I am from a divorced situation and my children have to visit their father once a month. While they are there, they visit with their grandparents too. Both my little ones have told me that they don't like the way grandpa holds them down while wrestling. I have asked him to stop and he still insists on being rough with the children. What can I do legally to keep him from bullying my babies?
2006-09-11 08:16:14 · 20 answers · asked by mominstyle 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Put your request in writing to your ex, cc:ed to Grandpa. Get a written warning about rough play from your Pediatrician and include it with your letter. If the behavior happens one more time, take the children to their doctor to have them checked out and the concern documented. Clearly state in writing to the father, that the children are prohibited from visitation with this grandfather (who sounds like a sadistic bastard!) without you present. If the father continues to include the grandfather, refuse visitation based on the father's endangerment to your children. Immediately request a hearing on the matter of visitation, so that he doesn't file a motion for an order finding contempt, first. Or, just wait it out and see if he threatens a contempt motion. He might go along with your rules without involving the court. If he does, that's kind of an implied "agreement."
And . . . Yes, you CAN get an Ex Parte Restraining Order with documentation (e.g.: Doctor's/CPS/Psychologist's reports or convincing statements) of harm to the children. "Ex Parte" is without notice to the other party, but you better have good reason to use this type of R.O. It will only be in effect until the time the judge makes it permanent (hearing).
I also agree that the situation rings of "weird." Please make sure that your children are not minimizing sexual abuse. Sometimes, children will tell you enough to force a change, but are afraid to give all the details.
Don't make mountains out of molehills, but do fiercely protect your children when it is genuinely necessary.
2006-09-11 08:30:13 · answer #1 · answered by georgia b 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Explain to your ex that the children have mentioned not liking to wrestle so roughly with thier grandfather, ask him to please put a stop to it as the children are not enjoying thier time with thier grandfather due to the rough play.... Give it a couple visits without grilling your children when they return to see if it has been handled...
If it is not handled go to the court house and request a hearing because you believe the childrens safty is in question because the rough wrestling frightens them....
Also teach your children to say no... tell them that they need to talk with thier grandfather and explain that they love him but do not enjoy the rough wrestling... Teaching your children to express themselves even if you have to step in and eliminate the behavior in the end is a good lesson it will teach your children to assert thier views and stand up for themselves... As much as we hate to admit it we can not always be there to protect our children and teaching them early to stand up to bullies themselves will be a lesson well learned...
2006-09-11 08:38:38 · answer #2 · answered by Diane (PFLAG) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd have your ex talk to his dad about that. On the side, this is strictly me because I'm a mixed martial arts fighter, I would teach my kids submission holds that they can adequately execute and force grandpa to tap out. Grandpa will get the message that maybe he's going to get too old for that crap. Again, that's me. I teach my kids that all the time.
2006-09-11 08:23:01 · answer #3 · answered by ntoriano 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd talk to there dad and tell him if he doesn't do something being it's his father then I would recommend supervised visitation if it didn't come to a stop..Your ex should have already said something to his father..But if he won't then I'd ask a lawyer what can be done ..Your their guardian and I would do I what I could to protect them if it mean't not letting them go to there Dad's for a while until something was done to stop it..Tell their Dad he will have to come to your place for a visit maybe then he will say something to his dad..
2006-09-11 08:25:56 · answer #4 · answered by Just Dreamin' 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Warn him once more, if he doesn't stop, then don't let them visit. However rough he is being or not, the kids don't like it so he has to just stop it.
2006-09-11 08:19:24 · answer #5 · answered by kurticus1024 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well this has happened to a friend of mine when she was little. he might just think they can handle it but it depends on their age. And hey where is their dad when grandpa is being to rough?
2006-09-11 08:21:13 · answer #6 · answered by mariah!:) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
regrettably the worries are actual, yet you shouldn’t concern so. in no way enable “concern” paralyze your love and care on your grandkids. shop in ideas this; a baby can typically repeat what you're saying to somebody else, yet they're scarcely ever in a position to inform issues interior an analogous ideas-set in which you spoke something. maximum adults can slightly try this. techniques; a million. It doesn’t harm to “cam twine” a even as with your grand little ones in case you already delight in doing this. this way the day, and time you spend with them is on tape, might want to the day, or time ever come into question. 2. in case you "delight in writing" then log a even as with the youngsters. it is likewise a sturdy thanks to shop song of the circumstances you spend with them. *basically shop a Microsoft be conscious folder titled “grand little ones and grandpa” and every time you've them with the help of, even as it time for them to nap, or go away on the authentic of the day, take your time to "log you adult men day." this also helps convey back the information of the day, and make your reminiscence of the time spent with them relaxing all throughout back. wish this allows & ease your ideas about taking area in the grands
2016-11-26 01:33:24 · answer #7 · answered by crooker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him to stop. As for legal, unless you see eminent harm, you cannot get a restraining order. Only other thing to do would NOT see this grandpa at all with the kids.
2006-09-11 08:19:58 · answer #8 · answered by g m 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
talk to your husband first,then take them to see a social worker.make sure the voice doing the complaining is the kid's and not yours,grandpa should not be wresting the kids anyway.
2006-09-11 08:23:09 · answer #9 · answered by miraclehand2020 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Family Law varies from state to state. To best get an answer that applies in your area I reccomend that you contact an attorney in your area who is qualified to give you this type of advice. Good luck
2006-09-11 08:37:45 · answer #10 · answered by jennypoo803 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋