why does the "other" woman expect respect when she becomes the wife finally?

Answer 1

My guess would be that since the relationship has been made legal and permanent (supposedly anyway), she thinks that his friends and family should accept her as his wife, and give her the respect she is due. She probably believes whatever crock the man told her about how horrible his wife was. It was her fault he strayed, she couldn't keep him happy, she didn't understand him, blah, blah, blah.

Any woman who expects to get treated nice after she started out as an affair is in for a rude awakening. She'll be the "other woman" for a long time, especially to people who liked the first wife, and saw the man for the cheating scum he is. If she will sleep with a married man, her morals can't be that high. If she didn't have the decency to stay back until his marriage was over, then she doesn't respect herself, or others. If she was willing to go on behind another woman's back with her husband, she can't be trustworthy. (and all that other stuff) It's hard for people to see past their own sense of morals and responsibilities. So she should expect to be treated accordingly to her actions.

Answer 2

Never. If the woman was seeing a man while he was still married to another woman, then she will always be "the other woman" to the first wife. Because the first wife may feel the 2nd wife stole her husband. I would never get over that if i was the first wife and would always think of the 2nd wife as trash.
If the new wife however did not see the man during his first marriage or the 1st wife left the man and not the man left, then she is not the other woman once she got married to the man.

Answer 3

You know I read these q & a's and my skin crawls. First and foremost, for all the self rightous people who are trying to save the world get a life! If a man and a woman end up together irregardless of who is at fault they are adults and make adult decisions. Right or wrong, this is the choice they make. Get over it! And for those who state "homewrecker" hello, you cannot destroy something that is solid! Come on think about it, if you have a great marriage and are solid as a couple no one can get between! As far as your question about "respect" why should you even care? Does it matter if people like you? Seriously no one is perfect and Karma is a wicked thing, especially for those who are so quick to judge and categorize a situation. Remember, what you hate most is what you will carry in your own home! Don't hate for these things, just know not to do them yourself and make decisions for yourself! The rest doesn't matter!

Answer 4

Because she has the mindset that she's won some sort of prize. Truth be told, all she ended up with was some garbage that didn't deserve you. The next time she demands respect, simply tell her that respect must be earned, and when she does something positive, worth respecting, you'll consider it. Until then, homewrecking isn't a valid cause for respect, it's disrespectful. And if she questions it, tell her she must have missed the memo on morals and values. Then offer to give her a copy!

Sorry, been cheated on and I have no tolerance for homewreckers!

Answer 5

My ex's girlfriend was demanding respect before she ever became the wife, LOL. Well, I have to say that life is pretty miserable for both of you if you don't, at least on the surface, respect each other. Having been in this situation, I can tell you that I would rather have peace then constant back-and-forth with another woman. So, suck it up and try to take baby steps....

Answer 6

Hi, by the sounds of yr situation, gender role confusion may also be attributed as part of your problem, coupled with 2 sets of rules, one for her, one for you. Obviously you would be aware that respect is earned rather than just assumed or asked for. 100 points to you for being a gentleman, any women needs to appreciate and show gratitude for this rare trait alone! BTW, I am a firm believer in the husband/father being the head of the household, and when this is not taken for granted or abused, it works beautifully! Hope you don’t mind me saying, I have a strong feeling that your probs may have deeper roots in other areas! Good luck, Warm regards…

Answer 7

Good question, and since my best friend is in this situation, we've actually discussed it.

The best we could come up with was magical thinking. Somehow they seem to think that just because time passes, and people 'forget" the details, that she will be treated like she deserves some respect.

In my friends case, she refused to take back her maiden name (which infuriated her ex, and the tramp, now fiance). They have tried to ease back into our social group only to be referred to as "J** and that b**ch that broke up his marriage".

And btw, my friend thanks God every day for that woman, cause it saved her from another 25years with that a**hole J**.

Answer 8

the other woman is less than a woman and gets everything she deserves
cheaters suck
she deserves no respect but also the guy made the commitment to you she didnt
but that goes on morals and it is obviously neither one of them have respect for you or themself or the sanctaty of marriage
sorry
the other woman and the cheater need a butt kickin

Answer 9

who knows but respect is something earned NOT given! Like momma always said " expect in one hand and schit in the other and see which one fills up first!

Answer 10

cuz they're FOOLS!!! If they were smart they'd never been the other woman cuz now all they did was put themselves into the same spot they put that 1st wife. ha ha karma is a biotch and it sure will come back to her.