I have been in love with a guy for 2 years. He is a smart, sexy, talented musician who loves God. He's used to girls chasing him and he has had his heart broken by a few. His love interests have all been very capable, talented and beautiful. I am a recovering alcoholic who suffers from depression. He doesn't know. But to him I am average. He hasn't told me I'm not good enough but I think that is what he might feel. I don't want to lose him by not trying, but I'm not sure I'm ready to let him know how I feel. How do I ask him to love someone who feels so inadequate, yet alone ask him to wait for me to find worth in myself? He brings out the best in me and we get along so well. But my best is still nothing compared with his family, himself and his prior loves.
2006-09-09 20:52:01 · 11 answers · asked by shaomit 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you have self esteem issues. You are not average. You only think you are. And the fact that you over came an addiction says alot about you. And it means that you are strong and determined and he must see that in you or he wouldn't be with you. Guys don't date girls that are beneath them. The same or better but not lesser
2006-09-09 21:03:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have issues you have not shared with him....he may have issues he may have not shared with you...Give the relationship more time...maybe a few more months before you bare your soul, be sure not to sleep with him! You will be more intriguing to him if you can hold back! Time will tell more if he is all you think he is...and time will tell if you work through the depression.
and as far as the alcohol goes and him being a musician...that will be the toughest part for you....This relationship has not truly began...you can opt out for safety...or risk it all...but you'll have to be stronger and smarter than the average bear to not fall prey to alcohol in the musician world it is always accessible and freely shared. Perhaps it is a great time to get to know the Lord better and give some time to him on your knees in prayer, and start reading the Bible....God has a plan for your life weather or not this guy is the one for you!
2006-09-09 21:01:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There must be something in you he sees that ur missing, try to lose the negativity, if he`s such a great guy and has lots of girls chasing him he wouldnt be with you if he thought you were inadequate, hold your head up high be proud of your boyfriend but put yourself and your needs first, he`s no better than you, maybe he`s just having an easier ride in life!
2006-09-09 20:58:47 · answer #3 · answered by dreamer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you feel that way about yourself because you been through a lot and you don't think much of yourself. You have no reason to feel that way. Your just as special as he is. No one is perfect. I'm sure he has his faults that you aren't aware of. He shouldn't tell you that your not good enough for him because you are. Just go with the flow and date him if he brings out the best in you. You never know where you relationship may lead to. Love falls in mysterious ways. Keep your faith!!
2006-09-09 21:05:58 · answer #4 · answered by Humming Bird 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweety, no one is better than you. You are as great as you want to be, we all have the ability to do wonderful things, just like you! We all go through tough times, its what makes us the people we are today, I'm sure if you spoke with him about your insecurities he may just suprise you with a few hidden skeletons of his own, honesty is the best policy and if you want to move forward rather than backwards, then you need to be as open to him as possible, he loves you, you love him so you will work it all out, together as a couple, good luck and please dont ever think your not worth it.
2006-09-09 21:00:54 · answer #5 · answered by ♡MaNda♡ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are bringing too much baggage to the table. Doesn't matter if it is real, but it is real to you, and that can hurt a marriage. You might resent things that he says, but going back to your own insecurities and he won't understand. You need counseling before marriage, or do not get marriage without it. It won't come over night either, but just know, that if this is the man for you, it is worth to get rid of the baggage that could destroy your marriage. It is worth healing and cleaning up for your man.
2006-09-09 21:01:34 · answer #6 · answered by shardf 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love unconditionally. It takes time to bring out the best but ur love will surely win him over as well as his surroundings. BE PATIENT and NEVER LOSE HOPE.All the best
2006-09-09 21:05:38 · answer #7 · answered by Achiever 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, don't think of yourself as lesser. You can be as good of a person as you want to be. Secondly, tell him that one phrase you said. "You bring out the best in me."
2006-09-09 20:55:17 · answer #8 · answered by Esma 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust him and open up to him. If he cares about you, he will understand. But, sounds like you need to love you before you try to love someone else.
2006-09-09 21:02:22 · answer #9 · answered by 1Jazzy1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be confident.Trust in yourself.Try to carry yourself.Never try to behave like what you arn't.If it doesn't work,leave it.
2006-09-09 21:02:29 · answer #10 · answered by trivs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋