...and some kid fell when the chain broke and landed on a seagull and squashed it to death. One of my mates squealed on me and now I'm facing charges of cruelty to animals through negligence. What story can I use as my defence?
2006-09-11 23:49:38 · 35 answers · asked by Ms. Roxie 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
Tricky.
Very tricky.
I'm not sure whether you even have a defence here, so we'll have to go straight to what the government usually does when it's on shaky legal ground, i.e. tamper with evidence.
These would be good things to have:
a. Poker-faced seagull who is willing to testify that just 30 minutes before the accident, the deceased had been drinking heavily in a bar and had shrugged off all offers of a cab, squawking: 'Gerroff...whasha hellya mean I'm in no condishum to fly? Givememyfcukignkeysback';
b. Coroner who's willing to pump the body full of neat Jack Daniels (half a bottle should make the point clear enough);
c. White t-shirt, matching the kid's size, with 'I HATE SEEGULS' finger-painted on it in blood (the kid's).
Best of luck.
2006-09-12 02:38:54 · answer #1 · answered by Bowzer 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Learn to write better fiction, because it's highly doubtful it even happened.
Wire cutters cutting through chains on a swing at a playground...I don't think so!
Then, some kid comes along and the chain breaks while he/she's on it and kills a seagull, when the kid lands on it? I don't think so, because if I'm not mistaken those birds usually avoid people and the last place it would be is on the ground where a kid is on the swing.
2006-09-12 00:06:07 · answer #2 · answered by JSalakar 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, what do you know about your mate's activities? If you've got anything on him then he might be persuaded to withdraw his evidence.
Failing that, if you argue that the kid was your intended victim and not the seagull, then a good brief will probably get it down to couple of hours' Community Service on the basis of unpredictable consequence. It might also be a good idea to look around the playground for any notices about dogs on leads and so on, so that you can apportion contributory blame to the seagull behaving recklessly. You'll have a tactical advantage in that case since he can't be called as a witness. Better still, if there's anything in the council bylaws about restrictions on wild animals, then you might find there's no case to answer.
Good luck.
2006-09-12 08:43:01 · answer #3 · answered by Trust Me 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't use a story, take the consequence. just as you were taking the wire clippers and obviously breaking into an area you should not have been, I hope you get fined big enough for you to remember next time a fence is there to keep people out for a reason, not for decoration
2006-09-11 23:58:45 · answer #4 · answered by David Wilson 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think u should tell the truth! Why try cutting the chain in the first place....What if a little kid went on the swings and really hurt themselves........think next time u try to do something like that thing about the consequences first how irresponsible are u and your mates. get a life and grow up. thing you should be taught a lesson.
2006-09-11 23:57:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If this is true and its a big if. Then there is no defence ( you have admitted your guilt in this forum so presumambly you dont want to lie to a court and create further problems for yourself) So in reality all you can do is mitigate your position, again you have to tell the truth but my guess is you are below average intelligence have the courage of a dead rat and parents that are ashamed of you. You get the idea.
2006-09-12 04:09:16 · answer #6 · answered by commentator 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Roxie...they should also do you for Criminal Damage & 'Going prepared to commit an illegal act'.
But the main charge surely must be 'Being a stupid, thoughtless & moronic thug'. A kid could have been seriously hurt, or can't your brain cells calculate to that extent?
I hope that this is a 'spoof' question. I hate to think of anyone so dum being involved in Yahoo Answers! (sic)
2006-09-12 00:06:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im waiting to figure out why one would do something stupid like that to begin with? Is there a reason you justify destroying public property? Do you even care a small kid could have been injured worse?
Suck it up and deal with the consequences, you chose to do the wrong. In regards to your mates.. Karma is a Bi*ch.
2006-09-11 23:56:33 · answer #8 · answered by Irish Girl in Cali 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What about the poor kid you moron, they could have broken their necks??! As for seagulls, they are flying vermin that eat their own babies. They more die the better. I cannot think of a purpose for them. You need a right good clatter round the head as well.
2006-09-12 01:06:21 · answer #9 · answered by rondavous 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pest control.
You were getting rid of vermin (the seagull) in a new innovative way, and while you were at it encouraging younger members of the community (the kid on the swing) to take an interest in ecology by getting them to participate in vermin extermination.
2006-09-12 00:01:00 · answer #10 · answered by sarcasticquotemarks 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋