Tell me a story!?

Question

Trying to stay awake at work... help!
Thanks, people. =D

Answer 1

Number 4

A man bumps into a woman in a hotel lobby and as he does, his elbow
goes
into her breast. They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and
says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll
forgive
me."

She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 221."



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Number 3

One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts rubbing
his
wife's arm. The wife turns over and says, "I'm sorry honey, I've got a
gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh."

The husband, rejected, turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls
back over and taps his wife again. "Do you have a dentist appointment
tomorrow too?"


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_________


Number 2

Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed there for a
number of
years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a
terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle
slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk
about
it, but Bill said he would be too embarrassed He vowed to overcome
the compulsion on his own.

One day a few weeks later, Bill came home and his wife could see at
once that something was seriously wrong.

"What's wrong, Bill?" she asked.

"Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to
put my penis into the pickle slicer?"

"Oh, Bill, you didn't!" she exclaimed.

"Yes, I did." he replied.

"My God, Bill, what happened?"

"I got fired."

"No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?"

"Oh...she got fired too."


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Number 1

A couple had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the
breakfast table one morning when the wife says, "Just think, fifty
years ago
we were sitting here at this breakfast table together."

"I know," the old man said. "We were probably sitting here naked as
a jaybird fifty years ago."

"Well," Granny snickered. "Let's relive some old times."

Where upon, the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table.

"You know, honey," the little old lady breathlessly replied, "My
nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago."

"I wouldn't be surprised," replied Gramps. "One's in your coffee
and the other is in your oatmeal."

Answer 2

Once there was a girl so bored, she'd do anything,
at present all she was doing was staring at her screen.

Help, she said, i'm going out of my head,
wishing she could go home and go to bed.

So she got on the internet, desperate you see for some company,
and all she got was nuts like me, cause i bet she's still sleepy
after listening to me!

Answer 3

girl likes boy... boy gets girl's number.... boy, girl hook up, spend lots of time together, become inseparable, love each other to death, girls parents get scare about their relationship because they see them very involved. Girl's parents decide to move to another country to separate girl from boy. Boy and girl are very sad, I mean very, very, very sad. Girl moves to the other country, parents are happy, girl is super sad, Boy is extremely sad. Boy flies to the other country to met with her, and yes, yes!!.... they run away... away away to be together. Were they able to stay together?

If you want to find out more.... of course because you are still bored.... email me ;)