I gave birth two months ago and my husband has zero interest in sex. You would think it would be the other way around, with me being really tired from taking care of the baby and doing all the housework but all he does is come home from work, watch TV and zonk out. He claims that he is stressed at work but that never stopped him before. What is going on here?
2006-09-11 10:06:25 · 24 answers · asked by Margarita T 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
After a woman has a child a lot of times the husband or boyfriend start viewing their wife or girlfriend as "my babies mother" instead of my sexy wife or girlfriend.
Having a child is mentally hard on the father as well and he will surely be mentally exhausted. He also may be thinking you aren't 100% back to normal after the birth.
You will have to let him know you are ready. Try to find some time alone and let him know.
2006-09-11 10:10:53 · answer #1 · answered by Trevor B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, did your body change shape? Are you nursing ( which is good)? Are You back on birth control of some sort?
Maybe he is stressed, so you might have to do all the work.
Seduce him just as you would before you were married. Undress in front of him, turn around while doing it. Bend over and flash him a peek from behind, then crawl in bed and lay on top of him, putting a nipple on his lips and entice him to take it.
If this doesnt' work to get him erect, then there is a problem in the relationship. If he gets aroused, then continue to do all the work, and let him just lay there and enjoy it. He may find out what he's missing, and want to participate.
If this doesn't work, you have to suspect he's getting it somewhere else, or he's worried about his job. or, he sees you as a MOM now. He has to get past the idea of sex with a MOM.
2006-09-11 10:16:32 · answer #2 · answered by seeitmiway32 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously you have to talk to him about it?
Was he having sex with you before the birth?
Do you suspect him of having an affair, I mean is it a possibility?
Some men get grossed out when they see the delivery and take awhile to get over it?
Maybe he expected that you were going to get right back into shape and sometimes that is just not possible.
There could be a number of reasons, just ask him?
Also, are you making the first moves and making an effort to turn him on with lingerie or whatever?
He may feel like the baby is getting all the attention and he is put on the back burner for now.
2006-09-11 10:17:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what way did your body change?
is he the vain type?
somtimes the thing w elove changes some and it takes getting use to.A guy could never transform so much so quick as a pregnant woman to a baby cradeling mother Its almost instant,and then hes gota adjust to some one else getting the attention,you or the baby.
Boss him around some,not like hold the baby feed the baby,run him to the store and stuff, give him a reason to be zonked,
2006-09-11 10:16:22 · answer #4 · answered by yellowdog 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just b/c you had the baby doesn't mean he cant have the baby blues also.....talk to him see if you can get someone to watch the baby and go out for a night just the 2 of you.....and if you don't want to leave the baby or you cant....Do something at home together once the baby is asleep....even if its only for a few hours....order take out, take a bubble bath together or just talk do whatever you need to do to communicate to each other....
2006-09-11 10:08:40 · answer #5 · answered by Do I know you? ya right LoL 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have to wonder if he was seeing someone else. Sex usally is the best after a baby because they had to wait so long. Somethings definity not right for a man to not want sex I would find out what is going on. Good luck.
2006-09-11 10:12:39 · answer #6 · answered by Marie 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Get on some birth control. Let him know that sex is for fun and not another baby. That night help his interest.
2006-09-11 10:26:47 · answer #7 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would place bets on the fact that your bubby doesn't want you to get pregnant again. He sees what you went through to delivery baby number one, and he sees how tired you are taking care of the youngster.
My suggestion is to talk to him and tell him what you want. How you feel. It is only through communication that you will have the ability to work through this.
And by the way Congradulations on becoming a mom.
2006-09-11 10:11:06 · answer #8 · answered by mikeae 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maggie, honey try lingerie and spice things up, he has pressures with a new mouth to feed and sometimes men are jealous of all the attention the baby gets
2006-09-11 10:23:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only 2 months? Maybe he's worried about hurting you. You are still healing inside. Talk about it. How is he around the baby?
2006-09-11 14:13:27 · answer #10 · answered by watergirl54 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋