If your friend borrowed $ from you & didn't pay back, will you remind her?

Question

I lost touch with this friend for 10 yrs. After a week when I met her again, she wanted to borrow $150 from me. I was hesitant but I felt guilty when she said her husband & kid got nothing more to eat. I didn't ask when she'd pay me back but she's the one who promised she would do so after 3 days.
It's been a week now and I didn't hear from her anymore! I feel guilty to "haunt" & remind her coz I know she needs the $ but she must also consider & ask me if I needed the $ as well. I worked for my money! To me, if she didn't have intention of paying or she'd delay it, she should have at least contacted me and not promised anything at all. She could have asked for "donation" from me and not used the word "borrow".
If you were me, would you just forget about it & her... or will you demand for your $? I really dislike people who "forget" about their obligations.

Answer 1

I'd definitely remind her. If she told you she'd pay you back in three days, she has a responsibility to do so. It was a loan, not a gift -- and she owes you an explanation. You should not feel guilty about bringing it up -- more than once if necessary. That amount isn't exactly chump change, and she should know that you're no chump. You might still lose the money and learn a painful lesson in the process, but you have to decide whether you're willing to just let it go. You can always say, "How much of it can you give me now?"

Answer 2

Either this "friend" has balls the size of Texas or she is really in dire straits. Either way unless you want to kiss your money and the friendship goodbye you obviously have to say SOMEthing. No matter what her current situation is as a fellow human being she must know that you are entitled to an explanation, either that she has no intention or no means of paying you back or she expects to hit the lottery any day now and then she promises she'll pay you (HA HA).
Why not show some compassion and suggest that if she really is in financial trouble she could do some housework for you to pay it off. Just make sure you lock up your valuables while she is in your home until you are sure you can trust her. If she does a good job and proves trustworthy maybe she could get more work from your real friends.

Answer 3

To answer your question, the same guy constantly fall for that line and ends up cashless and waiting... After the third time, it should be quite apparent that this person knows that your going to supply him with money when he doenst have it. The only reason he doesnt give you the money back ASAP is because you allow him to go on without paying you. This is why you have to ask him. I bet you if you didnt ask him, he would of never payed you. The next time he ask you for money, all you have to say is that you only have enough for you, and keep saying that until he gets the point. Make sure when you hang out with him, you carry loose bills and change so that you can accurately count enough money to support yourself. This is the best way to do it without being rude and nasty. Its understandable that this person is going through some issues, but your not a personal bank. You work for your money as well. Dont let someone use you for what youve earned, no matter if its a friend or not. If you two have plans to go somewhere, make sure your friend has cash on him, and enough. If you have to ask, do it. You could be like, "yeah such and such is gonna cost about $45 to go to, if you dont have it we can go another time". Dont feel guilty at all, he should feel guilty for what he is putting another friend through. Good luck and lay down the law!!

Answer 4

When I was in middle school, I would often loan friends money to use the payphone...not nearly the $$$ you are talking about, but I had a policy of requesting reimbursement within two days (weekends excluded), and if they didn't, I would call and ask why...one time a friend borrowed some money for the payphone, and after a week had gone by, had not paid me back...I called her mom, and found out that her wallet had been stolen...my point is that you might not know the underlying circumstances that led to the loan, so you should tread lightly.

Answer 5

I doubt that she "forgot". It's only been a week. Give her another week then remind her in a nice way. If she needed the $ for food for the husband & kid, maybe what you should have done was to just go and buy her a few groceries to hold them over. There are food pantries for people in that position. I know a guy who goes to one and comes home with steak, chicken, cheesecake ect! I can't even afford to buy that stuff! And he was getting more $ in disability at the time than I was earning working!!!!!!

Answer 6

Congratulations. you've just been chumped. Why would you lend someone money that you haven't seen or heard from in 10 yrs??Don't they have a job? Its hubby's job to go make $$$, so if she couldn't ,why is she asking you ? I'd badger her to death over it, then when she gets mad tell her not to ask for any more $$$ ever again.
It sounds cruel, but those who need help can only help themselves.I have a few friends who've lended hundreds to so called "friends" with a promise to pay it back. It never gets paid back.

Answer 7

I don't believe in borrowing money from friends. I don't think you
could have considered her a real friend after ten years. She could have changed to someone that you wouldn't even want to
know in ten years, and that may be truer than you want to believe
too. I would not only ask for my money back but tell her in so many words that if she doesn't pay it back soon you will contact her husband. (if she has one)!! I hope I am wrong, but I think she
just ripped you off.

Answer 8

Never lend money to "friends".

Having said that, I think you should use that as a lesson and forget about haunting her for the money. As you know she is broke. Whatever word she used, it is still up to you to hand over the money or not. From now on, don't lend anyone any money. Tell them you don't have that kind of money to lend.

Answer 9

It doesn't sound like she has the means to pay you back, and you should have been able to recognize that. But I would still remind her a couple of times wihtout "stalking" her. If you get paid back then great. If not, you just learned a $150 lesson.

Answer 10

I would contact her and ask her how things are going and casually ask if she is in a situation to pay it back yet. If she is a friend she will tell you if she is able to, and explain why or why not. If she isn't a friend, she will avoid you, and you can kiss it goodbye. It's $150 worth of experience!