My Husband died unexpectily on labor day in his sleep.he was 38 .he left behind 4 kids.how do we cope with this?our 1 n 1/2 year keeps knockin on doors hopin hell pop out.she crys all the time.
2006-09-07 11:27:12 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
all i do is cry and stare at the wall.i cant believ im even on the cpu.i feel so guilty.the kids think im crazy.i cant stop thinkin about the way i found him and and i cant stop thinkin about him in general.i would give any think just to touch him and hear his vioce again.
2006-09-07 11:36:55 · update #1
Thats so sad, You need help with some support groups, explain to the kids what really happened. Kids are small adults , they'll understand. But get help whatever you do.
Im really sorry
2006-09-07 11:31:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Within each passing day the pain and loss will lessen it is hard for you to realize now but time has a way to heal. You will never forget the person you lost because they will always remain in your heart. It is a reminder to us all when we lose someone, especially so young that life is so precious and so short. As for the children they are very young and don't understand but you will need to be strong and sit the children down and try to explain that their daddy is not coming home and that he is in a better place. As the children get older always remind them of the good memories of their dad because they will have questions as they mature.
I talk from experience because I have lost two special people in my life at an early age. In the beginning you feel as though you can not get through this grief and pain but you will it just takes time. Allow yourself to grieve because it is so important to do so and take all of the time you need if you don't you will always carry the pain and anger with you.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
2006-09-07 19:05:19 · answer #2 · answered by asia s 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, I've been there, and there's no easy answer. There's not much you can do about it. It's like being stabbed with a knife that doesn't kill you. Eventually, the wound heals, but it takes a very long time, and it leaves a nasty scar forever. You just have to wait out the pain and hang in there until time can do its thing. It does slowly get better. But it takes years...
2006-09-07 18:31:55 · answer #3 · answered by george 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry for your loss. I found these steps online. I hope that you will apply some of them to help you cope with your grief.
Give yourself permission to feel the pain and loss.
Be patient with the process and don't pressure yourself with expectations.
Accept that you need to experience your pain, your emotions, your own way of healing, and in your own time. Don’t judge your emotions or compare yourself to others.
Express your feelings. Let yourself cry. Both are necessary for healing.
Get support. Talk about your loss, your memories, and your experience of the life and death of your loved one. Do not protect your family and friends by not expressing your sadness. Ask others for what you need. Find and talk to others who have lost a loved one.
Try to maintain your normal lifestyle. Avoid major life changes (for example, moving, changing jobs, altering important relationships) within the first year of bereavement. This will allow you to maintain roots and some sense of security.
Take care of yourself: eat well and exercise. Physical activity is a good way to release tension. Allow yourself small physical pleasures that help you replenish yourself like hot baths, naps, and favorite foods.
Avoid excessive alcohol, which can harm your body as well as dulling emotions. It is likely to slow your recovery and may cause new problems.
Forgive yourself for all the things you said or didn't say or do. Compassion and forgiveness for yourself and others is important in healing.
Give yourself a break from grief. Although it is necessary to work through grief, you do not need to constantly focus on it. It is healthy to find appropriate distractions like going to a movie, dinner, or a ball game, reading a good book, listening to music, getting a massage or manicure.
Prepare for holidays and anniversaries. Decide if you want to continue certain traditions or create new ones. Plan in advance how you want to spend your time and with whom. Do something symbolic in memory of your loved one.
Join a bereavement support group. Others can give encouragement, information, guidance, comfort, practical suggestions, and can help you feel less alone.
I think the last suggestion is the most important one. Join a support group. I think it would help you to gain the support of others who have experienced a loss. Trust in God and he will help you through this very painful time in your life.
2006-09-07 18:37:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh man. what can you tell a young child about that type of situation without harming them mentally and emotionally?! i wouldnt know what to say.
the best thing to do to cope with this situation is make your kids understand what happend.
tell them that daddy is in Heaven and he is in a better place now where its safer and waiting for us all.
if they say they want to go up there too.
tell them that its not their time. when the time comes then we will all go up at the same time and meet daddy. but we cant chose that day. that day comes when it wants too.
try not to forget him. i know its hard becus he is gone and you might think that its best to forget him so that you dont cry as much. but you need to understand that it was his time to go.
if you are having trouble coping, go to friends and family. or a thereapist.
2006-09-07 18:32:55 · answer #5 · answered by All4Christ 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I am so sorry you are going through this. You are in my prayers. Just pray to God and ask him to help you be strong and be strong for your children. He puts no more on you than you can bear. You have my sympathy. It's hard losing a loved one.
2006-09-07 18:36:32 · answer #6 · answered by tantalizin1 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wish there was something I could say to comfort you... I wish you the very best.. Try to be strong and surround yourself with those who love you... I hope you can find peace.
5Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. 6In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
2006-09-07 18:31:39 · answer #7 · answered by Heatmizer 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am soooo sorry. I hope time will heal your heart. I also hope that your family is near by to console you and help you. If you need to talk please feel free to Email me.
2006-09-07 18:30:23 · answer #8 · answered by goodbye 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
really miserable to cope such situation. however, i console you. feel about your children and their future.
2006-09-07 18:31:24 · answer #9 · answered by prince47 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋