My husband and I have agreed to separate. We've tried to keep things amicable for the sake of our son and for the most part we've managed this. We agreed to stay in our house together until it was sold and then split everything and go our separate ways. Whats upsetting me is he goes out on dates with other women while we are still living under the same roof. I feel he is being insensitive to my feelings, I cannot describe the pain this puts me through - can't he wait until we've moved out? I'd appreciate opinions, thanks.
2006-09-10 19:10:20 · 33 answers · asked by Avalon Myst 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He is being insensitive to you in many ways, he is not respecting you. I know this relationship is over and I am so sorry for you to have to endure the pain of a dissolved relationship while having to to deal with someone who has loss all respect for you. The sooner the house is sold the better off you will be. My heart goes out to you and I hope that you can remain strong for better fruits await you in the next orchard. Stay strong my dear, and you will prevail in the end
2006-09-10 19:19:02 · answer #1 · answered by sharkscue 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Keep the faith kid, just because you're not ready to move on doesn't mean he shouldn't. I know the situation well. You need to get a contract written up right now! You both could go broke if you let things drag out. Me and mine got a divorce, and lived together for a year. Sometimes I would get up at 2:00am and there would be people partying down stairs! I moved into our R.V. by the time I moved out, I was paying all the bill's. Then the bills stopped getting paid and when it was all said and done I made $1,200 on the sale of our home, sold my business and moved to another state. Tell him, "bye - bye" and explain to him separate means Separate Everything..House,car,phone, credit cards,checking accounts....everything. It'll be better for you and the child. I tried it and it don't work baby. Husband, wife, wife, husband, doesn't matter...I was the husband, she did the dating. I waited until I got settled in my own home to start dating. Good luck, and I hope you find someone to happily grow old with.
2006-09-10 19:36:12 · answer #2 · answered by twostories 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry this is what happens when u dont set the rules up for a bad situation.. u agreed to live under the same roof.. but seperately.. ... hun if he cared about ur feelings in the first place.. u wouldnt be getting a divorce so why did u think he would now? I know its hard, but maybe this living arrangement isnt the best.. and maybe u should seek some other option..
2006-09-10 19:19:18 · answer #3 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, haven't you both agreed that it's over? Aren't you just waiting for the formality of selling the house, then it's adios amigo? Aren't you now free to do the same thing? Sadly, when your relationship ended, so did his requirement to consider your feelings, technically. Is this a cold thing for him to do? You bet. Especially in front of his son. Hopefully he's not old enough to see what's going on and figure it out. Sounds like it's over for him, but not so much for you. If he won't be discreet for you, ask him to at least do it for the sake of his son. Good luck, I hope you find someone too.
2006-09-11 03:18:39 · answer #4 · answered by Mike 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm assuming it's your husband who really wants to end the marriage, and you've agreed (but are not happy about it). If that's the case, you need to stop being civilized, RIGHT NOW!
Certainly, don't argue in front of your son. But you need to get the guy on his own, and let him have it. Tell him he's an inconsiderate pig, not only for abandoning you and his son but for flaunting his new squeezes in your face. Tell him if he wants to f&^# women, he can move out right now, and find a place of his own.
Believe it or not, he may genuinely not realise how you feel, because you've been so meekly agreeable to the split. Stop being a nicely brought-up young lady and let your pain out - it's not good for you to bottle it all up, you'll make yourself ill. And you're letting him off easy, when he doesn't deserve it.
On the other hand, if YOU are the one who wants to end the marriage, you have absolutely no right to object if he goes out with other women. He's not yours any more, butt out!
2006-09-10 19:20:52 · answer #5 · answered by Kylie 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can understand how you feels. Yes it is so insensitive of him to go on a dates while you ppl are still staying together but you have agreed to be separated and you should anticipated this would happen. So you really cant blame anyone right now. Its either you talk to him that you not happy or you just have to tolerate. But if it is to the extend that you cant take it anymore than it is your choice to stay or move out...
2006-09-10 19:18:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow, this is a difficult situation. My impression on his thoughts: you two are split so he feels he can go out. My impression on your feelings: you two are still close (living under the same roof) so you should respect each other. My question: How do you know he is dating? Does he tell you or does he actually bring them back to the house? Be strong and do what is best for you,
2006-09-10 19:16:10 · answer #7 · answered by treasureisland85 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Great your being so adult about breaking up for your child's sake. I am sorry for his actions and insensitivity's ask him to be discrete as not to upset the child also have 1 weekend he gets to go out and 1 you do take turns. And make rules nobody is allowed to bring ppl home or around your son till it's serious. Now your single and have some freedom also live it up..or you could play his game and watch him get nasty as hell.
2006-09-10 19:21:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your husband does sound like an ass for doing that to you. Separation & divorce isn't easy I'm going through it myself. I think the main thing is don't let him walk all over you. Aproach him with the issue & don't let him know that it's hurting you. I would tell him that if he couldn't have some degree of respect for your situation & your child that he has to leave. Stay strong & try to focuse on your child it will end soon. I wish you all the luck this world has to give you.
2006-09-10 19:22:32 · answer #9 · answered by wildflower0306 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think he's being vry selfish and insensitive. Plus, that's not a good way to transition your son into the concept of his Dad with other women. And if it's so important to him that he date right this second he can at least put some effort into hiding these casual relationships from plain site.
He's probably got a buttload of material to work with...you know - hes lird plenty.
2006-09-10 19:25:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋