no but my mind to give him another chance for our kids.But I know that his going to the same s**t again.
2006-09-10 12:42:53 · 11 answers · asked by baby girl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Giving a marriage another chance for the kids is not always the best decision at times. It should be dependent on what made the separation happen. If things are not going to change which caused the separation, the worst decision is to get back together for the sake of the kids. I always refer to every time I think of this situation is this question: Would I want my children to have a marriage like this when they grow up? Kids learn a lot about relationships from their parents and from society.
2006-09-10 13:36:42 · answer #1 · answered by dawncs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your first duty is to the kids and, guess what? It's abusive to them to let him come back!! Why? Because they absolutely sense and know very, very well about the tension and stress between the two of you. They are a WHOLE lot better off having one loving, supportive, caring, nurturing parent in the house than one like that and one turkey. Unless he's done the work with a therapist and had tremendous motivation, his behavior won't change one iota. Don'e abuse the kids by letting him come back. And, if you feel like doing it anyway, lay down on the couch until the feeling goes away.
He has to PROVE without a shadow of a doubt that he has changed before you should even consider what he wants to do.
2006-09-10 19:58:50 · answer #2 · answered by DelK 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
DON'T do it. If you go against your own feeling, what sort of start is that?? And kids suffer more from "back and forth"-ing. If you've managed to leave, and get on for this long, don't change it--not when your heart/guit is telling you "no"!*Every* time I have ignored that feeling, I have regretted it! Stand firm:) You will be ok. And by raising the bar in this way, with a clear no to him, you will be opening the way for more love and respect in your life. It's avery attractive quality, self respect. Good luck.
2006-09-10 19:50:17 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Truly depends on what sh!t your talking about. Was it that he ignored you? Or was it that he cheated on you? If it was the first, maybe now he can appreciate you...if it was the latter...forgive, but don't go back to that buffet of punishment. Tell him that you will gladly accept the divorce and also be a very good friend to him. He is welcome in your home, and he is welcome to see the children anytime he likes. Sorry, but sometimes, when a bridge is burned down, the cost is too high to rebuild. This is one of those times. Only you can answer, and I think you did.
2006-09-10 19:50:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think my situation is the same as ur husband. I have approached the same question with my wife. Now i realise it just simply dosnt work. Be fair with ur kids,both of u put them 1st,but move on with both ur lives
2006-09-10 20:21:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it's going to be the same **** again, then you'd be doing neither yourself nor your kids any good. kids need to see a healthy relationship between their parents - whether they're married to each other or not.
2006-09-10 20:45:01 · answer #6 · answered by booktender 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it. You're 5 yrs from the problem. Why go back again and have to start all over?
2006-09-10 19:51:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You already know what to do. Sounds to me like a good decision. Just say no!
2006-09-10 20:06:25 · answer #8 · answered by ANGELa 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make the decision on Intelligence above Emotion. You are already saying that the same old s h it will happen again.......is that what you want??? Why in the world are you still married to that guy after 5 years??? DUH!!!!
2006-09-10 19:50:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Trust your heart.
If you have that gut feeling it's going to be the same old mess, trust it. Your mind will try to rationalize it, but in my experience, its always best to trust your gut.
Best of luck!
2006-09-10 19:46:07 · answer #10 · answered by Nikki T 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋