Is it polite to ask "What do you do?" while starting a conversation with a stranger?

Question

Or should you go with- "How do you spend your time?" or something ambiguous....

Answer 1

"How do you spend your time?" is a better expression.
You shouldn't talk to strangers :P

Answer 2

i THOUGHT it was correct but last week I read in the news the column written by Gaby Vargas. She is a very respected adviser in etiquette and image in Mexico and she says that it is not recommended because it could embarrass the people you are talking to. She mentions an Arabic proverb which asks you to think before saying anything if what you are going to say is: the truth, is necessary and if it is polite . After answering yourself these then you can talk. She suggests not to talk for the first time about politics, religion and abortion for the same reason .

Answer 3

It actually depends on where you are. In England it is considered rude to ask someone what they do for a living. Why? Because a great many of them are on the dole, and feel it is no one else's business.

Perhaps a better approach would be do you like bicycle rides? walks? horses? something you might have in common with another person. Maybe, would you like to get a cup of coffee and talk? (soda whatever)

Just about every conversation eventually deteriorates into one of three subjects so don't lead with any of them. (those are money, sex and politics.)

Answer 4

With a stranger, personal questions including their profession is a topic to be avoided. Instead ask them if they are a native or if they enjoy meeting people.

Some strangers don't like others asking them questions, period. The best way to strike up a conversation is to look the person straight in the eyes, smile, and just say hi.

Answer 5

You know--that question has always baffled me. I know it's sort of the thing to say, but every time somebody asks me "what I do", I feel like they are judging and identifying me with what I just choose to do as a job (By the way, I have a really nice job--I'm a college instructor). I mean, I, as a person, am sooo much more than how I earn my money, lol.

I wish someone would come up with a better line...

Answer 6

Most books on etiquette do not permit you to initiate a conversation with a stranger. You would have to be introduced by a mutual acquaintance. However, if a stranger should initiate the conversation, you should be gracious and respond as you see fit. On a long plane ride, it just might have the time go by quicker... and your two questions would certainly be appropriate.

Answer 7

I've just personally found that when someone starts with "What do you do for a living" that it is a huge turn off to me. I'm tempted to reply "Well, here's my resume!"
I'd rather them say "Are you having a good time?"
or something to that effect..
I base the conversation starters on where we are and what we are doing.

Answer 8

i know declaring something on your ideas works. i'm random so it truly works wonderful for me. something like "Oh, hiya there, pal. even in spite of the reality that that human being may no longer be your pal and may even finally end up to be a comprehensive asshole contained in the authentic it would not be counted because on the authentic of the day you know you're the **** for doing it! no longer that any one has ever been an asshole to me after me doing that yet like I suggested i'm random :D

Answer 9

You know, I usually hate that question because it seems people are more worried to know what you do rather than who you are. In New York City, it's not polite to ask what you do. New Yorkers ask " So, what are you doing here in New York?".

Answer 10

I think Joey on Friends had the best conversation starter when it comes to talking to a woman.... " How you doin?"

When it comes to talking to another guy... search for a woman with a fine body and comment on it.