My marriage is just one month old. My in-laws have heard a rumour that I am a drug addict which I am not. I told them I am ready for any kind of test. But still they have not sent their daughter to my house. Now that they have even asked me to stop talking to her on phone. My wife has confidence in me and believes me. My in-laws are not listening to me at all and they are not listening to any body who says positively about me. They are just listening to who ever says negatively about me. Now they started blaming my parents that they knew this before marriage and purposefully they got me married. I am worried that if they brain wash my wife even she might lose confidence in me.
2006-09-11 17:36:27 · 7 answers · asked by Rams 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Well, Ok.
#1-Where did they get the info if it is bogus?
If the info is bogus and you are being honest, who would benefit from this whole ordeal? Figure it out quickly bud, because this person will ruin everything quickly if you don't act smart.
#2-How old are you that your wife's parents have the right to not let her come to your house?
If you are under age than there isn't much you can do but to take your time and prove to them that you are a good guy. It sucks yes, but that is the way it goes when you are young. You have to earn trust.
#3-Did you used to have an addiction and are now clean?
BE HONEST!
If this is the fact, than just fess up the truth about your past and tell them how and when you got clean. In laws have much a part in your future life and will always be there. It is always best to be honest. If you are dishonest, and they find out, they never trust you again because they fear for their child.
Good luck!
2006-09-11 17:47:29 · answer #1 · answered by designsbyniki 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I need to ask what is your culture? If she is your wife, why would her parents "need" to send her to your house? If she is your wife, she should already be there, shouldn't she? If she wants to be with you, are her parents holding her a prisoner? Is she a legal adult?
I am not sure I understand this question and do need some clarification as to what your cultural standards are for this problem? It may be that you need to consult someone who understands this culture and what can be done about the problem.
I would think that you would just go have a drug screening done and send it to them. Keep a copy for yourself if you feel you need to, as proof that your clean and straight. If they don't accept that then they just don't like you and don't want anything to do with you. But that has no bearing on what YOUR wife wants. If she is legally your wife and of legal age to marry, then the decision is hers and not her parents. If she allows them to tell her what to do, then maybe she isnt ready to be married in the first place. Could be an annulment might be necessary and you find a woman that makes her own decisions and doesn't hide behind or isnt afraid of her parents.
She is your wife, speak to her directly and get your answers from her NOT her parents. If she continues to let them run her business, then she isnt ready to be a wife or life partner to you. She is too immature.
Of course all of this depends on your culture and the rites and ceremony of how a marriage is conducted in your country or culture.
Best of luck to you,
J
2006-09-11 18:00:19 · answer #2 · answered by frankly2u 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's very difficult to change other people's minds, especially in-laws. I will say keep being nice to them and show through your actions that you are not a drug addict. Actions speak louder then words. I would just concentrate on the love and relationship you have with you wife and let the in-laws focus on there own problems. Good luck, as long as your wife believes in you, don't worry. After all you didn't marry them , you married you wonderful, trusting wife. Let it go and move on with your life.
2006-09-11 17:44:06 · answer #3 · answered by Katherine C 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Are you married to a 13-year old? They won't "send" your wife home? They won't "let" your wife talk to you on the phone?
Uh, I hate to break it to you, but unless your parents-in-law are committing a felony by keeping your wife locked up, your wife is making a choice here. She's not home? She's not COMING home. She's a spineless human being who's either getting her parents to cover for her or allowing them to run her life (when she's supposedly old enough to make her own decisions).
2006-09-11 17:48:28 · answer #4 · answered by tagi_65 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should probably sit down and discuss this with your wife.....I believe if she married you....then she should trust and have faith in you. Rumor are Rumors......and honestly, if you had the problem in the past....THE PAST IS THE PAST! It's what you are and do today! You didn't marry your in-laws....you don't have anything to prove to them....it's your wife that you have to communicate with and if she's any kind of a REAL person, she will tell her parents to mind their own business.
2006-09-11 17:46:01 · answer #5 · answered by Bluewillow 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok, I'm going to be harsh. Is your wife and adult? Is she not capable of making her own decisions? Why isn't she with you? I don't think people make decisions like that without reason, so is there something you aren't saying? This scenario doesn't add up.
2006-09-11 17:42:02 · answer #6 · answered by rndyh77 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Cook em some waffels
2006-09-11 17:38:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋