please read and tell me what u think.
i have a 27 yr old male friend who i have dated in the past. he and i are just friends now but sometimes spend time together. he has often times talked of wanting to have a baby bc he has no kids but really wants one. he is not in a relationship w/ anybody but feels that he still wants a baby. i think he would be an excellent dad bc he's good w/ all kids, including my four yr old.he was also told, when he was a teenager, that he wouldnt be able to produce children but doesnt believe the doctors. well he and i slept together last month and now i am pregnant. the problem is i dont really want another kid right now. i especially dont want one out out wedlock again. what should i do? should i tell him im pregnant and this is his kid?i cant terminate this pregnancy bc thats against my beliefs but i am so scared he wont feel the same now that having a kid is a reality for him. this is tearing me up. i dont know what to do
2006-09-10 15:12:17 · 27 answers · asked by the_kid_doesnt_care 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
in addition to answers some of ur questions. its not against my religious beliefs to have an abortion, its against my personal beliefs. secondly i am sure this kid is.
2006-09-10 15:26:56 · update #1
Well if he wants a baby, and you two are good friends then my guess would be that he would be ecstatic about it.
I know you are probably feeling a little freaked out by being pregnant again, and not married, but hopefully if you want to keep this baby then you can raise it together and he will have the wonderful experience of having a son or daughter. Just make sure you let him know as soon as you have had time to make a decision.
I would bring up the whole wanting a baby thing with him again, and say something along the lines of "So do you really want children someday?" If he says yes, then tell him. If he says no, break it to him gently...
Good Luck!! Hope this helps
2006-09-10 15:17:58 · answer #1 · answered by jessica 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him... If he wants the child discuss whether he would like to raise it; if so you can sign over your parental rights. If he doesn't want it then put the child up for adoption... Infants are more readily adopted than older children so the chances are that your baby would go to a loving long-term home.... There are even places where they do open adoptions- that's where the child and biological parent have a relationship or at least the child knows of their adoption and how to contact the biological parent.
Talk to him first... It takes two to tango and he should be involved in this decision- especially since it sounds like you have a solid friendship behind you.
Best Wishes!
2006-09-10 22:22:02 · answer #2 · answered by annathespian 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it's a little to late to now to not won't another child..You slept with him knowing what could have happened and it did, so the right thing to do is to tell him if he has changed his mind I'd say to late it's on it's way..If he's as great as you say then he will be tickled ..As far as out of wedlock it's to late to think about that now. So make the best of the sitution , and if he's a good man he will help take care of his responsibilities...Good Luck..
2006-09-10 22:21:04 · answer #3 · answered by Just Dreamin' 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should definately tell him that you are pregnant. You have to consider his feelings when deciding what to do with the pregnancy. If you don't want the responsibility of another child, you could sign your maternal rights over to him, or just give him custody. If he had custody you would be responsible for child support but you would be more likely to have visitations.
He has every right to know that this is happening and he can help you make the right decision.
2006-09-10 22:16:46 · answer #4 · answered by S. O. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well let the guy know you are pregnant with his kid and your not ready to have another kid or have a another kid out of wedlock and he isnt the one you wanna marry and just ask him what he wants to do about it hopefully he has money, a job, a car, and his own place and is ready to be a single father get him to adopt the baby and sure you can probally see the baby still hopefully it all will work out
2006-09-11 01:07:22 · answer #5 · answered by raver_love420 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you have to think about what you want to do. I understand that he wants children but what YOU want. You have to face reality, what's going to happen when you do have this baby? Is he really going to be there like he claims to be. Is he talking about having babies after sex? You definitely have to let him know about the pregnancy. Since you don't believe in having a abortion you have to start planning for the future. But definitely let him know right away. Don't wait any longer. I hope everything works out for the best and please let me know what happens. Take care.
2006-09-10 22:26:38 · answer #6 · answered by elementsoflife06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd just tell him that it's his child. You're already pregnant and you dont believe in abortions so you really dont have a choice. I dont think it would be right to keep it from him that you're having his child, and as much as you say what a good father he'd be, and how badly he wants a child, I see no reason why you dont want to tell him. I hope everything works out.
2006-09-10 23:52:38 · answer #7 · answered by nena102800 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I would tell him. You don't want to have an abortion so he will know that you are pregnant and will have a baby. If you don't believe in abortion then you probably also don't believe in deciet and not telling him would very decietful and hurtful seeing as though he wants a baby so bad. Are you absolutely positive that he is the father? b/c you wouldn't want to get his hopes up either and it be a mistake. So, tell him and ease your mind, the baby will arrive regardless. Best of luck!
2006-09-10 22:19:12 · answer #8 · answered by mama2be 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well its really hard to give ur baby away...let him know u pregnant n if u gonna give him the baby, i think u should get apart from him cause how u gonna tell ur baby that u didnt want him n thats why u gave him to his dad?? thats really gona hurt. or u can go back together n have a nice n loving family.
2006-09-10 22:19:28 · answer #9 · answered by Liz 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have to tell him. You have 8 months (maybe) to figure out what to do. It sounds like you have a decent man to depend on. Hope it all works out for you, your friend and the baby.
2006-09-10 22:21:06 · answer #10 · answered by cranky_gut 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋