Does anyone know what i can do, we have grounded, taken everything away, even popped her on the butt. We are just at our ends with her. Does anyone have any suggestions on what could be causing this or what we could do about it?
2006-09-07 15:48:11 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
It sounds like her mother is not being consistent enough, and may be being too lenient out of guilt. Maybe she wants to be popular with her child. But since her child is a problem at your house, then maybe you need to draw some boundaries and not allow her to come over too often. If she and her mother live with you, then maybe she is confused about authority figures. Maybe she sees her mother answering to you, and she doesn't know how to act. Whatever the case, you have to have a plan with her mother. And you and her mother have to be consistent. That child needs to be able to predict, with 100% certainty, what the consequences will be for her misbehavior.
Kids are too little to make their own decisions. It sucks to be a kid sometimes. WHat else can they do but to try to control their parents or their family? They're like blind people, flailing their arms trying to find the walls. They test their boundaries. That's why you and her mother need to put your heads together and come up with a plan, and stick together on it. You would be doing a great disservice to this child to allow her behavior to continue. The real world will not accept that form her, when she gets out on her own. You have to teach her to swim before you throw her in the river, so to speak. If her mother is not down with this program, then don't allow her to come over (or live there). Whatever you do, don't spank or hit her. You will be teaching her how to manipulate you and how to make you lose your composure. You will also be teaching her that violence is ok. rememberm if you did that to another adult, you could go to jail....
It is possible that she may have been abused by someone (clergy, teacher, schoolmate, etc) and you don't know about it. Or maybe she is being bullied in school. It might not hurt to find out if she has been hurt or is experiencing something stressful. It might be a byproduct of her home life, if there is confusion with her father or mother's significant other. Kids act out because they do not have the language skills to be able to talk about it, or sometimes they feel responsible for it because they don't have anything else to compare to (how normal adults behave). Kids see adults as perfect and models for how to behave....
Frst find out the why, then the when, then come up with a plan, and if that doesn't work, make more boundaries. She might need counseling...
Good luck and Take care!
2006-09-07 16:12:10 · answer #1 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all is there any family problems when me and my oldest step sons father got together he tottaly disrespected me i tried everything punishing, spanking, grounding nothing seemed to work and we came to find out that b/c his biologicall mom kept walking in and out of his life he didnt feel the need to respect women if your granddaughter is craving attention this might be the root of all the problems try to take her for a one on one day where she feels special but during this day talk to her about the way she is acting and let her know that you love her more than anything and if she ever needs you to talk to she can just let her know that the way she has been acting is not going to be tolerated anymore if you need any more advice email me i have a 2, 4, 6, 7,and 9 yr old
2006-09-07 15:55:35 · answer #2 · answered by arkansasgirl02071981 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The most common disorder is ADHD. She is not satisfyied or stimulated by everyday things like most people, she gets bored easy doesn't she? She can't sit still listen or pay attention? Well if she has ADHD then she needs treatment for it. I have it and believe it or not me, a 23 year old woman have problems focusing and getting things done that I need to do. I haven't done laundry in a month! Well, hopefully it might be just a stage, but if you can't handle anymore, then you should take her to see a therapist or psychaitrist. Let them decide what to do.
2006-09-07 16:11:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I was growing up in the 1960's my younger sister had what seemed to be a so called "attitude problem". The eventual answer to her condition was that she was medically diagnosed as hyperactive. I'm not saying that is what is happening with your granddaughter but you have to look at all possibilities.
2006-09-07 16:00:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't pop her on her butt, kick her in it. I was a pretty rotten kid but I got pretty tired of having a sore rear end after a while. Just make sure there's nothing wrong with her mentally and make sure she has someone to talk to whenever necessary.
2006-09-07 17:30:05 · answer #5 · answered by Mil-CMR 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to speak gently with her, ask her what is really her problems, what she feels, she might have something hurt in her minds and heart and the more you popped her, the worse she will be, believe me.
2006-09-07 15:56:48 · answer #6 · answered by Sparkling pearl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nicely even as my daughter change into diognosed with ADHD we went to a counculer to ask for a drugs to furnish, and an fairly small volume about 10 millagrams (a million pill) we looked for a prior medicine no longer a clean one beacause who knows they'd have not examined it adequate, in the beginning i did not position self assurance in medicine yet after i change into confident to attempt it on my daughter she acted so strong she ought to concentration on her college paintings and her chores, and her additude more advantageous ALOT! now shes getting A's B's and one C in math (the concern she struggles on) seem into medicine, and strong success!
2016-10-15 23:30:02 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is trying her self to see if she can get away with it. take away what she loves most and stand firm. if you dont nip it in the bud at a early age you got big troubles when she reaches teenage years. spoken from personal exp. good luck.
2006-09-07 15:52:35 · answer #8 · answered by mike.shirley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my mom used to pop me on the mouth everytime i talked back not too hard just enough were her lips are numbish
2006-09-07 15:56:10 · answer #9 · answered by jettalady 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough love, stay strong, be firm.
2006-09-07 15:53:54 · answer #10 · answered by Smitty 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋