The other man is a coworker we known each for about 3 years and have been innocently flirty online, my company transfered me out of state but we kept in touch, since we still work for the same company recently i went back to my old site for some training, (and i will continue to do that probably every 3 months), when we saw each other we got very happy and planned to meet after work, we ended up in a hotel and had sex, not very good sex, he orgasmed too fast, i wasn't at all satisfy, it was kind of and akward moment, before this i have never cheated on my husband (i been marry for 8 years, and him 4), and he claims that he never cheated either. In the last 3 years aside from the flirting we had had a nice friendship, fun and stuff, but now after we had sex things are just akward, we haven't spoke to each other (it was about a week ago), i left without saying goodbye, and now we are both online and haven't said a word to each other, but i want to talk to him, please advise
2006-09-11 07:46:49 · 11 answers · asked by PR 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
My goodness have you messed up.....whew. No condemnation from me, you are asking for advice. You've made a classic mistake and banged a "friend" - now what? Eventually it might be best to talk to the guy about it and sorta clear the air, but it should be done face to face and in a setting that isn't conducive to having sex again.
As for your husband....If this is TRUELY a mistake and a one time thing that you sincerely regret, don't tell him. You've got to carry the burden of your own guilt and telling your husband would not be productive at this time. Use this episode as an object lesson to yourself. Everyone can make a mistake, but only a fool repeats it. You had better do some serious examination of your marriage and find an answer as to why your fling happened. Are there issues, or was it just temporary insanity on your part. You need to find the cause. Good Luck!
2006-09-11 08:31:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, what the hell were you doing having sex with someone other than your husband? Sorry to be harsh, but there are vows you take, love, honor, etc... If you aren't happy with your husband, get a divorce.
Second, what do you care if this coworker is still your friend or not? What kind of 'friend' helps you cheat on your husband and cheats on their wife doing it!?!
Third, what are you looking for here? Get over this person and just hope that your husband doesn't find out.
You really should feel badly about this and make it a point to not see this person again outside of the office.
2006-09-11 14:57:38 · answer #2 · answered by J B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing is probably you dont even talk to him for a while and let things cool down for a bit.... If you really love your husband i am sure you will never do this again and is probably better that you never tell him what you did.... it was a mistake and probably not the last one what will make that kind of mistake and later on regret it.... sometimes some things are better left unsaid.
2006-09-11 14:51:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just send him a straight non-commital email asking how he is doing. Don't mention the night, he may be feeling guilty and unsure of how to continue you his friendship with you.
Both of you just need to chalk your night of fun up as just that - A night of fun. And go back to looking at each other as friends.
2006-09-11 14:57:00 · answer #4 · answered by Just Another Guy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you guys made a mistake and you have to never do that again. If you want to tell your husband that is fine but it kind of worries me that you did not say anything about feeling guilty. If you want to you can keep this from your husband and just never do anything like this again.
2006-09-11 14:51:58 · answer #5 · answered by Rachel Bitchface 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It can be awkward after a spur of the moment affair but just be casual.
2006-09-11 14:55:30 · answer #6 · answered by bad_bob_69 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
what u did was morally reprehinsible .. but you want advice not judgement.. my only advice is to come clean tell his wife and your husband of what transpired, next offer them the chance to entertain each other, there by settleing the score,, one time no questions asked,between his wife and your husband....
2006-09-11 15:11:24 · answer #7 · answered by kewl69charger 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
isn't it great to cheat on your husband , and then find out you had bad sex, ,,what a shame, i bet your proud of yourself, how does it feel to be a low life slut,, i feel sorry for you're husband being stuck with a loser like you
2006-09-11 14:56:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
sounds like you too carried it alittle too far and are sorry you did. i would just let it lay and unless he brings it up .............sounds like your both cheaters and i feel sorry for your mates . you got what you deserved esp when it wasn't even that great . shame on both of you.
2006-09-11 14:53:37 · answer #9 · answered by tistaskpickmine 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
just start talking act casual and don't bring it up...or just slowly bring it up...
2006-09-11 14:50:10 · answer #10 · answered by Voicekiller 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋