I have been seeing a guy for 4 years..he does not want to get married..he is 57 and I am 53 to old for this kinda of crap. He has another ID name that he has been using and talking to these girls on line. To me people in love do not jepordize their realtionship in that way, and yes he gets whatever he needs from me sexually. He was a player when I met him..but thought it would change. Time to move on to some one trusting? True or False
2006-09-08 07:05:39 · 12 answers · asked by Connie H 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Depends on what he's chatting about. I've corresponded with with others over similar interests, but not over something that's going to jeopardize my relationship. If he's chatting up girls trying to meet others or start up something with them, then I think you already know it's time to move on. If it's marriage you're after and he's not interested after four years, why do you stay?
cheers,
2006-09-08 07:17:34 · answer #1 · answered by ironbrew 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he open and honest with you about this other ID? Does he tell you and let you see what he is doing when he is online with the other ID? Maybe you both show go online as a couple and see if that works for both of your pleasures.
As long as both of you are open and honest about this (and other issues) it should not be a problem.
You have accepted this guy and his behavior for four years, so you are a little late in the game to bring it up unless it is a new behavior.
You cannot change a person - they can only change themselves. Be open and talk to him about what you want and allow him to tell you what he wants. If you cannot honestly agree on issues, then move on.
As long as he is open about his behavior and you accept it, you should not consider it cheating- if he is hiding it from you then yes he is cheating.
Think about it this way - would he still do it if you sat there next to him? If not - this is a problem that needs to be delt with. Telling him to stop will only cause resentment - talk to him and try get him to do more things with you - that way you will be more loved.
Releationships are a two way street - go in one direction too long and you will hit a dead end.
2006-09-08 15:09:39 · answer #2 · answered by Wolf 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's cheating but it could lead up to doing more stuff such as chatting about sex and getting tempted to meet up, sorry don't want to worry you, just want you to be aware. Ask why he feels the need or want to do this chattting and go with what you think is best, if you really feel you can't trust him maybe time to move on as you'll be the one worrying, not him. Or maybe start chatting with men, see how he feels.
2006-09-08 14:23:06 · answer #3 · answered by V 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is just chatting, then its like having a fantasy, which we all have. As long as he comes to you for the real stuff, why worry? If you feel its time to move on, and you can't handle this kind of thing, let him know how you feel. Your both adults, talk it out.
2006-09-08 14:08:46 · answer #4 · answered by Becky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
True....I have been in that same situation except I was married to the guy....once a dog always a dog....move on girl....you can find someone better. I am much happier now, just being by myself.
2006-09-08 14:34:08 · answer #5 · answered by Jana E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A 57 year old player??? Now that is just pathetic!
You know what they say about an old dog....
Go on with your life girl!
2006-09-08 14:08:43 · answer #6 · answered by VANESSMC99 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your right to move on ahead. Giving the chance that he doesn't want to commit means he's not emotionally serious and trustworthy. Go ahead girl, see someone better.
2006-09-08 14:09:57 · answer #7 · answered by camcam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
True. Time to move on. Trust has been compromised.
2006-09-08 14:09:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. Just move on.
2006-09-08 14:20:35 · answer #9 · answered by rohwaldy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
true, can't teach an old dog new tricks
2006-09-08 14:08:55 · answer #10 · answered by captianpr 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋