what can i do to feel better?

Question

I've been in canada about 11months now, waiting for my workpermit, still haven't got it. i am fed up of staying at home, i get bored, have gained some weight. i dont know anyone here except my husband and his family. noone seems to understand how frustrated i am - i think i am going through depression, i get happy days and very low low days.i keep comparing myself to people and most of the time feel unhappy, unsatisfied, fat and ugly.my husband tells me i dont need to compare myself to anyone, and that they are all skinny - i'm NOT fat, but it's just not enough to make me feel better. I want to go back to europe, but i have to stay until i get my papers. i just feel so lonely. have lost my confidence and self-esteem. (no rude answers please)

Answer 1

Join a club or a hobby group for something that you are interested in - knitting, DVD club, book club, model airplanes, whatever. If there isn't one in your area, start one.

Join a volunteer group - help at a hospital or with underpriviliged kids. It will increase your self esteem and be a good place to make some new friends. I am sure you don't need a work permit to donate your time.

Good luck and hope this helps.

Answer 2

Hey it's alright...yet you have to admit your husband has a point that you shouldn't compare yourself to anyone, because no one is better at being you than yourself. Imagine if a rose could compared itself to a sunflower and it tried all it could to turn into a sunflower....in the end it just will not work out because a rose can be nothing more than a rose and no other flower can do a better job of it then the rose.

I suggest go to the park for a walk perferably one with a fountain or nice soothing woods for walking in.

I also suggest that if you feel you are eating too much...at least stop eating anything junky like, potatoe chips, cookies, fries, cake, hamburgers, or soda. Especially anything that is in a wrapper, tests have shown that high fatty foods that are processed can cause depressive type mood swings and extra hunger cravings that are uneccesary.

Also talk to someone about your worries of your workpermit that has been delayed. Someone with an especially good ear and attentive eyes.

Lastly do not try to keep re-living in the past. Home-sickness is one of the worst sickness since there is hardly a cure, yet you have to FULLY accept the fact that Canada is your home now and that you must make the best of it regardless of your current situation. I know it is tough but trust me Canada holds many secrets that have yet to be discovered.

Oh almost forgot....look around for something that interests you and make it your thing to look forward to. Like, when I was little my mom at night would sometimes read to my sister and me, and everynight it was something I looked foward too. When she couldn't read to us she always had a CD, a tape, or a record of stories or folktales (audio books) that she would play at night and my sister would fall asleep to those wonderful tales.Those nights made the days just as wonderful. So pick something, (something stress free NOT YOUR WORK PERMIT) whether it is a TV show that makes you laugh, a special art gallery event, a music event, a special cafe you would like to stop by at one day to try the coffee, whatever, it can be ANYTHING!!!

Good luck, really, good luck :)

and remember with immenent patience comes immenent surprises and bursts of joy.

Answer 3

I would say Exercise, Get a hobby, and control your sleeping only to what you need.
You might also look in the health food section of a store for St. John's Wort. I'd suggest the pills form rather than the liquid form. Never could stand the taste myself.
Get people to email you daily from where you're from-Europe.

The best way to deal with depression is to blow it out of the water(so to speak) Do all of these at once. not just one or two that you feel like trying. All. It will most likely take care of most of the feelings about life that you have.
Now, if it remains, you may want to see a doctor about anti-depressants.
It could also be that you just need to go back home. Big changes in life aren't always good. Especially if you feel that the change wasn't your decision.
Good Luck, I hope this helps.
James

Answer 4

First of all. . .do not compare yourself with anyone else . . you are a wonderful individual with your own special qualities. It is frustrating to be waiting for any thing for so long. . .try taking long morning walks . .it will help keep you nice and trim and give you a chance to plan your day; Try planning healthy meals and try specialty shops to find ingrediants that will surprise and please your husband when he comes home to a wonderful meal. Find out if there are any clubs/groups from your country that you can join. Enroll in an Adult School and take a class to learn something new or refresh a talent you may already have. Visit an animal shelter, if you like and can keep a pet, adopt a kitten or puppy to keep you company. Visit a department store (cosmetic counter) and get a free makeover, you may have to buy something, but it will be worth it and fun and you and your husband will like the "new you" look. Feel free to e-mail me if you like and we can have nice long e-mail chats.

Answer 5

Exercise is a great way to improve your self-confidence especially if you can find other people to do it with. Perhaps you could join a gym a sports club or something more gently like yoga or tai-chi - you could even try something totally different like belly-dancing. The most important thing is to get out there and do something.

Answer 6

I think that you should take up some physical activity. Nothing intense, just stuff to get up and moving, Like gardening, or walking, or even just sitting outside and enjoying the outdoors. If that doesn't work for you maybe you take up painting, or reading, or culinary arts, or puzzles, or playing an instrument, writing. Just try to keep your mind and body busy.

Answer 7

you just need to know your loved. i know you know it some where in your heart but just try and think of all the people that love you. i used to be depressed to. and i would have good and bad days. but my boyfriend told me how much he loved me. and slowly he made me less depressed. hope it helps!

Answer 8

try exercising and you can sign up at a local community health club.