Why is it that?

Question

Why is it that love is so painful? Why are boys so much different? Why cant I forget him? Why has he moved on, but i cant? Does he remember me? Does he know I still exist? He says lets be just friends, but somehow, we arent even that.

Answer 1

It will be fine, just move on.

Answer 2

Love is so painful sometimes because it's so important, one of the most important things about the human experience. If it were less important, it couldn't hurt you. It sure can though, sometimes, can't it?

Boys aren't really all that different from girls, not in the most important ways - they hurt, which is more important than the fact that they often try not to show it. They often try to brush off the biggest things as little, to show how tough they are.

You probably will never forget him, but in time, you'll remember him fondly, believe it or not. The relationship will slip into its proper place in your life as you fill your life with new people and experiences. If you're not moving on, it may be because you're standing in the same place where he left you, looking at his back. Try new places, new faces, new activities. After a while, your life will fill up and the hole he left will grow smaller, because there's so much more in your life.

Of course he remembers you, and always will. What he makes out of that memory you can't predict or control - as he can't control how you remember him. If you aren't able to really be friends now, that's normal -- it sounds nice to say "we'll be friends," but it's very hard to do, and often takes some time apart. You may manage it, but not while the hurt is fresh on either side. It's common to be uncomfortable around someone you used to date when that is over.

You can move on, if you want to. It can be tempting to sit around, nursing your hurt, but what does it accomplish, besides making you suffer? If you, for example, take a knitting class, you can suffer and wind up with a nice sweater, which is better than just suffering. Keep busy!

Answer 3

Thats just the way Love is. When it comes to breaking up one of you is going to be crushed. In this case, unfortunately , it's you. My heart goes out to you. Theres nothing like the pain of a broken heart. The reason you can't seem to move on is because it appears he has moved on. If that makes any sense to you? And why should he remember you? He has a new girl now, right? He says " lets be friends"? Thats just a way for him to slide on out without you bothering him, in his mind. Let me guess, he initiated the break up,? As far as you being just friends? Give it up. Those type of things never work. What I would do if I were you is this: everytime you start to thinking about him and your guts get all knotted up from the pain you feel inside, think of the guy who dumped you that caused these pains. Can you actually love someone that would make you hurt this way? Hell no you can't. That isn't love. You can't make a person love you. It's like beating a dead horse. So everytime you hurt inside think of the azzhole that caused it. After awhile, it doesnt happen over night, you'll snap out of it so you can also move on, Good luck and hang in there. Chew got it , mang?

Answer 4

Look at it this way: it is for the best. If he is treating you this way right now, isn't it better that you found out now that he was like this rather than later, when you were more invested in the relationship? It's sad that it didn't work out, but now you get to be single again, and on the prowl - go have fun! It is going to be painful at first, but it will get better, and soon you won't even remember why you were so upset to loose him to begin with because you will be happy in your new life - minus him. It's probably better that you aren't friends, because that makes it easier to make a clean break. Take this clean slate and start over! You will be ok, your person is out there for you, and you will find each other. In the meantime, go have fun !

Answer 5

Awww im sorry Hun =(. I know how you feel I felt like that so many times. You know that saying you have to kiss many toads to find your true prince he wasn't the right guy for you. You will find that guy but don't be searching for him let him come to you. Also that another lil saying if you let the one you love go and if they come back there yours forever. Let me ask you this have you ever been with someone and you really didn't want to be with and you didn't really want to hurt them because you really do care about them. Well the reason he told you he still wants to be friends is so he didn't hurt you also it could be that he does likes you but wants to see other people. All I can say is call him and ask him tell him you want the truth and be honest with you completely . Well good luck Hun I'm kinda sleepy right now if you want to talk to someone more about this after you do call him if you do you can email me at [e-mail]

Answer 6

i know how u feel. i agree, love is painful and guys are stupid "no ofense" haha but thats life, you hurt and then you forget about it and move on. From every relationship u have u will learn something. Guys can move on faster than girls can cuz us girls are alot more sensetive than guys are. i know it hurts and it sucks, it will take time to forget about him. im sorry, i hope i helped. good luck and hope u feel better and u'll find another new guy that will treat u right n not break ur heart and leave u like that. :)

Answer 7

If he doesn't love you anymore, it isn't love. It might never have been love. The problem is, you're waiting for him to tell you what's wrong with you, to explain himself, and that's not only impossible, it's crazy. He can't tell you anything that's going to help you. No one else can tell you who you are. You need to forgive him, by admitting that it's partly your fault you broke up, and realize that you're still a good person, worthy of being loved, because you do feel bad that things went wrong. People break up because they aren't compatible, so you have to mourn your loss and then let it go.

Answer 8

You can't control it...that's nature's way of ensuring procreation. We get such strong attraction to some people because of our natural chemistry. When you really find someone that 'rocks your world', it is hard to let go and you will feel the effects for very long, even years later.

I try to look at my pain as fascinating...it really is amazing how humans have evolved such complex mechanisms to let us feel pain so strong. The wonder of it all!

Answer 9

he is hiding his pain better than you.Once broken, forget about him, I know its hard,but thats the fun.It will make you stronger for all the future relationships in life.Unless you want to be ruled, then go and beg him, there are some girls who want to be treated like doormats.
But If you want to punish him treat him like a friend.thats what he is not prepared for, he knows you too well and plays with you, its time to play a few games with him.

Answer 10

pain is all apart of life....u can't truly escape it, u just have to deal and move on....talking to someone new is always a good way to get over a broken heart. the main focus tho is making sure u don't blame urself for the break-up....so what he has found sum one new.....she probably isn't half as good as you. u have to realize your worth as a woman.....thats what u really need to value, not ur past relationship....

Answer 11

No one can really answer why. That's just how it goes. You just have to go with the flow and forget him. It would happen in a snap, but evventually you'll get there.