Well, a friend of a friend moved over around my area a while ago. I did my best to help him settle down, like picking and sending him around to get stuff done and bring him around to get familiar with the area. He is alright, but the thing is he is VERY CHEAP. He wouldn't spare a dollar to buy me a drink when we go cycling (i left wallet in car) and it is really getting annoying because he don't have to spend a single penny on gas. There is many more cheap acts he did that is similar to this line (or actually even worse) but I best not unleash all my fury, just in case he yahooQ&A too. :-( heheh..
What should I do?? I really think it's unfair for that cheap *** to take my generousity to his advantage.
(Should this qn be under etiquette?)
2006-09-11 03:32:58 · 19 answers · asked by shuddupfirst 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
ps// No, i WAS NOT expecting him to pay me gas money or ANYTHING. It just ticked me when he blatantly refuses to offer (or maybe offer to LEND) me a buck for me to get water when he clearly knew i forgot to bring my wallet. =Even after all the stuff I did for him=
2006-09-11 03:59:46 · update #1
Are you driving your friend of a friend around the area to show him around or to help him do errands?
If you are showing him around and he won't even buy you a drink, I think it is safe to say that your duties as a tour guide have stopped. Be a tour guide to someone who values your work.
Are you taking this person around to do his personal errands? Get gas money up front. He's got eyes, he sees the gas prices. No love, no ride.
This person is a friend of a friend. You tried the person out and don't like him. Just phase him out of your life. Be "busy". If your mutual friend asks why just tell them the truth. It is likely that your friend already knows this.
2006-09-11 03:57:56 · answer #1 · answered by Think.for.your.self 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
You should distance yourself from people with extremely different spending habits than yourself unless they are family or really good friends and you have talked about/come to terms with it. Money is one of the biggest deal breaders when it come to friendships and relationships and this guy obviously isn't very up on his friendship/common courtesy spending. Could he be so broke that he really can't afford it though? Don't bother with him if he's just too cheap to show a bit of gratitude for all the things to did for him!
Best way is too be legitamitly busy with other areas of your life. Or just tell him you are joining some new evening activities (in an area that you know he's not interested in, don't even give him a chance to invite himself). Good luck with this!
2006-09-11 03:40:38 · answer #2 · answered by Iristine 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG, I really feel sorry for you. I know exactly wht ur going thru. Lsn, best thing is to just not hang out with him anymore. If he calls you dont answer. Always say you're busy. Get new friends. Make him feel bad for taking advantage of you. Do this by telling ur other friends one of your 'cheap friend stories (like the ones in ur question)' while ur cheap friend is present. He will feel so ashamed and his diginity will fall to the ground and he will surely correct his ways. If he doesnt, then dump him and tell him straight to his face.
2006-09-11 03:40:26 · answer #3 · answered by Barca Fan 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Depending how good of a friend hi is, you might talk to him about it. It might be that he's very poor. But still, that doesn't excuse his not at least "loaning" you a dollar for a drink.
If that doesn't work out, just start giving higher priorities to your other friends and tasks. He'll either get the hint, or no longer be an issue.
2006-09-11 03:36:59 · answer #4 · answered by Know it all 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say you do get irritated at times. Why not just talk to him, tell him "we need to do something about getting you some wheels" Tell him how you feel. Maybe he just thinks you want to have someone hang around with. Help him find a place of his own, if you don't want him there with you. You'd be surprised how getting things off your chest will help .
2006-09-11 03:59:35 · answer #5 · answered by Jeannie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People who get taken advantage of are people who LET other people take advantage of them. That doesn't excuse him from taking advantage of you, but you cannot control his behavior. Only your own.
True generosity is expecting NOTHING in return for your acts of generosity. If you want gas money, ask for it. If you can't get it, and that's what you want, QUIT DRIVING HIM AROUND. There's a lot more to this, but I think that should be enough to get you started.
2006-09-11 03:35:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you set the stage for this ... however, its apparent that the friendship is strained ... fury??? the right thing to do is address this issue with him to clear the air, avoid labelling and namecalling and point out that you were glad to share to hep him out when he needed it, but now that he is on his feet, he should be more considerate and willing to reciprocate when you are in need. if he takes offense at this approach, stop seeing him
2006-09-11 03:50:55 · answer #7 · answered by casurfwatcher 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can either talk to this person or just ignore him. I would talk to him. Explain that you aren't made of money and that even though I have tried to help you as much as I can. I can no longer do it. When he calls just have something else to do.
2006-09-11 03:36:14 · answer #8 · answered by slanteyedkat 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i guess i'm pretty bold 'cause when that happened to me ,i came right out and told the person ,pay your own way, well that's how i found out i was just being used ,cause the person never came around,and i'm not going to pay someones way just so they will be my friend,friends like that , nobody needs
2006-09-11 03:40:48 · answer #9 · answered by cc 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell him you cant afford the gas to drive him all around and if he's willing to help you out, then you'll help him. i bet if you tell him, he'll stop calling cause he's that cheap and doesnt want to pay
2006-09-11 03:36:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋