Did your parents encourage you when you were a child?

Question

Did they encourage you, or did they not let you do things because they thought you would not suceed? My co-worker did not let her daughter try out for cheerleading because she did not think she would make the cheerleading team. The girl, age 12 and in 7th grade begged to to try out, but the mother said, "No you can't try out, you will never make the team" I think this is terrible and she should at least let her try..

Answer 1

awful, pitiful.

Answer 2

that is a sad story, and I agree w/ you, and it'll hurt the child definately, but she's probably only doing what her parents did to her. I can't say that for sure, but from what my parents have always told me is you become your parents.
My parents encouraged me and my brother's w/ certain restrictions and limitations if it was going to be unsafe, and I do the same w/ my 3 girls. We were never the best in everything, but at least we tried.It helped us w/ our selfesteem knowing our parents were behind us. I'm 27 years old now, and to this day, my mother still tells me and encourages me on things, as well as my daughters. She tells me "all you can do is try" and "all is all you have." It really helps me out knowing that.

Answer 3

My parents weren't perfect in all regards, but they were perfect in that they always let me try whatever I wanted to try. Yes, they encouraged me and even more importantly, they trusted me. I guess you would say they were there to guide and make sure I wasn't taking the wrong path, but they would never have tried to prevent me from attempting something for fear of failure. They understood, as I also do now, that sometimes you have to fail in order to become a better person. Parents should encourage their kids to try, try, and try again. They should foster independence and allow their children to shape their own lives. I see too many parents these days trying to mold their children into what they want them to be, rather than what the kids themselves want them to be. Not everyone is meant to be a doctor or lawyer. There are multitudes of success stories of people who didn't become either!

Answer 4

They didn't. After graduating high school I was planning on going to Columbia in Chicago and become an actor, since I had performed throughout high school and my church, and even received a Best Actor award my senior year, but my family said it was too risky, I should do something else. I tried a couple of other things, them always telling me it wasn't a good idea, and now I regret not following my dreams. I'm 25, and even though I don't have kids or am married, I have bills to pay. However, now I have planned on going back to school to pursue a teaching degree and also would like to open a coffee shop in my hometown.

Answer 5

Absolutely not. When I was 8 or 9 I saw a photo of my mom in grade school playing trombone in her school band. It made me want to follow in her footsteps and play trombone but she wanted her kid to grow up to be a first-chair concert violinist. So she gave me a very heavy case with a violin inside and told me she'd already signed me up for lessons. And my favorite sport was volleyball but she apparently wanted a soccer player instead so she signed me up (without my knowledge, of course) to play on a soccer team instead of listening to MY dreams and ambitions. I was even told one day that, because I "had" ADD, I could NOT accomplish anything to which I put my mind. It was only LAST YEAR (and I'm 33 years old) I decided once and for all I want to be a chef.

There's an old Chinese proverb I have in a small picture frame hanging in my bathroom next to the sink that says "Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it". I will NEVER let anyone tell me ever again I cannot acheive my goals and ambitions in life...never again. And neither should any of you.

Answer 6

whoa!!! some confidence she is building with her child that only tell the child that her mother thinks shes a failure instead of doubting her she should have said yes try out but tell her if she dont make it isnt the end of the world and she can always get better and try again. i have a shy timid withdrawn child and i would never tell her she woold fail at anything she wants o dance backup for ciara she has no rhythm but i encourage her everyday to keep dancing.

Answer 7

My parents never encouraged me to do anything, not because they didn't think I could do it, simply because they (my Mum mainly) wasn't really interested in anything I achieved.
Thus has made me be supportive of my own kids though, I tell them that they can try anything they want and it doesn't matter if they don't make it at least they know they tried

Answer 8

My parents always encouraged me. They have always been supportive in every thing I do. I f I would have wanted to be a cheerleader they would have supported me all the way. They put me through singing lesson, dance class, girl scouts, piano lessons, guitar lessons, drama . I was a lucky child and I will do the same for mine.

Answer 9

That is really reprehensible on the mothers part i mean how is this girl going to believe in herself or have any confidence if her own mother is telling her she isn't capable of accomplishing something like that? The greatest thing you can do in life is at least try to succeed, even if you fail at least you gave it a shot this mother is a cretin if you ask me.

Answer 10

man, what a mother's love for her daughter, i have a 14 y/old and i want her to at least try to be involved. if she does'nt enjoy it or has trouble doing it i leave the decision up to her...totally opposite from what the people who raised me did with myself. they NEVER handed out encouragement. i found it on my own.

Answer 11

Yes my parents did and I'm a responsible,capable,resourceful member of society because of there and my grandparents nurturing.Not to mention my time in the military,personal ethics and the ability to forgive and forget.