and then start to compete or put you down? Do you really want a door mat who is less intelligent that you?
2006-09-09 20:24:39 · 25 answers · asked by oceanwaves 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Probably a lack of self confidence. Also, maybe struggling with the archaic concept that the man is supposed to be better.
2006-09-09 21:01:42 · answer #1 · answered by Robert B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I want to be more intelligent than a door mat.
This is a generalization about all men and it's untrue. I think couples in any healthy relationship see each one of themselves contributing to the world in their own unique way. Rather than being threatened by that they feel themselves lucky to be with such a cool partner.
Unfortunately many people out available for relationships are the ones who cannot maintain healty or lasting ones.
2006-09-10 03:30:55 · answer #2 · answered by San Diego Art Nut 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think men find it a bit of a pull between what society tells them is good for women to be and what men should accept and their nature to be the provider. The nature of a man to be a provider isn't a bad one and it shouldn't be taken as an offence; it's a role they have been in for thousands of years, just as we've been in the role of taking care of children. It's just that, modern society is changing our traditional roles and it will take time for both sides to get used to the acceptable changes. I think also that we must realise that some of us don't want the traditional roles to change and those people have to both accept that for themselves as well as find partners who believe the same.
Just because a man would prefer to be the provider also does not mean that he is looking for a "doormat who is less intelligent". My partner and I are both more traditional in our roles but I am in no way a doormat and I have a degree in history which is great for him as we have something in common. Traditional roles shouldn't be seen as negative or positive; they should be seen as options that make us feel comfortable in our lives.
Hope this has been helpful.
2006-09-10 04:15:46 · answer #3 · answered by snowfoxx71 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i guess we try to look for something in between. i personally would like to have an intelligent woman, but that i would be the one who provides the main source of income to the household. i'm not trying to mean that woman CAN'T do it...they do! what i am trying to say is that men need to feel they are sustaining the family and that they are fulfilling their jobs. it needs to balance out. if the woman has a job then fine...but then why do you want to be 'independent' in a 'couple' relationship... they both need each other's moral and unconditional support.
we always waste time in saying 'i do this and that and u dont do this or that'...BOTH men and women have equal importance in the house...regardless of who makes more money.
2006-09-10 03:41:22 · answer #4 · answered by Sir_J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Success or competition? In my eyes there is nothing wrong with both. The way I see it is the only women that go for the ''less sucessful males in careers'' are the women that think they can have the power over those men.
i hate control freaks, the women that when they become a sucess statistic think they can do as they please but let me tell u most of the sucessful women i knew only got to the top by shagging the boss
2006-09-10 03:31:10 · answer #5 · answered by Scatty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because they're giving you a line. Men have this uncanny ability to hone in on a particular woman's values, and then parrot it back to her. Later on, when they've got you hooked, they reveal their true selves: their immaturity, lack of self-confidence, low self-esteem, dependency issues, and on and on. The mature men are far and few between, so you need to be on the lookout for the snakes in the grass. There's one that just walked into my life recently, and I'll be dealing with his manipulative ways the rest of the semester. Thank god, there's one mature man I know as a friend, so that gives me hope.
2006-09-10 03:38:48 · answer #6 · answered by Chatelaine 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If a man is successful himself and has an element of independance it is likely they will be happy to see their partner succeed and be happy.
If a man is competing with his partner it is probably because he lacks confidence, I dont believe all that gender dominance is necessary these days. partnerships should be two people working and enjoying things together like a team.
2006-09-10 03:30:52 · answer #7 · answered by philipscottbrooks 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
when men say they like independent women ... they do not mean totally independent ! But when n independent woman becomes more successful, it's often that they also become more domineering n no man/woman today, like to feel dominated !!
2006-09-10 03:29:59 · answer #8 · answered by PikC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is a difference in being independent and sticking your success into someone's face. probably u re sticking it. and if a woman is really smart and intelligent she knows that she shouldn't show that she is smarter and better than her man. let him win - he will be more grateful at the end
2006-09-10 03:30:04 · answer #9 · answered by jacky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I haven't done very well financially in life. I support my family and spend my spare time doing volunteer work for my community. Those values are important to me.
You chose success in a different direction to me. If you have achieved it then I salute you and well done indeed.
If we could be friends That would nice, and I promise not to hold my choices against you. All the very best you.
2006-09-10 03:29:55 · answer #10 · answered by teef_au 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋