my husband died 4 and a half years ago. About 6 months before he died we had a cup of his *** frozen. a year and a half after his death i was ready to have me and his baby with that ***. my son luke is almost 3 now and im wondering how he will feel knowing his father died before he was even born. do i need to get a boyfriend to get a father- figure in the house or keep it as it is?... i feel like a failure as a mother because of this. please help...
2006-09-10 07:32:20 · 9 answers · asked by KYthehumpit ₪scrappyboy₪ 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
dont marry for the wrong reasons. you are no failure ... explain how you saved your husbands seed to your son and that you loved his father so much that you conceived him in this way. this was a decision you and your husband made at a time of great stress and sorrow because of your deep love for each other. do not think that your son has no father, your late husband is his father and it would be a disservice to his memory to look at it any other way. you will get a boyfriend when you are ready to have a new love in YOUR life. many children have been born after their father has passed away ... the fact that you chose artificial insemination over conubial conception was a fact of fate. don't feel bad about this, it must have been a great love and you are admirable for going forward with it. It is far more important that your son be exposed to a truly loving relationship than a father-figure. you have that relationship now because of your love for your late husband. when you are reay to love someone else, fate will step in and you will find that love ... dont worry about your son, he will know his father through you and he will not be scarred by the loss. ... you are not a failure, you are actually a remarkably courageous woman ... you have my admiration and i am a man
2006-09-10 07:49:34 · answer #1 · answered by casurfwatcher 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh sweetie I"m so sorry that you have to go through that, but you shouldn't feel like a failure.. Just explain to your son that he was still conceived out of love even though his father had already passed away. Children are smarter and stronger than most people give them credit for.. I personally don't thing you should just go out and get a b/f so he can have a father figure in his life.. Keep things the way that they are, this may sound a little corney, but things will happen when they suppose to... Good luck, and don't beat yourself up about this.. Your son will understand.
2006-09-10 07:39:35 · answer #2 · answered by Heather 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello..................your husband died you wanted to give birth to a love child to preserve that memory. You have an exotic family it is romantic what you did. you get a man when you find one just as senstional as your late husband.you have reason to feel like a failure you are nurturing your son to be a good man one day, you keep the boy in clothing,you feed him. you keep being a strong mother and your story is so honorable. let your son be in school activities he might men figures there a coach ya know, look to the men in your family.show your son pictures of his father tell him about great times,about his death.be honest,be loving stay focused.stop tearing yourself up,the world can be cruel enough at times.what if you couldnt have the baby.thank your stars for a life that you can enjoy the way you wish.love will come, keep you and your son intact.
2006-09-10 08:00:46 · answer #3 · answered by rasheda c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A father a is a big thing in a guy's life but you have to try not to find the wrong guy. Most guys hate their girlfriends kids because he's from another man.
2006-09-10 07:37:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow kinda weird if you ask me. but hey you already did it. and are you gonna fight with your son. i mean wrestle and run and jump and take him where he shouldnt go and let him find his limits and break them. no most likely not your gonna be a mom who is worried about him getting a boo boo. he needs a man to learn how to be a man. how to act in a argument and a fight and how to act toward women in general. if he learns on his own he will most likely have a hard time of it.
2006-09-10 07:36:48 · answer #5 · answered by gsschulte 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it your fault he died? just tell your son the truth.stop thinking you need a man to validate your life.Love and raise your son.
2006-09-10 07:36:54 · answer #6 · answered by master_der_man 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you made this choice, you should have thought about this before hand, find a man for love and happiness, not a daddy, the right man will be that too
2006-09-10 07:36:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A boy needs a father figure...It is alot more healther!!!
2006-09-10 07:44:18 · answer #8 · answered by 800 bound 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dun feel guilty as single mom
on trends aledi
all male like their whores and cocumbines, he never come back
2006-09-10 07:35:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋