My last boyfriend used me*for sex* for almost a year, and although I think I knew that he wasn't happy unless we were screwing, I can't stop feeling ugly about it. IDK if I feel ugly in & out, or what, but a part of me is disgusted for trying to make it work while he was talking about another girl while we were sexin, and that thinking that it would all go away and we would be happy. I know I shouldn't want ot be with him, but I still miss him. he has a new g/f now, and it used to make me sad, but latley I've been to depressed to even care. People on here have told me that I need to just "get over it," but I can't figure out how. I feel hopeless and I don't see a point unless males are paying attention to me, which makes me more depressed.
2006-09-07 21:38:56 · 25 answers · asked by crazypantsmcgee69 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Thats really up to you to find out since only you know how your mind works. But here's a hint, if guys hit on you at least once a day, clearly your beautiful. Other wise, you'd be ignored and get hit on once a year. Don't let bad relationship fool you into not liking yourself. Learn from the past, and grow.
2006-09-07 21:41:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all Girl, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! Dammit I don't care what you look like, there is a lonely man (boy?) for you. Hang out at wal-mart or K-mart for a few minutes... you'll be thinking "Damn I'm Fine!"
A few ideas:
1. find a guy THAT IS EVERYTHING HE IS NOT! Not to sleep with mind you, Just to annoy the hell out of him(the ex). Find some way for the ex to find out that you are doing something (sexual) with the new guy - something you would never do with the ex. My ex, who I really really wanted desparately to escape from, got her tongue peirced, Man that irked me!
2. Find some way to get with the ex for a few minutes when he is alone, in a place where his new sucker will be (like his car or his bedroom) and leave something for her to find... Like a lipstick in the glovebox or a girly sock or even panties stuffed into the seat. Or a receipt for tampons, or a empty condom wrapper.
3. Call him and tell him that you've discovered that you have a STD, like herpes or genital warts, that you must of gotten from A guy you were with on the side (preferably at a specific party or on a certain night), and that you might have given it to him. Have some evidence, (like the name or address of the doctor you saw or specific treatment you were given. Or Get a girlfriend to "spill the beans" to him because she "thought it was pretty screwed up that you didn't let him know"
4. If he is online often, find some really awful porno sites and register or sign up using his E-mail address. he'll start getting all kinds of creepy e-mails about Viagra and penis enlargement.
5. Tell him you are pregnant with his baby, or that you were pregnant (at some time ago) - use a specific date or event - like last Christmas or before or after a time when he would have been totally oblivious, and that you had an abortion, without telling him. This is the oldest trick in the book.
6. Be his friend. Be her friend. Get a little trust. Brag up the friendship and blow smoke up his *** til his head is so big he isn't thinking - Then (weeks later mind you) Pull out some real drama, Beg and plead and cry until he lends you some money, or his jacket or something important to him , for whatever, and then blow it on something useless or lose the item carelessly. If he asks for it back tell him "Sorry about your tuff luck there dude" and never - ever - say you are sorry - or that you will pay him back!
6. Count your blessings that you none of the above really did happen to you, you're not infected, or pregnant, or Imagine other ways to get revenge on this asshole for all the times he lied to you or used you.
7. Learn from your experience and grow, Rejoice in the wonder of Life. The link below changed my life.
2006-09-07 22:44:54 · answer #2 · answered by scummibear 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You went into a relationship with low self-esteem. Your pattern of behavior during the relationship reflects that. The best thing you can do for yourself is to talk to a good friend or counselor for guidance. They will help you experience self-love. A relationship with man will never fix the problem. You have to take steps to fix it on your very own. Be single. Don't date. Tend to your hobbies. Find a new hobby. Take a class on cooking, aerobics, dance, or whatever interests you. Make new friends. Continue your education. Get a new hairdo/ makeover. This is a time for you to slowly learn to like yourself and your own company. Start appreciating all your qualities and talents. You're ignoring the fact that you're beautiful. Whatever you do, don't step into another relationship any time soon.
2006-09-07 21:53:33 · answer #3 · answered by Suz E. Home BAKER 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All the other answers are good, so I will try a different approach...if you need some assurance from others whether we feel you look beautiful or not, then send us a picture and let us give you some feedback...You can always get another guy if you want to....the woman is always in the driving seat....but you need to get right with yourself....there is only one of you in this big world, so you are special.....feel happy you are rid of the guy and get on with other things in your life...take up sports or see what you look like in Victoria Secrets sexy outfits...let go of any jealousy...more than likely his new girlfriend is going through with what you did before...You look better when you smile.... :)
Brock
Vancouver
Canada
2006-09-07 21:51:35 · answer #4 · answered by cbmaclean 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its funny! Since you already know all of this and what your weaknesses are with the opposite sex you arent doing anything here by asking a question you already know the answer to. From my own personal perspective when you truly get tired of feeling that way you will stop and move on. You dont need anyone to confirm what you already know. If you find that you dont get tired enough you may want to consider seeing a psychiatrist as there may be a deeper issue that you need to resolve before you resolve this one. Take care!
2006-09-07 21:47:07 · answer #5 · answered by girlsaiyan1979 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't belive what is not true?
Become like a plat prior to blossom. Starting from seed. What does a seed need to grow? Water which is intake as food. What you are lacking in an allegorical sense. After the growth has started you need light. What is light? Prior to blossom you need plenty of the above plus warmth. What is warmth and where does it come from?
Compare yourself to a plant or anything take the lessons in an allegorical sense only you can define.
Plus when something gets burnt enough they either learn not to ge burnt again or stop growing.
2006-09-07 21:48:11 · answer #6 · answered by We Todd Ed 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Repeat this poem to yourself 10 times a day. I heard that it was President Teddy Roosevelt's favorite.
As a beauty I'm not a star,
There are others more handsome by far.
But my face, I don't mind it
For I am behind it.
It's the ones out in front get the jar.
Worry less about what your outside is and more about the inside.
2006-09-07 21:52:58 · answer #7 · answered by SPLATT 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You wont believe you are beautiful unless you value yourself. You have made yourself feel devalued in the actions of the one your talking about. I just went through this and had to make myself write a list of the things I have accomplished in life, the things I like about myself (even if these are small). And ask others to tell you what they liek about you and write it down. I had to stop living my life making myself happy BY making others happy and had to be a little selfish and make myself happy by doing things for me. Be #1 to yourself and put your needs ahead of others and be there for YOU. I can tell by your question that you are a giving person and put the needs of others ahead of your own thinking it makes you happy, but hun... it doesnt...... and good luck! It is still working for me! And I had to put a reminder on my cell phone that goes off everyday at the sametime asking me if I did something for ME today. It all sounds cheesy I know, but believe me it works.
2006-09-07 22:08:48 · answer #8 · answered by the_chavez_family 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are the victim in this situation and your ex b/f is the ugly one , beauty comes from within, so start by realising that you are not the aggressor and that you are not to blame for his behaviour. His selfishness will be his undoing - the wheel will turn and you will find happiness.
2006-09-07 21:46:21 · answer #9 · answered by dragon 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put it this way...u wont die without men "hanging" around u, would u? So u dun need men to make u feel pretty...u r u n every1 is beautiful in 1 way or another.... so dun let all these "bad past" pull u down...u shld b confident n proud of yrslf la
2006-09-07 21:45:28 · answer #10 · answered by D@ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋