How do I get my three year old to listen at school?

Question

HELP! My three year old is at risk for getting kicked out of preschool. I don't know why she is having such a problem. I think that she is a normal three year old girl. Sometimes I have to get firm with her to listen, but she is by no means a problem child. She just started preschool and the teacher says that she will not listen to her at all, and will not follow direction. She has one more week to get her act together, or she will be asked not to return. My daughter was so excited about starting school. It's all she could talk about. I don't know what the problem is. She attends Sunday school every week and doesn't have a problem there, but there are more kids in her preschool class and it's for a longer time period. HELP!

Answer 1

First of all, I'd see about finding her a different school. That's no way to treat a 3 year old. The point of pre-school is for them to learn to listen and participate in groups. If her teacher can't teach... what's she doing there? Secondly, you might want to have her hearing tested. One of my children had problems "paying attention" in pre-school and it turned out she was hearing impaired and that was a huge part of the problem. Good luck and give the little one a hug. That's a whole lotta pressure for a toddler !

Answer 2

I would find out how the teacher is speaking to your daughter. The teacher could be "mean sounding" and no child is going to respect that type of tone, would you? Can you look for another school? Your daughter just simply may not be happy there and she is away from you all day and this may be causing her some anxiety too. You know, some kids don't fit in some programs. It just happens. Look for some others in your area. Get her out of there if the school has no patience for a three year old whom you would think they have the skill to deal with children this age, I mean it is a preschool, hello. This says a whole lot to me about the teachers there (and not very good things I might add). I would be suspicious and I would get that child out now!

Answer 3

All I have to say is that if a teacher cannot give YOU any guidance to what is going on...then find another school. Your child and that school might not be a good match. Go observe her class if you can. Last year, my daughter was just a NEW 3--due to later birthday. I think she had more trouble than other kids adjusting. She was not getting in trouble or anything. BUT---she was not really socializing or wanting to participate at times and in a way--not listening. She is really shy and slow to warm up. I asked the teachers how she was doing, they said fine....keep bringing her. Five weeks go by, and my daughter was still not happy to go to school. Then I peeked in one class, after I just told the teacher that my daughter was not feeling well. The teacher grabbed her hand and "pulled" her along as she ran the class. But, not mingling with her. I kept peeking in, and I just was getting more upset and not sure what to do. This was my first experience with preschool....and to be honest, not sure what to expect. And my daughter was visibly upset. And after awhile, she was standing in the middle of the room, alone. I totally understand the whole not forcing issue...but I peeked in again every 7-8 mins or so, and she stood there for about 20 mins. I wasn't sure what to do, and I was about to knock ont he door (they lock the doors) and peeked again...then she sat at the arts table. So, I thought she was finally participating. Also, I could HEAR everything that was going on. I did not hear them call my daughter's name once, to get her to participate...include her...etc. Anyway, 45 mins into this class--the door opened so they can move to another room, my daughter was crying. I got up and said, "I'm taking her home!" The teacher said "she must be sick (duh), she didn't even do an art project" So, we never went back, and she was sick. Maybe my daughter was a bit on the young side, but I feel strongly that TEACHERS should be able to deal with these situations and be warm and nurturing. And understand children...and their personalities. Slow to warm up, outgoing...etc. And understand that 3 and 4 yo don't always listen. The next day---I found out from a friend of mine who was room mom for the day, the day before, told me she got scolded for going to my daughter when my daughter was a little upset. I did call the director and complain.

Now, your daughter---how horrible is it that she's not listening? Is she disrupting the class? Or being a typical 3 yr old? I mean, she isn't biting, hitting or anything....right? And it's PRESCHOOL. They are 3, they don't listen. They don't stand in line perfectly. But they are there to LEARN. How much stress do you want to give your daughter? And what 3 yr old gets their ACT TOGETHER in a week!?!?! And school just started....maybe she needs more time. My daughter started school again this year--she's 4 now. And is doing wonderfully. The teacher said she is still slow to warm up....and sometimes doesn't want to sit...and they are working on it. And she seems to be over the overwhelming part of school and doing much better. The teachers gave me feedback right away. Paired her up with a buddy. And give hugs when needed. Talk to the teacher, ask for advice....and I strongly suggest that you go observe her class. And be the judge on how problematic it is. It might be an eye opener! Otherwise, search for a more suitable match in a school.

Answer 4

You know, these nursery schools are just driving me nuts. My daughter starts on Monday and the things she has to know how to do already is just crazy. My attitude is that's why we send our children to nursery school, so they can learn the basics, one of which is following directions.

Can you talk to the teacher and/or the director and ask for suggestions on how to get her to follow directions because you are at a loss. Tell them you want to make this work, but she doesn't have a problem at Sunday school so you need their help. It's not right that your daughter has a week to get it straight or she'll be kicked out - she's three.

Answer 5

Three year olds are still learning to learn how to listen. You have either a bad teacher that is rigid or her school itself is not good.
Get her out of there and find some other place for her.
She also may only be ready for a couple of hours but not a full day, This could be something to think about. Shes just three and thats young.

Answer 6

Maybe she is not ready for preschool. Usually kids start preschool around at 4 years old. Put her in a smaller environment. Maybe there are too many kids in her class and that gets her distracted.

Answer 7

shes THREE YEARS OLD!! WHY DO PEOPLE PUT THEIR KIDS IN SCHOOL SO EARLY? She starts kindergarten when she is 5...cant it wait till the next year? a 3 year old cant understand the importance of following the directions of someone she doesnt know...she listens to mommy and daddy...and shes not supposed to talk to strangers, right?

Answer 8

i hate to make you give in to her, but I'm guessing the best idea, is bribing, a barbie, or something else that interests her, every week tell her if she can get through with out getting in trouble you have a SURPRISE< and don't be afraid to punish, if she's old enough to not listen, she's old enough to be grounded

Answer 9

SHE IS THREE!!! She is not going to be able to listen and fully comprehend direction. Maybe the other kids are medicated! SHE IS THREE!!!

Answer 10

maybe you can play school with her, seeing how she listens to you, ..perhaps its the teacher or enviroment..Change preschools