I'm pregnant and the guy I was with doesn't want any thing to do with his daughter, yes I already know the sex, and my parents aren't talking to me scince I'v desided to keep her (I'm not going to change my mind), and I'v been staying with my best friend she says stay as long as I need, but I know it's a bit of inconvenince for her and her husband, and I haven't found a place to stay that alows kids and I have only 3 more months to find something! What to do?
2006-09-10 05:21:19 · 11 answers · asked by lill_angel_07_88 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hang in there baby! I was in the same situation except my family stood by me. You need to get on the ball and go to Human resources and get him tagged for child support. Then go to the Housing Authority and get signed up. These community and state programs are there for a reason. They helped me when I needed it most and now I'm self supporting. Be picky about where they put you for housing. Here in WV we have a program called HUD see if you have something similar where you live. Get a small house or apartment somewhere you feel comfy. Don't let them put you in a development unless it's nice and not a hole.Good luck sweety your in for a tuff ride without your family,but you can do it just stand tall and be tough for your baby,she's counting on you now. Remember your all she's got between her and the world! Email me if you wanna chat. I'd love to hear how you're doing!
2006-09-10 05:32:13 · answer #1 · answered by sookie1969 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well good for you this means you are an adult and your child will be raised accordingly.Now the problem as I see it is you need some help go sign up for government assistance and low income housing.Go to your local church and make plans for day care before the child is born most churches will help you out.You never said where you are from so I think you need to contact other relatives and let them know you could use some guidance and help most families are kept in the dark and once they realize what is going on it is too little too late.Your parents are angry right now so don't be too mad at them. Go to them and tell them that you have made your choice and your not going to change your mind about it so they can either be a part of your and your child"s life and help you out or they don't have to because that is the only choices you can give to them at this point in time. Explain you may have gotten in over your head here but the deed has been done and your going to live with it no matter what they decide to do. For help look in the Yellow Pages and contact the agency along with the babies father's family. Also go to him and tell him he can either do his part now or later but he will do his part one way or another. Tell this man's family he is about to be a father and therefore he needs to start paying child support right now. You can be nice or you can be ugly it all depends upon how they want you to handle this situation. Chances are they will help you out. I know I would if it were my grandchild envolved. Good Luck Im sorry you are having such a hard time of it.
2006-09-10 12:40:22 · answer #2 · answered by yahoo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go to rent.net or other similar websites and you are able to put in all your criteria and find a nice place. Yes, it is some work on your part, but you will feel a whole lot better after you've done it. Sounds like this will be the first step of many that you will be taking on your own. Good luck to you and your daughter!
2006-09-10 12:27:00 · answer #3 · answered by Kaitelia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you're not already on medicaid, you need to get on it. then you can ask your caseworker for assistance in finding resources to help you. whenever you do have the baby, ask the nurses at the hospital to refer you to the case manager or social worker and she can also help you with finding places that can help you. If you are embarrassed about asking for help, don't be. It's not about you anymore. It's about making sure your baby is taken care of. Also, you are going to have to file for child support. Just because he doesn't want to have anything to do with his child doesn't mean he doesn't have any responsibility . You're going to need as much information about him as possible (his full name,address,phone number, place of employment, where he goes to school, date of birth, place of birth, and his social security number if you can get it). This will make it easier for them to find him.If he denies he is the father then the state will order a paternity test and then you will know for sure. Hopefully your parents will come around and help you. But they may not so you need to be prepared for that.
The most important thing you can do is to not think your life is over because you're having a baby. It's not. You can go still go to school and get a good job so that you don't have to depend on anybody else. It's not going to be easy. In fact it's going to be very hard but you need to do it for you and your baby. Use the resources that are out ther for you. But use then as they were meant to be: as a stepping stone to get you to the next level. You can make it through this as long as you are determined to make it through. Oh yeah, now that you know you can get pregnant, don't do it again until you are able to take care of yourself and the baby you have now. Good luck to you and I hope this helps.
2006-09-10 12:42:32 · answer #4 · answered by fungirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are a very brave girl for what you have decided to do in keeping your little girl. If I was your mom I would be very proud of you for having to decide to keep her. I am not up on all the places that help young mothers but hopefully someone on here knows to go to for help. And may I say congratulations you will make a wonderful mother.
2006-09-10 12:25:36 · answer #5 · answered by auntkarendjjb 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, first you do need to find your own place, start by looking for help with the housing dept in your city.....they will help with the rent.....also you do need to fix the relationship between you and your parents...you will need them this is not going to be a easy journey for you, since the father is not going to be in the childs life.....but this could be a good thing if he is not responsible enough to help out.....he should still pay child support to you......please seek help for this it is out there...look in your local phone book or get ahold of the health dept who maybe able to send you in the right direction for help.
2006-09-10 12:25:21 · answer #6 · answered by thats me 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think its great that u decided to keep it. the father is a retard. and ur friend is great. you need to try talking ot your parents and asking them for help here. they need to really look at this situation and think about it. if they still dont care im not sure how this is possible... people are stupid though. if you have got 3 months left im not sure what you can do, i mean you cant really work. this is tough. but good luck and even if your not religious... God Bless You.
2006-09-10 12:27:15 · answer #7 · answered by Angel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
being a single parent is hard but you can do it. Go to the local housing authority and talk to them, then you need to go to the social services office sign up for medicaid and whatever help they can provide you with, also sign up on wic because baby formula if you arent going to breast feed id outragous. also talk to you parents they are probally as scared about all of this as you are. but you need your parents in your life and your daughters.
2006-09-10 12:41:49 · answer #8 · answered by babygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good for you for wanting to keep the child however it wasn't the best idea. Depending on your age you should reconsider. You may want to think about adoption. You have to think whats best for the baby not you. Its not fair to the baby if you can't provide for her. Keeping her is for your good not the baby's. Talk to other family and social services. Talk to the guy's parents.
2006-09-10 12:29:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hi im sorry to hear about your problem have u tried going to pregnancy help organisations here is one www.bpas.org good luck i hope you find this helpful
2006-09-10 12:29:03 · answer #10 · answered by brazil fan 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋