can a guy change his bad attitude if he says he would change for you?

Question

i am quite religious person. i dont believe in drinking and partyingin club late at nite. but i am interested in this guy and he have the same feeling. he said he would try not to drink or partying in clubs anymore if i accept him to be his girl. And he would change for me. What do you think? could he really change? He said he was that way cause no one support him to change.he was hoping for me to change him for the better.
For now, i decide to see if he change or not. and i told him if he ever drink n out late at nite partying in clubs with girls from now on, i would leave him. would he change for real? or would he do it behind my back? guys, please give your most honest opinions.
tq

Answer 1

People go down bad roads sometimes, it doesn't mean they can't change their way of life. If you believe he truely wants to change, then give him his oppertunity to. Maybe don't start a relationship with him until you're sure though. It's hard to answer a question like this because I know nothing about his history or the type of guy he is. But if he is willing to give up all of that for you, then he seems to be a good guy. Now rather or not he'll fallow through with it, that's something you have to find out on your own! You might just be the person he's been in need of to turn his life around, everyone needs a reason, you should be happy you're his. :] Best wishes!

*Edit.* Keep in mind that big changes happen in small steps. Try not to expect everything to change all at once. And if he slips up, try not to be too hard on him (considering how bad the slip up is, if it's with another girl then be as hard as you please on him lol) but if he simply has a stressful day and has a drink, be easy on him. Old habits are hard to break. Just be there for him, support him, remind him of his reward, and I'm sure things will work out for the best.

Answer 2

if he loves u more than his wild life, then i say this guy is worth it, but u first have 2 c the changes in his life b4 u get together otherwise u wont know if he is just saying it or really means it
but remember, if u r religious as u say and he is not and enjoys living a life full of alcohol and parties, then he has to not only change his lifestyle but also his morals if u really want this relat 2 work, u wont be able 2 last f ur hearts aren't set on the same thing
good luck, i hope it works out 4 the both of u

Answer 3

He will try to change, but honestly I don't think that it will work out very well for a long period of time. I understand that you are religious
but there is nothing wrong to go to a club or drink sometimes. don't try to change him, you can't change someone :(

"he said he would try not to drink or partying in clubs anymore"

Why didn't he say 'I won't' instead of 'I'll try'?

Trust me if all his friends go to clubs and drink and he will stop doing that, he will lose his friends and then he'll blame you for that.

I can tell you from my own experience that people don't change, the guy likes you and he will tell you everything you want to hear...

p.s. if you are religious that means sex after marriage? (tell that to the guy, see how he reacts)

Answer 4

He may stop for a time, but he's only fooling himself at best or lying to you at worst to get you to give him a chance.

He may truly want to change, but he does not need to use a relationship as his crutch, because relationships are unstable, changing creatures, and the only way he's going to give all that life up (if he really wants to) is something outside of himself that will be stable and unchanging.

And you don't need to be involved with him in the first place...if you're quite a religious person, perhaps you've heard "bad company corrupts good morals"? That's not just a saying, that's from scripture: I Corinthians 15:33

Answer 5

Yes a man can change if he is determined and he is willing to make you happy and sacrafice things because he loves you.. before i met my bf he was a party animal, he went clubbin at least 4 times a week, was a cigerette smoker, a weed smoker, a drinker and just stayed out late at night, but since hes with me, he has completely changed, he has never changed for anyone but me... its hard to believe but he doesnt do any of those things anymore, so yes a man can change!

Answer 6

I highly recommend (from experience) that you don't hinge a relationship with a promise of change. He may grow to resent that you are holding the relationship with you over his head. While it is possible, my sister in law changed from her partying ways, its not very likely. It took me 10 years of waiting, and now he is (for the most part) the kind of man I wanted, it was a long wait, I wouldn't recommend it. My sister in law on the other hand, changed w/o my brother making her promise, she just saw that life was better "on the other sided" and stopped her ways, w/o a promise of any relationship.

Answer 7

ya, ya, how many women want to change their men instead of finding the right one. this is the worst scenario ever when u start relationships from trying to fix someone right. usually it starts after several years of marriage. but good luck anyway. hope u re still young and can afford a few years wasted for nothing

Answer 8

If at all someone changes, its for him/herself, not for others. If this guy wants to change it ought to be for reason that he believes in. Habits are like strands of thread making a thick rope. You need to remove it strand by strand. It requires motivation, determination and discipline. If you think YOU could be all the three for this guy to change, you can hope to change him.

Answer 9

Try and imagine this. You reaching down trying to pick up this guy. The odds of you lifting him up are very low, however the odds of him bringing you down, are more realistic. simple laws of physics. I ask you this now, What would you do if he asked you to change your ways for him? Is it worth it in the long run?
once again i repeat, it is possible someone may change his/her ways for whatever reasons. The question is how much it is worth for such person to change.
THE ANSWER LIES WITHIN YOUR HEART, FOLLOW IT!

Answer 10

I agree with conspicuous, you need to see the changes before you agree to be his girlfriend. Men can change but they can also be very good liars to get what they want. Why not look for someone who already behaves in the way you would like?