I am a fun loving party animal and a dj playing trance and techno. I dont touch drugs and am pretty shy when it does come to women im not that ugly yet they still dont seem to be interested. there is a woman who lives near me who teaches and iv already bodged it up due to my cautiouseness because iv been dumped by most of my previouse girlfriends. any advice? No stupid answers either
2006-09-09 00:05:26 · 24 answers · asked by tranquility 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
be up front just ask her out she can only say no, dont be so shy, lifes too short to have a what if? she might even say yes, then you will kick yourself and say i should of asked her ages ago!
2006-09-09 00:08:51 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
perhaps your party animal image makes you come across as being irresponsible and living only for the moment? women like to feel secure. Most would prefer to feel valued as a woman and not simply someone you would be going out with short term for a fun time on your terms.
Have you got any other interests.other than your trance music? Perhaps you should think about finding some hobbies other than your DJ-ing.
Sounds to me like you need to go back to step one as you sound desperate and desperation is never attractive.
First start to evaluate your good points. Ask a friend to help. Make a list of your good points. Then ask your friend or think about, what are areas of yourself that perhaps need a little work. You already said you are not confident so perhaps find out about ways to help yourself get confidence? Take up a sport perhaps, join a debating society. Lastly, don't look at women as simply girlfriend material. When you meet a woman for the first time and you think you like her, forget about girlfriends, start by looking at her as just a friend. That way, if you never become girl and boyfriend, you will always be good friends, and you can't have too many of those can you? Who knows, she might have a girlfriend who would be just the one for you and months or weeks down the line you could get an introduction.
Did your previous girlfriends mention why they 'dumped' you? Was there a common reason? Is it something you can work on perhaps?
2006-09-09 07:17:48 · answer #2 · answered by fenlandfowl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there is a number of questions in your questions that need to be answered in order to get an answer...
Some women (myself included) like guys who know how to party but don't find guys who are over the top attractive. Being a music lover it might be something I personally would over look because you're a DJ.
Shyness, depending on the severity of it can be something that is attractive... While other times because its so bad it drives women off... I completely understand your hesitency because I've been cheated on in every single one of my relationships and have dated for a good long time because of it (not to mention I blow any chances out of hte water real fast).
Maybe you should tone the animal in you down just a bit for now, and suck in the gut just a little bit and talk to this lady or the next lady that catches your eye. You might be able to hit off because you said hello first. Its just a thought.
Brit
2006-09-09 07:15:25 · answer #3 · answered by leoangeldust 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women dont want party animals .Also I know a guy like that and he is really cheap so if you want a nice girl be a nice guy not a freaked out party machine.I suggest you party only once a month away from work which sounds like a party and also that you take her someplace decent like a steak house or the Olive garden.Women are not all money hungry but some men especially ones that party hard are exstremly cheap on dates thus receiving loser status.Best wishes hope this helps.Not meant to be mean simply honest.Remember to tip ! (I once went out with a man who instead of leaving a tip left a little rubber toy fish)Hopefully Im full of it and you are just a real nice guy but women are not really attracted to men who they cant take home to momma.Plus the club scene gets really old.Just talk to her for crying out loud she may love you when she gets to know you and enjoys a good meal with you.Remember guys pay and that doesnt mean sex.Its the price you pay for her company.I dont know where I get this stuff i should of gone to bed four hours ago.
2006-09-09 07:25:53 · answer #4 · answered by butterflyspy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you sound really nice to me, you sound genuine, and with that attitude, you are likely to attract genuine women, this is the reason that you are having problems getting women at the moment, because a genuine woman wont like you just because you are a dj (the kind of women you will attract where you play your sets), because genuine woman will not try and approach you when you are dj'ing. You need to maybe go out to places when you are not working, and just be yourself, and dont be afraid of women because you have been dumped in the past, as there are a few of us good women left. Failing that you can go out with me hun xxxxxxx i.m me kjd2382 xxxxxxxxxx also you can use your being a dj to your advantage, if you spot a girl that you like at one of your sets, and she hasnt come up to you first(so you know she aint pushy or an attention seeker) why dont you go and ask her if she would like a drink and get chatting to her, I know I would be flattered, but just make sure that you let this girl know that your life isnt all about clubs and parties and goin mental.
2006-09-09 07:22:25 · answer #5 · answered by Kelly D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How can u be a party animal and be shy? Your party animal image is obviously a front! Atthe end of the day the problem in getting ladies attention does not come down to how you look, it's how you present yourself, you need to feel comfortable in yourself and be real, not a fake! Then the women will see you for who u really and come flocking at your feet!
2006-09-09 08:52:53 · answer #6 · answered by goldilocksnursery1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I love techno and trance music so I CD burn out by you will be nice...about the shy part, don't be shy and just be "go get it"
I used to be shy and then I started doing customer service to pay for college...believe me now sometimes I think I talk to much and to to many strangers. Good luck to ya!!
2006-09-09 07:14:07 · answer #7 · answered by John R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably party too much and you don't shower enough attention on your girlfriends. Also, aren't trance and techno popular at Raves? Aren't Raves all about drugs?
You should try being a woman's friend first, and be there for her emotionally.
2006-09-09 07:09:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be yourself mate, live life and it will happen all in good time.
Youth goes so quick so make the most of it, you will get plenty in the next few years. Try older women they love young inexperineced men, roses are good, and dinner dates, make sure you have somewhere to entertain them. Or find one whos husbands away on a buisness trip *;)
Live life love is what happens when your gettin on with all the things you want to do!!
2006-09-09 07:30:19 · answer #9 · answered by Jabba_da_hut_07 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alright spacefrog, here's the deal. Stay calm, talk to her in a mild manner ( Don't try being Mr. DJ Superstar ) explain your story, and tell her how you feel about her.
G O O D . L U C K
2006-09-09 07:33:46 · answer #10 · answered by KingCucamonga 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, for one, i'm a teacher and i dont feel it'd be sensible for me to date a party loving animal...i'd actually be cautious around a guy like yourself (i used to frequent night clubs) but when i did this, and even when i was a teeanager and went to clubs, i vowed i'd never date someone i met in a club, they're not the guys you date if you want a proper relationship, they're guys are just there for fun times and thats where it ends.
This is how I approach my life, but then, others might feel differently.
Take care.
2006-09-09 07:09:55 · answer #11 · answered by Wisdom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋