Before you think "Oh, another question about love," just read this.?

Question

I am an 11th grade male. My friend (a girl) and I have been growing closer and closer all summer, to the point where many think we're going out. (But we're not). However, I wish that our friendship was so much more, and I can see the potential.

However, she is still recovering over an ex who she absolutley loved, and it breaks her heart when she thinks of him.

But recently, she has been acting different towards me, even comparing me to that ex (Her ex and I are different in nearly every way).

My love for her is growing, and I can't tell if she has anything there for me. We've known each other for three years and I don't want to lose her friendship.

Any advice?

Answer 1

Don't torture yourself loving someone without knowing if they can love you back. People in America suffer from this disease -- needing to live like they are in some big dramatic movie and harboring a secret love.

Just be honest with her. Tell her how you feel and ask her if she sees any potential between you two. It's really that simple. If you get a "no" then you move on, if you get a "yes" then there you go.

Just communicate your feelings very clearly and be sure to let her know that it's okay to say "no" -- otherwise she may (because she is mixed up about her ex) feel like she has to say yes to stop from hurting you feelings. Make her comfortable and let her know that your friendship will still be there even if she says no.

But - be prepared to let it go and move on if she does say no. Don't let it linger and dig inside you and get all weird.

A good way to start the conversation might be, "Have you noticed that a lot of people think we are going out?"

Answer 2

I'm an 11th grade female, and have gone through a similiar situation recently, but it varies in a few ways. First, let me wish you the best of luck. I'm a girl and I know we can be bitches and difficult at times, so good luck. Secondly, I would just keep being friends with her and then one day, ask her, "Hey, do you have any feelings for me, other than just friendship?" And see what she says from there. If she says no, don't go all emo on her. And if she says yes, tell her that you feel the same way. If she asks you any questions, tell her the truth but make sure she knows that you will wanna be her friend no matter what. When girls are trying to get over a tough past relationship like that they can be really moody, so just be careful and be sensitive.

Answer 3

JUST GIVE IT TIME!!!! Don't push!! There is nothing wrong with being friends. IF it was meant to move into another phase, it will naturally. Just be there for her. When she wants to talk about her ex, even though you probably DO NOT want to hear it, LISTEN!!! Don't criticize him, because if she "was" in love with him, she could take offense & start pulling away from you.
SUPPORT & LISTENING!!! Let her know that you are there for her no matter what. Let her see you as you are & that you would make a good friend & a good boyfriend.
I know it may be hard to do, BUT KEEP YOUR EMOITIONS IN CHECK, until you KNOW her feelings!!! Move too soon & you could scare her off & do not take advantage of the fact that she is hurting & vulnerable.....

Answer 4

Your like 16 or 17 correct? I also am a 11th grader and am dealing with the same kind of issue .... where theres a girl that you really wanna be with but has just gotten out of a bad realtionship and yes its gonna hurt for a while to lose someone you truely love (i'd know lol) but just give her space but shes gotta know that you have theses feelings for her and just be there for her ya it sounds lame but juss be there for her and let her know about how you feel but like don't pressure her into the realationship

Answer 5

If she is that good of a friend, she will understand no matter what and ur friendship will not be ruined if u open up to her. just say: " (Blank's name), this summer I have grown really close to you and I know that you are still getting over (ex's name), but do you think we have a shot?" tell her why u think u guys could work and why ull be better than the jerk who dumped her

Answer 6

I say the comparisons to her ex are a good thing for you. It's so hard to convert a friendship to a love affair and the love affair doesn't always go as perfectly as it should. But, I understand your situation, and encourage you to keep your eyes open for that opportunity for a kiss. Don't be all aggressive about it, but be alert to the signals she sends to you.

Answer 7

continue to be a friend, let whatever is or isn't happening evolve without pushing it or trying to define what kind of relationship it is. it's about patience, you will have the answer to your question. it's good to wait a bit and see, she might just be feeling insecure after her break up, and you dont want to just be the comforting rebound guy after the ex--friends last longer. good luck!

Answer 8

in 607 b.c the northern kingdom replaced into overthrown with the help of the assyrians in 587 the southern kingdom replaced into overthrown with the help of the Babylonians remember the Hebrew twelve months is 360 days. we've 365 and 1 / 4 days in our twelve months, do no longer beat your self up over a twelve months right here and there that is out of kilter

Answer 9

SHE IS REBOUNDING. I would leave her alone until she has gone out with another guy first I know that sounds odd but if you have a shot it will come. She probably loves you too but with the ex still on her mind she will just continue to compare you to him and so on. Just leave it alone for now.

Answer 10

Tell her how u feel about her and ask her if she feels the same wa. help recover from her ex. just come out and be the friend you r and see what happens from there she might have the same feelings somethings might change the future. sometimes u will regret of not telling her. so just tell her.