How do you be a man?

Question

In a previous question I revealed my affinity for gourmet food and classical music. This revelation was met with answers that in so many words accused me of being overly feminine. So now I must ask. How does a “man” behave? It seems that people rely to heavily on outward appearances. So many of these so-called men are at best inept when it comes to procuring a confident female. Meanwhile I date women who if not for their dedication to intellectual pursuits would fit quite handsomely in Hollywood. It also seems most of the “men” would rather retreat than face a threat. It is my opinion that the modern male is mostly flash and no substance. Admittedly I am perturbed by the fact that many women have bought into the outwardly masculine, internally feminized man. They may advertise their so-called masculinity but their true identity is in question. I on the other hand do not were my penis on my sleeve, I much prefer Prada. So for someone like me, tell me how to go about suppressing my manners and intellect so I can attract you, the brainwashed woman?

In every conflict I have ever encountered 99% of the "men" back down, the other 1% got beat the hell up. Why are "men" such punks?

Answer 1

William C don't worry about it....my significant other is a chef. We probably wouldn't be together today if not for that. He knows foods that I can't even pronounce, and even better he cooks many different things for me. He rarely does "typical guy" things, but he is a good man, he just has other interests. He probably can but doesn't normally change a tire and will call me for the AAA number :) However, he shares my love of reading and is probably the best read man I've ever lived with, and can tell me all kinds of new things from what he reads.

Don't worry somewhere out there a woman is waiting for a man like you. BTW we have been together now for over 10 years.

Answer 2

I think a man who likes gourmet food and classical music is highly dateable! I'm really not giving you a bogus "touchy feely" answer, but the highest mark of a man is his confidence. That's also the sexiest thing a man can put on each day!! If you know what you like and are confident in who you are, that's one mark of being a man. But not all! The rest of it comes from personal responsibility and conducting yourself with integrity. Being a man comes from who you are, not what you do or what you like. Having the right priorities in life and keeping them in balance is a mark of manhood. Little boys are selfish and whine when they don't get what they want. Little boys follow the crowd because they lack the confidence to blaze a trail. And your own trail with food and music is one blazed by many men before you. I don't want a man who I have to be a mommy to. I want a man, not a woman! I so agree with you that women have brainwashed and feminized men. There are some excellent books on the subject. Dabney and Eldridge in particular are my favorites. Eldridge claims that the modern feminization of men has killed their souls, forced them to repress their innate need for adventure, and taught them to be our girlfriends. He further purports that the best men believe they can do now is to be good boys and go through life bored in a glass box. He does not support machismo, and neither do I. But I think you are best sticking with us beautiful intellectual types. We deserve you, and you are the type of man who deserves us. Together, we can go far. Let the bored and brainwashed breed and divorce and be miserable. You be you. It sounds like you're doing a great job.

Answer 3

I don't care or worry about fitting into someone else's sterotype of what a man should be or how he should act. I am what I am and very comfortable in my own skin - its a benefit of having been on the planet awhile. I have a wide variety of tastes in music, art, dance, food, movies etc. and fortunately have shared those things with a beautiful intelligent woman for the last 25 years. I also enjoy the shooting sports, hunting (wild pigs with dogs and a spear is a favorite), baseball - lots of others. I also have not hesitated to get into fist fights when the occasion called for it.
The sexiest part of a woman is her brain.....give up on the ones whose brains have been laundered. I don'tknow how old you are, but I'd begin dating women instead of girls..... Good Luck

Answer 4

"would fit quite handsomely in Hollywood." - boring.

Apparently you're so affected by what other people think of you and your behavior that I would say you're having a maturity/insecurity issue. Who cares what others think. You said you're meeting good women what does it matter? So you're metrosexual which is the new "in thing" these days. Why let it perturb you that there are some women who still like neandrethals?

Some guys wear kilts these days. It seems to be the ongoing fad..yet theyre still masculine in their own ways.

Who cares..its what makes you happy.

Answer 5

I hope that by asking how to go about suppressing your manners was only sarcasm. My man loves to cook and prepare gourmet food and classical music. He loves to have deep conversations about situations that matter. He enjoys the fine things in life.

On the other hand, he has a great "boy" relationship with my son as well. They can have lenghty conversations about burping, farting, snot and other disgusting things.

I love both sides of him and you will find the woman for you who is not brainwashed. She will see in you what I see in him and you will be happy. Don't change who you are or how you act to land a woman.

Answer 6

I agree with you and think this is well said (as another non-phony man). You're better off not acting like the fonz or getting tattoo arm bands.

I will say this, though. Become the best you can be at the most effective martial art you can find, and then you can show everyone what it means to be a real man with class, honor and dignity.

Answer 7

Wow, that was pretty good...

While I also like good food, and can tolerate an excellent piece of music once in a while I tend to "dumb" myself when I come across a "nice piece of a*s*s" that happens to be a few rungs down the Evolutionary Ladder. I tend to study them first, learn a little about what they deem "masculine", and will use it to my advantage. Doesn't mean I don't care about the women, it just gives me time to teach those poor souls that I can be whatever they want me to be. I can be Einstein to their Earl Hickey...

Answer 8

You are classy and intelligent, unlike the egotistic pricks called 'real' men!Dont ever worry about that. You are the modern man and like you said the women you date are hollywood material.So what are you worried about?

Answer 9

I say be yourself...its sounds as if you are interesting and intelligent enough to attract the type of woman you are looking for (not the brainwashed one)! Good luck!

Answer 10

I agree with Pratik.

I do say a real man is someone who treats women (hell, ALL humans and animals) with respect and treats people equally regardless of gender.