I am insecure about my masculinity. I go to the gym and lift weight and I practice martial arts etc, but I don't feel like a man. I feel that over the last few years us men have been mad to feel guilty about being masculine and now we are suffering for it. How do I act like man in an era of political correctness?
2006-09-11 12:11:29 · 21 answers · asked by Russell B 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
sounds like someone is overcompensating...
2006-09-11 12:13:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Russell, you were born manly. There is nothing you can do to help being manly. I would have you find a group of people to hang around with where there just isn't a question about it. Find people who love and accept you just the way you already are. Manly, masculine, sensitive, shy, neutral - whatever. You are who you are. God made you Russell. That should be good enough for anyone. You will wrack your brains if you try to please anyone but you. You are the one who matters here, front and center. You are naturally manly, and should leave well enough alone. You will meet people who will accept you just the way you already are, and those are the wonderful folks you should have for your friends. If anyone asks you to act gruff or to jump through hoops of fire, smile and walk in the opposite direction as fast as you can. Look in the mirror and repeat, "Chris said I am just about as manly as I will ever need to be, period." You will say that to yourself in the mirror because that is the truth of the matter. Manly? My gosh. Don't tip-toe. If someone asks your opinion, give it, honestly. If they don't like it or you just the way either of you are, smile and leave. The things men put themselves through to appear to be other than they really are! No need to misrepresent yourself here. Just enjoy life and the manly thing will take care of itself. I will tell you this much: around men who are sure of their own masculinity, no one will be having any trouble with yours. Take good care, now, and have a great week. You are quite manly enough, and probably smart and quick on the uptake and enjoy many things that you haven't even mentioned yet. Anybody doesn't like you just the way you are, tell them good-bye and move right along. Sent to you from someone who accepts people exactly the way they already are. With a hearty handshake and a smile I am Chris in South Portland, Maine, U.S.A. (I am also 63 years old.)
2006-09-11 12:39:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your martial arts training should be a very good start. But if I was to offer any advice it is....
Reduce the amount of television/magazines you watch.
You are right to feel emasculated. The balance of power is moving towards women in the media. The reasons are complicated, but it comes down to the fact the women are more disciplined consumers than men. More of the commercial advertising is aimed at women. To make sure the women watch the adverts, more television programs are made for them. If you watch a lot of television, you are bound to feel as though things are wrong. But it's ony advert land. you've got to ignore that rubbish.
Also, magazines and newpapers are being aimed as women, with lots of gossip (I call gossip mags "female porn").
if you can ignore all this, the bad feelings should reduce.
2006-09-11 13:46:01 · answer #3 · answered by Rich N 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Er...after several years of watching "Will & Grace"; Will going to the gym and lifting weights didn't seem to do anything to make HIM more masculine!
Stop trying to DO to make you feel masculine and just BE who you are!
If it's in there it'll come out - and if it's NOT - then YOU will come out!
JOKING!
Don't stress about how other people perceive you - just BE yourself and everything else will follow naturally!
And NEVER try to 'ACT' - because that is all it will ever be - an 'act'. Allow yourself the luxury of being who you are!
2006-09-11 12:25:03 · answer #4 · answered by franja 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
My mom used to say you don't become a man until you have helped produce a daughter, yes old fashioned and rubbish just like all the political correctness, stop worrying so much over what you think you have to be to prove your manhood and just be the man you want to be, enjoy yourself for been who you are and stop worrying so much, your a man now and will be until you go to meet your maker, good luck.
2006-09-12 02:16:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
#1a "REAL MAN" Always take cares of responsibilties no matter what.
Always respect and know how to treat women.
A real man knows how to protect his wife and kids.
REAL Men are not punks and sissys.
Do not ever be afraid to work or become the bread winner.Thats the problem with alot of men today...they expect the woman to work and pamper them.It was tradional that the man would work and take care of the family
Take care of yourself-Mentally & physically (by going to the gym as you do,and eating healthy,)I read in article that it was very essential that men lift some sort of weights to bulid masculinity..A MASCULINE body and demeano (says alot)r=BOLDNESS AND STREGNTH
Mentally-always have a sound mind in life...if you ever feel stressed by the world .Don't be afraid to retreat from the daily stress...(get away,take vacations and relax)
Good luck on your quest to becoming a man.
2006-09-11 12:14:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
just grow a set and start acting like a man! dress appropriately, speak properly, be responsible not only for yourself but for others and your actions. plan a poker night or get together with the guys to watch a game. your masculinity is what you make of it. but don't forget, being romantic is is part of being a man!
2006-09-11 12:36:23 · answer #7 · answered by bengardner33 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This isn't an issue of masculinity but that of confidence. How do u become more confident in ur own skin? Well, u cud try various self help books (yes, sissy, but whos gonna know? and who cares!) OR u cud try reducing ur anxiety, as u seem very concerned about other peoples perception of u....so maybe Seratone 5-HTP (herbal medicine) might help...
2006-09-11 12:24:01 · answer #8 · answered by ♀ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are a man then how you feel is how a man feels.
Be polite and considerate but stand up for yourself if need be: then everything else will fall into place.
2006-09-11 12:19:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
perhaps you were missing a role model when you were younger but its never to late ,what you must do is find an old film starring a guy you consider manly (John Wayne springs to mind) and when in doubt ask yourself what he would do and follow his lead , pretty soon it'll become second nature , good luck
2006-09-11 12:23:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget societies little boxes and rules it's so easy to fall into thinking you have to be, it often leads to feeling inadequate.
Just be yourself. You're fine, you'll be fine. Working on being comfortable with your own true self is far more fulfilling and worth it than trying to fit with sweeping slots that so many of us aren't part of.
Embrace your true self - contentment and happpiness shall come your way.
2006-09-11 12:20:48 · answer #11 · answered by somesky 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋