Why do parents spoil thier kids?

Question

We all know its a bad thing why do they do it?

Answer 1

Cause we can.

Answer 2

There is a good way and a bad way to spoil our kids. As I have said on here before I am a foster parent and I treat each child the same as I would treat my own. If you teach your kids how to respect others and give them the things they need with a little extra they won't turn out spoiled well not spoiled in a bad way. I have always given my kids everything they have ever wanted from a battery operated 4 x4 to a real car. Yet my kids don't ask for big things or expensive things. They do remember my husband and I on our birthday, Christmas, mother's and Father's day and I get remembered on Valentines they. My kids are not the type that wear the expensive clothing or they don't waste money on stupid things. I just gave my son the minivan I was driving for his 18 th birthday but he has to pay the insurance, gas and maintenance on it. ( I bought a new van) He faithfully gives his dad $100.00 a month for his insurance and he does extra work around the house for gas money now that he is back in school.
Most parents spoil their kids because they want to give them everything they didn't have growing up. I was spoiled in that way and I know how if affects me so I chose not to spoil my kids in that way. Instill values in them and your kids will be fine.

Answer 3

This hits home. I am guilty of spoiling my son rotten. I hate myself for it. He is now 18.

Why did I do it? Couple reasons:
1. I had nothing when I was a kid. I had to go to work when I was 13 and I promised myself my kid would never have to go through that. I didn't intend on spoiling him, but I did think to myself, "Oh how I remember what it was like to want something like that" many times. Sadly, I gave in.
2. I have very little time. My wife is disabled and so I am a fulltime parent, full time homemaker and fulltime care giver. I ended up giving my son WAY too much to make up for my lack of time with him - I guess I did that out of guilt.
3. Its easy to give things now a days. There are so many options and cool things for kids to do. You don't need to force your kids to play with the box or the paper towel tube anymore. "Things" are much less costly than they were years ago.
4. Societal pressure. Most kids in my neighborhood get NEW cars when they turn 16. That one I can not understand (or afford). As a parent, I feel guilty when I see 90% of my son's friends with "things" and I am continually denying them. This one is the lowest on the list, but over time, it wears you down.

At best, you could say I have been an adequate parent. But I know I have given him way too much and it will likely be an issue that will cause him more problems in the future.

Answer 4

I think they do it because they probably never were able to have the things that their kids have today. I dont spoil my son. He is 5 and realizes that he cant have everything and when money is scarce, he might not be able to get it. He understands and he is the only child. He gets rewarded only when he is on his best behavior in school and at home. Parents should love thier kids, not spoil them

Answer 5

I think sometimes parents spoil kids with material possessions because there are other things lacking in their relationship with their children. It is easier for them to buy their kids "stuff" then to spend quality time with them and show them affection in today's busy world....not to mention that television ads put pressure on parents to give kids all the things that their peers at school have....Kids have a way of making their parents feel guilty if they don't yet they appreciate the things less we they get more than kids who are not spoiled......

Answer 6

I think the reason why people spoil there kids because their kids is the only thing they have in their lives so they want to make them happy or they don't want their kids to have the life they had growing up if they had nothing. or to keep them from being bad or that's the only way their kids will listen lol!! other then that i have no clue.!!!

Answer 7

Many times, it's because it's the path of least resistance -- it's HARD to have to say "No" to your children, and to make sure they do the right thing. It's a pain in the butt to have to put your plans on hold, or cut short the family outing you've been planning for weeks, just because the kid is acting up. Being a GOOD parent is a lot of hard work -- but there aren't any rules or qualifications for being a parent (other than two working sets of genitals), and not everyone is up to the task. More's the pity for the rest of us....

Answer 8

spare the rod spoil the child.it's a new day and age.i believe in telling a child not to do it first, then a spanking when they do it the second time. it all stared when the took the discipline out of the schools..i have always heard this. i'm not going to raise my kids like i was.if people will look back on the way they were raised i would bet they didn't have it as bad as they thing.

Answer 9

A lot of times people do it subconsciously to make up for whatever they felt their parents did wrong to them growing up. My Mom was very strict growing up - she was nicknamed 'the Warden" as in a prison warden! We hated her (I know that's a harsh word but that's how we felt then. We love her now of course.) My two sisters spoiled their kids rotten and were the opposite of our mother. Me on the otherhand - I think I am not as mean as our mother was, but at the same time I do spoil my kids a bit, but not like my sisters. I just don't want my kids to hate me the way we hated our mother!

Answer 10

Parents need to give their children a sense of discipline. They need to make sure their children have some sort of character and morality. They need to give their children a sense of the value of work and the cost of worldly goods.

This may not be the same thing as giving their children too much attention or too many toys.

However, parents who don't teach their children discipline may do so for a few reasons:
1) Don't know how
2) Don't try (e.g. lack of willpower)
3) Lost control of their children and don't know how to reestablish their authority

Answer 11

wow i see some of the answers here already and i had to add mine. perhaps as I've seen many times already that those parents who spoil their kids don't know how to give freely of their love so instead they will buy them out of sheer guilt. guilt over the fact they have no time for them guilt over the fact they don't know how to love them. well those parents are also in the group of folks who manipulate not only their children but others around them. they are of the controlling type. hey good question there !