have a friend that has been waiting for this guy to commit to marriage for over 3 years. he'll be with her on weekends and then choose on other weekends to play video games with his friends. she owns a home and he doesn't and now is unemployed. he is 31 and she is 34. everytime she gets mad about it he says that he "wants to try to work towards 'wanting to get married'"
i think it's bull but when i tell her she gets upset. another this is this friend of mine really wants to get married and have children..do you think he'll change his mind?
any adivce?
2006-09-09 12:07:26 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She needs to out of the relationship now. His only using her for what ever pleasures his getting out of it, [ if you know what I mean]. He has no intentions of getting married at least not to her. Like the old saying go's "Why buy a cow when the milk is free?" He might get married someday but not to her. But there's not a lot you can do to convince her of this. She thinks she will sooner or later win him over. Really she doesn't love him either : his now just a trophy for her to win and wants to prove everyone else to be wrong about him. Once she see's she can't break him from his old habit's she will except the truth but for now she'll stay with him hoping and praying he'll want to be with her.
2006-09-09 12:18:54 · answer #1 · answered by Countrygirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately women believe they can change a man, then go into a relation they can't get out of. This guy won't change and at 31 only wants to play video games! She should stay very far away and keep the door open for someone else more deserving.
2016-03-27 04:27:14 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They don't want the same things in life - it will never work out. She is getting too old to be playing around with a guy like this. She wants to have kids she needs to find someone with the same goals in life - because I'm sure she not only wants a good husband - but a good father for her children.
Me and her are about the same age - she doesn't have all the time in the world to be waiting for this guy to change. I don't want to say he needs to grow up, because some people never want to get married or have kids and that is there perogative. They don't have to if they don't want to - and they shouldn't because they probably wouldn't be that good at those things anyway.
Tell her that Trucker Girl from Yahoo Answers said she needs to start looking for a man with simular goals in life - or she needs to just let this guy be who he is and stop trying to change him. Ok, good luck!
2006-09-09 12:15:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The old saying goes..."why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" Your friend is allowing this man to use her without the benefit of commiting to a future. She should cut ties and move on if she wants a "real" man and not just a little boy looking for a mommy to take care of him. If she doesn't get rid of him, well, then she deserves what she allows.
2006-09-09 12:12:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey ...
he says he doesnt want to get married ...so why would he say it if he didnt mean it. Plus he doesnt seem totally commited to the relationship like she is. I think he is just stringing her along...
But on the sad side...there isnt anything u can do abt it. I mean u can talk to your friend but there is a good chance she wont listen to you. Plus it might affect ur firendship also as it wouldonly get her more mad at you ....not at him. So try explaining it to her with patience but if it doesnt work...well there isnt anything u can do. So then just back away and let her find out for herself but be there for her if she does get her hear broken. Tats all you can do.
Goodluck
2006-09-09 12:19:35 · answer #5 · answered by nice_b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's immature and not worth waiting around for. If she leaves him he will either get his head on straight and try to get her back, or she will have been right to ditch the dead weight. But if she stays with him, he will continue to use her and hold her back as long as she lets him. She sounds like she deserves better; he sounds like a loser, a waste of time and energy, and as long as he is getting what he wants by doing what he's doing, he will NEVER CHANGE.
2006-09-09 12:20:20 · answer #6 · answered by cartmansmom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No he doesn't mean it. He just means he doesn't want to marry your friend and have kids with her. But he'll stay with her as long as he can still mooch off her or until he finds someone else. Sounds like a real LOSER.
2006-09-09 14:25:15 · answer #7 · answered by what attitude? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is very plain to see that this guy is not ready for committment so that means give yourself a break. Why not try to find a grown up man? Otherwise it's gonna spell trouble in the days to come. lol
2006-09-09 12:15:37 · answer #8 · answered by dtmc542006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say your friends needs to see the truth and find someone who wants what she wants, it sounds like she's settled and secure on her own-does she want to support this loser? She doesn't need to waste her life waiting.
Like the saying goes "Get busy living or get busy dieing"
I wish her luck!
2006-09-09 12:12:14 · answer #9 · answered by nashiranickel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, he means that he doesn´t want it with you. I know... I was like that. But now I´m married and I have two kids. I guess I found someone with whom I wanted to do that.!!!
2006-09-09 12:10:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋