Rumors, what is the best way to deal with?

Question

I have been a victim of a rumor for a long time and you wouldn't believe how far it got.

why do people do such things? i have never done anything to hurt the one who started it.

Answer 1

I have too, and on many levels. You wouldn't believe how many times. Sorry you are going through this. It can be difficult finding resolutions to rumors, but there are several things that I've done. Hopefully some of them will help you.

* Ignore them. Rumors tend to die out if you don't react to them, as long as YOU know that they are unfounded.
* Counter with rumors of your own, such as spreading the same rumor about the rumor-monger but in a different way.
* Develop a blog or online diary where you can voice your opinions, thoughts, reactions, etc. to it.
* Confront the person/s responsible or find out who initially started the rumors to find out why.
* Talk to someone "legal" about slander or slanderous comments, or even someone "neutral" outside of your area.

The thing to remember with rumors is that there is always some underlying cause for their propagation, usually any or all of the following:

* Jealousy - You have something (or some quality) that the rumor-monger wants but cannot have - be it money, love, etc.
* Anger - Not necessarily anger at you, but at something within themselves, perhaps stemming from something in their lives that they cannot change.
* Prejudice - Something that contradicts their own morals and values, etc. that ticks 'em off.
* Bitterness - Some people are naturally vindictive, perhaps because they have become disillusioned with life and need a "scapegoat" for their problems.
* Lack of control - Often people cannot control their own lives, so they seek others as victims for their own problems in order to maintain that element of control.
* Fear - If people are afraid of something, rather than confront it, they project it out (in the form of rumors) and they feel somehow vindicated.
* Reaction - Sometimes people will *look* for a reaction. It's a form of control and if you react, in a sense you are playing right into their hands.
* Abuse - In some instances, they have been abused (in childhood or adulthood) and some of the things you do cause "mental triggers" which incenses them.

Think of rumor-mongers as "mirrors" of themselves. Whatever they feel about themselves they project outwards, in the form of these rumors, so that they don't need to deal with their own "issues". If you gather all of the rumors that THEY have been spreading about YOU, I wonder how much of it actually applies to THEM in one form or another.

Our landlady, a very vindictive woman (with a some deep-seated issues) has been spreading rumors about the wife and I for awhile now. I tend to ignore her completely, but she still makes our lives hell. There really are no easy resolutions, but in the end people get bored and move onto someone else. I wish you good luck with this and hope you find a resolution soon.

Answer 2

Just look at it like this, the person that started the rumor REALLY thinks you are important! All you can really do is ignore them. As long as there are people in the world, peopla are gonna talk about people, and theres nothing you can do about it. Even if you whup[ their a-ss really good, people are always gonna have something to say about you. So with that said, don't entertain them.

Answer 3

All bullies will say that. Murderers too, new child molesters, and so on...those kinds of folk will say that so as that they've capability over you and are not getting in worry. You neeeeeeeeed to tell the counselor...you could desire to get this documented in case something extremely undesirable happens to you, they are going to be attentive to have been to look first. If she hurts you once you refer to a counselor, merely shop going back to tell. shop documenting events. If she does not provide up, call for suspension or different recourse like expulsion. call the District workplace. there are techniques around the bully. you at the instant are not trapped. ensure you get the help of your parents, siblings, cousins, acquaintances, and so on whoever you have it extremely is close to and costly to you. additionally, stay out of worry, gossip and different worry making interests. The bully will use those issues as justification for hurting you. relatively in case you play with sharks you will get bit. So stay sparkling and look at the e book "The 4 Agreements" via Don Miguel Ruiz... it extremely is a rapid examine. additionally, evaluate having a sprint self compassion. This feels like the continually whether it is not. you will substitute right into a dazzling lady who is familiar with what's ideal and incorrect, you would be attentive to a thank you to %. sturdy acquaintances, and you would be attentive to a thank you to maintain your nostril out of the dirt. sturdy success. xo

Answer 4

Rumors start when people are jealous most of the time. There's some reason they don't like you so they try to make your life hard. Laugh it off, ignore it. Don't let it get to you, that's what they want.

Answer 5

not sure if you ever heard the expression..there is no such thing as bad press...what it means is that as long as people are saying things about you the fascination is there ..so you really have nothing to lose..like everything else in this life..this too shall pass..so keep your chin up and smile.

Answer 6

I sympathize with you.

Anyhoo, I'd say to calm yourself and don't get bothered by those crap. You know yourself better than them, so just let it go.

However, if you think that it's getting waaaaaaay out of hand, lodge a complain with your HR department (if you are working in a company) or ask your school counsellor for help (if you're still schooling). Or if it's people in your neighbourhood who's bothering you, give them a swift kick in their bollocks.

Answer 7

human nature , people don't understand until a rumor (untrue start about, but this too will pass

Answer 8

The best thing to do about rumours is to live up to them.

Answer 9

Don't listen to them. Stop the person from involving you.

Answer 10

I would just ignore it. God knows the truth, and you know the truth, and that is all that matters.