he only needs a week to figure things out, But I have this feeling that he won't come back around.. And also what would you do if he bought you something for your B-day, would you take it back to him and not except it or would you keep it??? Would it make me a bad person for returning it???
2006-09-12 05:31:35 · 17 answers · asked by Ms. Daisy_Duke 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
To maintain your dignity, wait for him to get back in touch with you. Don't return any gift because that would just seem like a desperate attempt to see him. If he really cares about you , he'll be back. He sounds like a nice enough person, but maybe he's a bit confused right now and needs some time. If it is meant to be, it will happen for the two of you. I also wouldn't wait by the phone either.. get on with your life. Good luck
2006-09-12 05:37:01 · answer #1 · answered by atomictulip 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either keep it or throw it away. Don't give it back to him because that makes you look defeated. If you throw it away, that would be the coolest thing to do because you basically are telling him that he cannot buy you.
Move on. He's a player who needed "woman energy." A lot of men have dark sides with no control over their energies so they feed off of female energies which oddly makes them even worse.
The ex-wife thing sounds like a con if you want my opinion. There has been a trend in "guy inner circles" that states that women find married guys to be more interesting because they understand women better; so a lot of guys create these false personalities to act out this morbid fantasy.
Quite sick and tasteless if you want my opinion. But then I could be playing you by giving this information.
Us men are cunning when it comes to courtship. On behalf of all males, I apologize that this had to happen to you.
If you want more security, find the man who really loves you. If a guy really loves a woman, he'll be a heck of a catch. Every man has that ability. Even this weirdo you just described. The tough part is finding that exact man who only and exactly loves you only.
2006-09-12 12:38:12 · answer #2 · answered by Tones 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A few weeks is a little early for committment so give him the time he asked for. Maybe he still has some unresolved issues with his ex. Better to deal with them now than to wait and have them pop up later on if you stay together. He was honest with you about needing the time so be patient. If he doesn't come back around you have no choice but to move on.
If you like the gift keep it. There is nothing wrong with that.
2006-09-12 12:37:21 · answer #3 · answered by worldhq101 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, are you in a committed, monogamous relationship? Your opening statement that " I meet this guy a few weeks ago and we have been hanging out every night" sounds like you haven't made any kind of commitment yet. Maybe you are smothering him and he needs some breathing space. Lots of divorcees feel that way when they get started in a new relationship. Trust and commitment take longer to develop in someone who has recently divorced.
As for the present, it was freely given and accepted. Unless it was an engagement ring, there is no expectation that you give it back.
2006-09-12 12:33:16 · answer #4 · answered by Rusty Shackleford 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this was the first time he spent time with ur child and u, them perhaps that intimidated him. If not, then I do think the ex had something to do with it. Regardless of that, let him have his time. You can't force a person to feel as you would like. Also, if he is that wishy washy that he is so easily distracted from ur relationship, perhaps this is a good thing. It show something about his character. As for the gift, keep it. That's why ist's called a gift. Only teenagers return stuff when they "break up". He woudn't of given it to you if he didn't want you to have it.
2006-09-12 12:36:35 · answer #5 · answered by a_911girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not be offensive you only know him for a few weeks like you said. Also he gave you a gift that means it was for you to keep not to give it back. It was better that he ask for time to think about you and him then to lead you on in the wrong way. so you have to give the guy some credit.
2006-09-12 12:42:07 · answer #6 · answered by You Don't Know Me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It was a "Gift" so keep it. He has unresolved issues with his ex and he is skeptical regarding developing a relationship with you and your daughter. Remember that you guys are a package. He can't have one without the other and if he has to take days to consider it then he is not the one for you. Find another don't wast your time. The problem is his not yours.
2006-09-12 12:34:50 · answer #7 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that this man is still interested in his ex wife and is using you to fill a void for now. If it were me I would take that gift back to him and tell him how you feel. Get on with you life and find someone who deserves you more than this man does.
2006-09-12 12:35:23 · answer #8 · answered by shirley e 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you need to give him a little more time to find out his feelings for you . Even if you don't think he will be back I would say it is all right to keep the bd gift.
2006-09-12 12:34:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is really wierd but if I were you I would not wait on any man to figure out if he wants to be with me or not. Exspecialy with a kid. If it takes him a week then you don't mean very much to him apparently. You should find someone who is willing to take on you and your daughter. Thier are lots of great men out there and it usually don't take a week for them to know if they even want to try.
2006-09-12 12:39:58 · answer #10 · answered by Just_Curious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋