My exhusband who is the abuser has been calling my mom's house and asking her if I'm there. I had told her to not to tell him that I'm living at her house. But every time he calls she gets worried. So, I don't know what to do. Should I move out of her house or stay? I just don't want him to find me and kill me since he had stabbed me already. Help!
2006-09-11 09:55:13 · 20 answers · asked by asianpacificislandlaidbackgirl4u 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Restraining order girl, NOW!! Find your local women's shelter and I am sure they will have info on how to obtain one, otherwise, just contact law enforcement and let them know what is going on and keep a record of every time he calls. Also, get caller ID for your mom, so if she doesn't recognize the number, she doesn't answer.
Most important is keep yourself safe. Move outta your moms and call him from a pay phone and tell him "I don't stay there so stop harassing her".
2006-09-11 10:00:55 · answer #1 · answered by maat13101 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In this type of situation it's best that u get the authorities involved as soon as possible. Ask your mom to see about changing her phone number or better yet, both u and your mom move to a different location because u will never know what people like your ex will do out of retaliation. Go to a shelter if u can't find a new place so readily. Restraining orders don't always work.
2006-09-11 17:44:52 · answer #2 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Restraining order. Once you get it, each and every time he calls, call the police and report it. If he is hauled into jail enough times for it, he might eventually get the picture.
Also, block his calls. Be aware of your surroundings when you are away from home. If you have someplace else to go that he is not aware of, it might help to move there instead, if it isn't too much of a burden for you financially. In a different county or state would be good, if that is an option for you. I have seen this happen many times. Don't underestimate what he is capable of if he has stabbed you. Talk to a lawyer if you are able to and find out if there are any other options for you.
Good luck
2006-09-11 17:12:43 · answer #3 · answered by Slimsmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are steps you need to take to resolve this issue...First get a restraining order against the abuser, which would mean he can not be within a specified amount of feet from you such as 100 ft. or being that he is a physical abuser ask for 500 ft. If you can afford to move out of your mom's house, find somewhere save like your own place...most importantly you MUST NOT give the abuser another opportunity to abuse you if he has a history of abusing you he will continue!!! remember a zebra NEVER changes his stripes!!!!
2006-09-11 17:05:47 · answer #4 · answered by Regina Contreras 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She can have his number blocked if he's calling from the same phone and she can make her phone unreachable from an unknown number. That way if he calls she will know not to pick up anything coming from a number she isn't familiar with. Tell her to tell him to stop calling and if he does not, make a police report. The police can have a tap put on your phone to trace his call. All you have to do is dial a number right after he calls and they will document it as stalking. If you already have a restrainer against him, you don't even need to tell him not to call, just make the report. With his past history, they will pick him up just for calling. Get a surveillance camera for the front of the house (you can get them at department stores for 100.00 or so) in case he drives past so you can document that too. He's a nut case and you are going to have to take the offensive here. You can't wait until he decides to stop, it could be too late honey.
2006-09-11 17:07:25 · answer #5 · answered by justme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you gone to the police, they can help. You can go to court and get an order against him. That way by law he can not contact you or see you. I suggest you do this, also if he already hurt you, you can press charges and put him in jail. There is no reason why you should have to live in the dark because of him.
2006-09-11 16:57:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to find an abuse shelter As Soon As Possible! There are safe houses out there where he can't find you. If you have kids, you can bring them with you. Get to the shelter FIRST, they can help you. Believe me, if he wants to get to you, he will, reguardless of a restraining order. Been there, done that. Good luck, honey.
2006-09-11 17:02:37 · answer #7 · answered by rcrbsll 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you need to go to the prosecuting attorney's office and file a restraining order. It won't cost you a dime and it will barr him from calling your moms house or coming around. If he continues this behavior then the law will take it from there.
2006-09-11 17:02:33 · answer #8 · answered by stephanierudder 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love your mother at all, go to an abused women's shelter NOW! Then work on the No Contact Order. Your mother should file for one, separately. For God's sake, how is he not in jail or treatment? Probably because no one is holding him accountable . . . or they keep running back to him. Fact: Whenever these Sociopaths/Narcissists get away with something, their arrogance escalates and they become more dangerous. They begin to think that they are invincible. You need to be responsible, even though it is uncomfortable. If something happens to your mother because you were not proactive, her blood is on YOUR hands.
2006-09-11 17:12:10 · answer #9 · answered by georgia b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Report this to the police, get a restraining, press charges, do whatever you can involving the legal system of course! If you feel you are putting your family at risk see if the courts can put you somewhere. I don't know this sounds way too serious!
2006-09-11 17:10:29 · answer #10 · answered by faith 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋