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confused help?

This is probably going to sound stupid but i just want some advice. A friend of mine and myself lost some contact over the past year we started talking again about two weeks ago. She is going through a rough time right now she was just seperated from her husband. She called me cause she needed some help with watching her children. She suggested we catch up and have movie night at her house. Two weeks has passed and i have not heard from her. I phoned her yesterday and left a message just telling her i was just saying hello and if she needed help with anything to call and also if she still wanted a movie night. I have not heard back from her about that yet and im wondering if i should call again in a few days or just let it go and wait to see if she calls me. It almost seems like she just calls if she needs something. any advice appreciated

2006-09-07 17:57:23 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Family

14 answers

Since she's ignoring your call and hasn't followed thru on your plan for a movie night it seems she just needed a babysitter at the time. I'd give her the benefit of doubt and try to call her one more time or you could even drop by and see what response you get. I wouldn't go any further then that though. You are being a good friend but it has to be mutual not a one-sided friendship. It's wonderful of you to want to help out but you don't want to let yourself be used either.

2006-09-07 18:13:12 · answer #1 · answered by sunnyca 3 · 0 0

Maybe she was feeling lonely and was just reaching out to an old trusted friend. But you've called her back, so now the ball's in her court. If after a month you haven't heard back from her try calling her again. Going through a divorce is messy, time consuming and draining, so it could be that she just hasn't had any time to call you back, or that she hasn't had the energy. If you call her again in a month and still don't hear anything more from her, then just let it go (as hard as that may seem to be). Don't try to rebuild a friendship when you're the one doing all the work.

2006-09-08 01:06:34 · answer #2 · answered by monkeymom 5 · 0 0

Yep, she is probably going through a hard time but you don't want to be using you. She will get that message you left on her machine and i suppose if she wants to call you let her. I think its a bit heavy when youv'e just united and she 's calling on you to baby sit her kids and you dont really know them to well. and it also depend on how good of friends you were before and the reason for loosing contact. suppose what i would do in this situation is just wait until she calls you and sus out her motives. MOTIVES!!!!!

2006-09-08 01:07:46 · answer #3 · answered by jesus' princess 1 · 1 0

I think you should call her back in a few days. You have to understand that she thought of you to be there for her in her toughest time. And all that you can do is be the friend that you can be, a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen. You just have to understand that she is going through a tough time, and give her some time. Don't worry, I'm sure she didn't forget about ya ;)

2006-09-08 01:04:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

well
1 maybe she weoudnt recieve your call
2 maybe she found a new boyfriend
3 maybe because of he children she wount answer u
and .......
but never forget that you can always do things with speaking call her again but from public phone or.... that she coudnt see you number id call again a few days and speak with her very polite and friendly(kindly) and tell her that i called you and tell her if you want i can help u
one another thing that you can do is to buy sth for hewr or for her children as a gift and go to her house but dont enter just tell her i bought sth for kids and u if thereis sth that i can help u call meu can understand there that she want to contiiniu or not pm me if u have any question koorosh9000@yahoo

2006-09-08 01:17:22 · answer #5 · answered by koorosh9000 2 · 0 0

don't be so hard on her she's going through a tough time.

she probably told you lets hang out after speaking for a long time over the phone eh? that's usually the case with people who are going through a break up. they just need to talk.

2006-09-08 01:04:48 · answer #6 · answered by NONAME 3 · 1 0

trust me. when someone is going thru a separation, divorce or just plain trauma in their life - dependability on them is not there and deservedly so.
when going thru these rough times we lose focus and lose track of our daily plans.
you could help by trying one more time a little more aggressivley to make contact and explain you really want to help.
if you are ignored or pushed away - step back and be patient.
by trying one more time you make sure she is ok and not hurt or dead - god forbid. and at the same time you clear your conscious that at least you tried.

2006-09-08 01:03:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

I know how that feels, but don't give her a chance to complain about you. Try to call her one more time - if she doesn't answer, leave a voicemail. That way at least you'll know you made an effort.

2006-09-08 01:04:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Sounds like she needed a baby sitter for a night.

2006-09-08 01:00:22 · answer #9 · answered by Teacher 6 · 1 1

If you know her adress maybe you should write her a letter. Who knows maybe shes found herself a nice cabana boy and took off with him to hawii...lol ! Don't sweat it maybe she just needed to talk about it and is busy with other things and will get back to you later.

Good luck!

2006-09-08 01:08:04 · answer #10 · answered by Gigi 3 · 0 1

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