the other morning i was messing on the computer and i found a search he did, asking why he hates his wife. i asked him about it, he just kind of laughed. today he got completely nasty. i asked him "why do you hate me" he said because i am a *****. i asked him "if you hate me then why are you still here?" he said he wonders the same thing everyday. as far as i know, i have never done anything wrong, aside from social mistakes, you know, accidentally hurting a friend's feelings. stuff like that. but i do not hink i have done anything worthy of hate! so if he DOES hate me so much and i make him so miserable, why is he here? why can't he just leave already? we have always gotten along, believe me, i never saw this coming. but if he doesnt want to be here then i do not want him to be here. we have been together for nearly 10 years, i am so confused and hurt, stuck waiting to see what he decides, i am afraid to ask!
2006-09-10 12:23:07 · 24 answers · asked by bad kitty 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
we have 4 kids together and the house we live in belongs to my grandparents. because asking him will only start a fight.
2006-09-10 12:30:37 · update #1
you HAVE to ASK.. sit down and have a serious talk with him... and make your conclusion from everything... ask him what makes him feel that way and why...
2006-09-10 12:26:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't stick around for his decision. Instead, leave him.
First of all, if he is saying he hates you on the net, telling you to your face and saying you're a *****, then he is obviously not worthy of having a relationship with you.
You seem like a nice person... don't allow him to decide what your future will hold.
I know it's unexpected but since he wants to be so rude, you should leave or make him leave your home, and move on.
This guy doesn't deserve a woman like you and could be cheating as well.
2006-09-10 19:29:15 · answer #2 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your husband lacks communication skills. It sounds like a lot of marriages when one person is unhappy about small things - they never talk about it - and then over 10 years you just turned a bunch of small things into a huge pile of garbage. Best advice is don't wait around for him to make the decision to leave. If he truly hates you and won't leave because he's scared or weak - do yourself a favor and leave him. You don't deserve to waste another minute with someone who doesn't want to be with you. Each day you spend with him is a day you could have spent with someone else who would love and appreciate you for the person you are.
2006-09-10 19:29:11 · answer #3 · answered by sunssecret 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you have to wait for him to decide? Why can't you just leave? It sounds like he's cheating on you. He's getting nasty because you've only scratched the surface of what he's been up to. He's probably afraid that you will dig deeper so he figures if he distracts you it will keep you from finding out any more.
Stop waiting on him to make the first move.
2006-09-10 19:31:36 · answer #4 · answered by NyteWing 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be that he is afraid of loseing money.. I have been talking to a married man... nothing more and I asked him why he don't leave if he is so unhappy..
He told me " doesn't want to hurt the kids and grandkids" and he is to old to start over.. he is in his early 50's
Sometimes it is fear to be out in the world alone that makes a person stay where they are not happy..
And for sure.. sometimes it is not you..it is him.. and his problem inside of him.
2006-09-10 19:47:28 · answer #5 · answered by Ibdreamin099 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well maybe his just tired of you or maybe his messing around with someone and his just saying to blame you of why his hating you but I think you should ask him if he do hate you. i know how you feel cause now Im going through a divorce because I just don't want to be confused cause we both have four children and I think it's best for me to just end our marriage because what happen with you its happened to me that he said he doesn't want to be with me and I found that he had someone else. But If you want to fight for your husband is he worth on trying. Anyway Good Luck on asking your husband.
2006-09-10 19:51:37 · answer #6 · answered by Hawaiianlady 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would be scared of him watch Ur back cos there's know telling whats on his mind just be careful do u guys go out to eat or to clubs or parties sounds like u too need time to spend together don't give up on him try to work on it anyway u can keep Ur head up have u every did any thing nice for him try that then he might come around or just sit down and talk about whats troubling him then if he doesn't wont to talk i think the best thing is that one of u leave and don't look back just be careful cos he is looking up things on the p.c. of why i hat my wife well good luck i wish u the best of luck trying to work this out with him (if there r kids involved)
2006-09-10 19:36:09 · answer #7 · answered by Felecia M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First I'd like to say that I'm sorry that he's putting you through that SH**. It doesn't "sound" like he still wants you. Are you sure that he's not cheating? If you know that you haven't done anything to warrant his actions, then it's definetly him. If he hates you so much, you should MAKE him leave. Why be married to someone that hates you and admits it?
2006-09-10 19:28:14 · answer #8 · answered by Lynn 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Afraid I wouldn't ask him anything. I'd tell him--"don't let the door hit you in the butt as you leave.
Here's the deal. He's told you he doesn't want to be with you. YOU take charge and do what you know needs to be done.
2006-09-10 19:35:46 · answer #9 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is bizarre - I am sad to here you going through something like this. You really didn't give much information as to why he hates you - do you understand really why he feels this way? I think you need to talk to him more - the question is why do you stay as well.
2006-09-10 19:27:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because it will cost him about 2000.00 in child support! Bad thing is you can't kick him out! So have your Grand parents kick you both out! Then move back in when you find somewhere else to live. You need to start thinking sneaky, if you need some help I will give you my ex-wifes number, I'm sure she can hook you up!
2006-09-10 19:37:12 · answer #11 · answered by Adam 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋