Me and my man have been living together for the past 7 years and have a daughter. He recently lost his job and everyday he says he is going to look for one. I tell him to call me during the day but he doesn't and I don't hear anything from him and he comes home with still no job. I'm getting sick and tired of it I am feeling like I want to leave him. What should I do?
2006-09-12 02:09:23 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yep. Leave him. Easy to say, hard to do. I know.
If he doesn't call you, he's probably doing something he doesn't want you to know about or feels bad about. Drinking, gambling, having an affair, i couldnt tell you. I'm telling you tho if he doesn't have any drive now, he won't ever. He's not 14, he's a man. Done growing. So if he gets another job ever, and loses it..be in for another slump.
I guess you could threaten him, see if that works. If not, ditch the dude!
2006-09-12 02:13:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well these are the hardest times and you guys have a daughter together, think before you act. And remember that times are not easy right now in getting a job. Don't bring him down cause that will cost you later, trust me! Just let him know your there for him but that you need his help cause has he knows it's not easy to do it alone. He will get one girl just relax and give him time. Sh*t and maybe talk with some friends they may know of a place where he can apply too....Just be fair and remember that for the past 7 years his been there and did what he had to do.
2006-09-12 09:17:59 · answer #2 · answered by sour_apple809 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
child please wake up and smell the coffee do you really think he is just out looking for a job the economy is not that bad. See your first problem is you are living with him.STOP IT! There is a saying why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free? Im not saying you are a cow, but im saying if he can get all he wants from you, why should he try to do anything? He can just go and pretend he is looking for a job and then come back and say there's nothing out there. Do not let him do that he is just using you. Dont give your daughter that image that a man doesnt have to do anything and that its acceptable that the woman pick up all the slack. Children imitate what they see. My suggestion is you could do better by yourself. Try it
2006-09-12 09:15:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest. Set a time that he has to have a job by or he has to leave. The key to it is that if you make any sort of ultimatum that you stick with it. Idle threats only allow him to continue to walk all over you.
Since you have a daughter together its very important that you keep her best interest as well. Its not healthy to see the two of you arguing all the time. Nor is it healthy for her to get the idea that its okay for her father not to work. Children are all too often used as pawns in struggling relationships. Do what you need to do to make sure she is happy and healthy.
Follow your heart ... you are the only one that truly knows the situation and what you can deal with.
Best of luck to you.
2006-09-12 09:17:24 · answer #4 · answered by J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit down and talk to him with out being accusing and see what he comes up with and then figure out what to do. He could just be enjoying not working right now and taking a break from it I know my hubby did that for 6 months before he finally found a good job and things are better now.
2006-09-12 09:13:54 · answer #5 · answered by tushpush1966 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him what he's done to find a job that day. If he doesn't seem to be doing much, give him an ultimatum, or if you're already that far gone, go ahead and leave. Don't put up with it for much longer.
2006-09-12 09:14:18 · answer #6 · answered by Chris S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF YOU LOVE HIM, then you can sit with him one day and look for jobs for him and talk to him about it. Be his moral support rather than just expecting becoz he is goin thru a tough phase and this attitude of yours is hurting his ego as well. So just help him and make him feel that he is still loved. It seems as if he has no importance if he has no job!
2006-09-12 09:24:36 · answer #7 · answered by Mooch 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you two really need to talk. don't avoid the issue by taking the easy way out. think about your daughter. it would be traumatic for her if you left. why don't you help your partner in his job search? or show some interest in it. and ask him directly why he doesnt respond to your calls. but TALK. you MUST MUST MUST TALK ABOUT IT. and it would be a shame to throw away 7 years simply because you don't want to face the music.
2006-09-12 09:13:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to get off his *** and get a job or get out!! Dont put up with loafing cause then he will think he never has to get a job. Or stay home one day and take him to everyplace for an application.
2006-09-12 09:11:52 · answer #9 · answered by ru2tipsy2c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit him down and tell him how u feel, after 7 yrs i'm sure he will understand, if he doesn't change than try splitting up 4 a while, tech him a lesson, goodluck.
2006-09-12 09:14:12 · answer #10 · answered by D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋