shes 38 im 42. found out today she cheated a few weeks ago w a younger man. she asked me to forgive her. but i don't think i can. i do love her. but i can never look at her the same way again. any advice on dealing w/ the pain. and not beating the other man to a pulp.
2006-09-11 13:30:16 · 29 answers · asked by baileysusamotors 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
well just get over her ad try w/ someone knew ur still young
2006-09-11 13:32:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a girlfriend cheat on me and I truly loved her and she loved me. She got drunk at a party and had sex with a guy who was old and not at all attractive.
I felt much the same way you did. You have a couple of choices.
1. Break up with her.
2. Keep seeing her
3. Take a non-permanent break and see how you feel.
Maybe there is a chance for forgiveness and maybe things can be even better. Give yourself some more time, your feelings are still raw. Don't feel like you need to decide right away.
2006-09-11 13:40:50 · answer #2 · answered by steven 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ya. Dump her. I normally preach that people should be tolerant of one anothers flaws and try to work through them in a serious relationship, but cheating almost always crosses the line where I feel confident in suggesting you simply dump her. She cheated on you with this guy that you know of and chances are she'll do it again. (Good chance she's done it before that you just don't know about.) She's supposed to be the one person you can depend on from day to day. Your rock. She obviously doesn't look at you like this as she had no problem throwing your relationship away just for a little instant gratification (sex). As far as this guy that she had sex with? If he isn't someone in your life and just some guy that randomly had sex with your wife, well then you have to wonder if he really has a beating coming? There's a good chance he didn't even know she was married. Even if he did, it's best that 'you' be the adult in this situation as they clearly aren't. The best revenge you can get against him is to let her go to him. Dump her. Maybe she'll go to him. Then she'll cheat on him and cause him this pain. That's the best revenge you can get against him and the most appropriate way to handle her.
2006-09-11 13:35:38 · answer #3 · answered by Olivia B 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
100,000 years of mate selection has been by the female of the species. Who decides who to be with was apparently made by her. Its a decision which she may now regret. Remember it usually takes 7 years for the roaming itch to take hold, so your seven year aren't so. Maybe you ought to view your chick's event as a personal glimpse , a gift to you of her true character. Maybe you're dealing with a serial sex fiend with delusions of years of porn filed years living in a trailer. Anyhow, you found out at least, that her particular itch time is just over 100+ weeks (2 years) before horizontal bopping others became a distraction and part time hobby doing the tube steak boogie.
She's likely the perfect person in your view, but unless you had been screwing others behind her back, then this is the beginning of the end. Loyalty betrayed means you must move on. Don't look back and check out the others on your list.
Forget the young guy, you're not as tough as you think you are and his 11 minutes of pump and grinding is long gone and over. Remember her time with him is NOT part of your experience, it belongs to her and a lawsuit or jail time is not worth trying to erase something that may not have happened.. I think there is no woman worth going to prison over and most women would say the same about men. Good luck with your future. Why not try your luck with mail -order brides?
2006-09-11 13:50:53 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love her and this is her first and only time, I suggest counseling. You can get past it but it will take time and help. My best friend's husband of close to 25 years walked out on her and shacked up with someone else for six months. He came back and they worked it out seven years ago! It's better than ever and he's a changed man. Decide whether or not you love her enough to work it out. If it isn't, walk away. If it is, do it.
2006-09-11 13:34:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all its not the other mans fault,(if he did'nt rape her). If she made the decison to have sex with another man then its all on her and not him. So lets get that out of the way first. Now as far as this sl*t of a girlfriend you've got, thats another story. As a man I'd hate to sound cheuvanistic or one sided, but i'd say dump that BIYACH ! Its common for a man to cheat, itrs expexcted, its in our nature, and thats just how it is. If a woman cheats, shes used up, no good, soiled, and down right nasty. Sorry to say that but thats just how most men think. I would'nt trust her anymore, but it all comes down to you and how you feel about her and you guys relationship with one another.
Good Luck with the sl*t.
2006-09-11 13:45:36 · answer #6 · answered by ausaramenra2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is such a hard situation. either way u go, breaking up or not, there will be reprecussions. if u cannot trust her and cant forgive her, u gotta give it up. otherwise it is unfair to the BOTH of u. trust is the key factor in the relationship. as for dealing? eat a lot of icecream, watch movies! JUST KIDDING. go out some, and meet a girl who appreciates u for u. and the other guy? hes just a asshole.
2006-09-11 13:34:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Beating the other guy will do no good and why is it his fault? He is more than likely single, it is your girlfriend who is in the wrong here.
I don't know about you but I can't forgive infidelity especially as you'll never be able to trust that she won't do it again.
The hurt is bad I know but you'll never get over it if you are always wondering where she is and what she is doing.
2006-09-11 13:33:03 · answer #8 · answered by sarah071267 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think of you should provide up speaking to her. All this is doing is providing you with wish that she'll want you back. She's hooking up with another guy so needless to say she's no longer attempting to come back jointly each time quickly if she's doing that. Getting over somebody is actual stressful. And rather, in some circumstances you by no skill will completely recover from them. you're probable continuously going to care approximately them and in line with danger each as quickly as in awhile wish you should be jointly. i individually think of you ought thus far around, see what else is accessible. possibly with the help of relationship different females and determining how exciting they're, you will start to work out the why your previous relationship wasnt as stable as you concept it replaced into. relationship different people will finally stress you to circulate on, and in line with danger it will even open up an danger to fall in love lower back.
2016-11-07 03:25:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For me I had to look into myself. (had something like that happen). As for beating the pulp out of the other person, still feel like it now and then but would just make things really bad, take some time and look into yourself. then go with your heart.
2006-09-11 13:39:52 · answer #10 · answered by wildfire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im only 21...and my girlfriend 22 had sex with another guy and same thing as you...asked 4 forgivness..i gave her another chance and still..it happend..once a girl has did that to you there is no way turning back my friend.once done will happen again.
ask her this..when she took off her panties and let the guy fcuk him did she think about you?.....no...she gave you no respect...that is why you shouldnt give her any 2..forget about it..im sure you will find another soul mate 20 times as better
2006-09-11 13:36:22 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋