this is our 5th year of married life.i used to do oral sex for my hubby.my hubby feels sometimes pain and he say its sensitive,but still now i dint saw him to coming or enjoying.i wish he should have atleast once when i do.in this five years he didnt had one.but when we do inetcourse he has pleasure.we does intercourse daily and no probs with that ,no pain nothing.please help.
2006-09-11 00:39:21 · 11 answers · asked by cute mary 1 in Health ➔ Men's Health
My current wife told me stories of her past lovers, one of which was a guy who didn't enjoy oral sex performed on him, which was a first both for her, and to me since I thought all males of the species were into the art of fellatio performed on them.
First, I just wish to say this; early in our relationship I wouldn't enjoy her oral love to me simply because I thought her "technique" last "lacking" (or should I say, wasn't to my liking). But over time, we learned to communicate about our sexual preferences, and things got increasingly better, and today, she's the ultimate best I personnaly have ever experienced! It's not her "technique" which has improved, but both of our self-confidence and trust which has enhanced our sex life beyond the point of words.
In your case however, I feel that there are a few things which could possibly offer explanation to your husband's inability to enjoy your oral favours.
1) Possibly he has a sensitivity issue which would require medical examination. There is no reason why he would feel pain while you "go down" on him but then not feel any pain during intercourse. This sounds very odd indeed, unless...:
2) You use an oral technique which may proove harmful to him; Although myself am very sensitive, my wife can actually "chew softly" (i.e. soft biting with teeth) on my tool without problem (it turns her on, and honestly it turns me on to see her turned on) , but there's a very thin line between close to the edge of pain (which can be pleasurable) and just above the threshold of pain. Just a thought.
3) If he "USED" to enjoy oral sex but not anymore than it could also be psychological. There are too many variants to explore and describe in this board, so I suggest you try to either talk to your hubby, or better yet get proffesional advice. There are some men who "change" after marriage; they view their wife as some kind of "image" which they cannot associate with, sexually. It is as if men think their wife (who is the same woman) is not the sexual "dynamo" she used to be so they simply stop thinking of her as sexual. This has many levels, so I will not bore you to tear with some of them.
4) On a similar note, it is possible he sees you as a life mate, someone he can make love to, but when it comes to anything sexually kinky, something isn't clicking and therefore he cannot "perform"; he may also be using the pain factor more as an excuse rather than confronting you with it.
I used to be like that; I would be so frightened and ashamed to use my wife as a sexual gratification tool for fear of taking advantage of her, until we talked and she told me she would actually want me to take advantage of her. It took a bit of time (but not all that much!) before I was able to feel comfortable with our kinky and hardcore sex sessions, but when we talked about it and how we both felt about sex and monogamy, it is as if a barrier was broken and now we enjoy some of the best sex we've ever had!
Even she is amazed that today, 13 years later, our sex isn't just AS good as it used to be, it is actually BETTER than it used to be!
Cheers, I hope this has helped you a little bit!
2006-09-11 03:27:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lots of guys desensitize their penises by using penis health cremes. These are meant to be rubbed into the skin once a day, and by doing so it gets the skin and the glans (penis head) used to different textures and stimulations. I have had a lot of success with one called Man1 Man Oil. It contains only all-natural ingredients and is great for overall penis health too. You can get it online. Check it out.
2016-06-08 02:12:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A healthy relationship means doin` what you BOTH enjoy. If he doesn`t like it why force it?
By the way, if you still want to do it try leaving your teeth out. It can cause a baaaaad sensation if it touches the head of the penis.
2006-09-11 00:55:35 · answer #3 · answered by kaszika 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe there is psychological reason for him not enjoying. Maybe he feels like it is wrong, or maybe he feels like he might smell, or not taste good. The main thing is to communicate! Talk about it. If he is unable to talk about it much maybe he really does feel wrong about it, like sinful.
Otherwise, make sure it is all tongue and lip- no teeth. If he is so sensitive, you have to find that point of pressure where it does not tickle but is not painful.
2006-09-11 00:49:49 · answer #4 · answered by Barefoot Chick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oral sex is great, when that's all you are getting. But, if you can enjoy the pleasures of penetrating a vagina...that's all that really matters.
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2006-09-11 07:49:15 · answer #5 · answered by Echelon Right 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get him a dog for his birthday and take your self on a trip. Enjoy life,
2006-09-11 00:44:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
talking is the best policy. if he doesn't like it except it. sounds like you have a good bedroom life other than that.
you gotta consider people likes different things. respect his wishes. and just maybe your too rough slow and easy might be the best policy
2006-09-11 00:55:37 · answer #7 · answered by volleyball55morrow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your husband.
Have him show you what he likes, and how. Ask him, "Like this?" Harder, softer, faster, slower, etc.
Watch your teeth!
Here is The World's Shortest Sex Manual for you (someday, I swear, I am going to copyright this, and make a million dollars!):
"Everybody is different. TALK to your lover. LISTEN to what they say. Find out what they like, and how they like it. Find out what they don't. Do what they like, how they like it. Don't do what they don't like. Repeat frequently, with great fervor."
It simply takes practice. Best of luck to you!
:-))
2006-09-11 00:45:52 · answer #8 · answered by zen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well.....I enjoy oralsex (both giving and receiving) but my wife doesn't.... may be I was wrong in in choosing my wife because you were the right one. My penis is very sensitive too....but I enjoy the feeling!
2006-09-12 13:05:23 · answer #9 · answered by claudioramor 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
save the oral sex for someone else
2006-09-11 01:20:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋