I really really want to be with someone, but I am very insecure in dating/intimate relationships. So I do without and watch everyone else have fun. I'm 39 years old and get so depressed, especially when you see youngsters dating. Plus I want to be with someone I'm attracted to. any ideas?
2006-09-07 08:42:19 · 18 answers · asked by m6bonster 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Go to Al-Anon meetings, please. You are right to be wary of just jumping into relationships - I too, am the child of an alcoholic father & be damned if I didn't go marry a man who was just like "dear old dad". We tend to repeat history if we don't understand it. Find some support - anywhere!! - get counseling. Then dip your toe in the water & find love - you deserve it, you are worthy of happiness, you matter. Good luck - remember, you have to make your own happiness - nobody is going to hand it to you on a silver platter!!!!
2006-09-07 08:48:12 · answer #1 · answered by pumpkin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
grownup babies of Addicts many times have problems in arising and preserving intimate relationships, because of the fact of many components. in the alcoholic kinfolk this is far less stressful to lie then tell the actuality and get overwhelmed. many times the alcoholic's thoughts waivers between being an entire jerk and a depressive. Being in the midst of that emotional turmoil defines the character of the ACA. many times "arising crises" are techniques ACA's make the worldwide greater healthful for them. with the intention to interrupt the conduct and types you should be made attentive to them and artwork on changing them. additionally an ACA might in actuality go through to a pair degree a concern wide-unfold as submit irritating rigidity. PTS can carry back techniques of incidents that got here approximately even an prolonged time in the past as though the memory became into the day beforehand of this. look for Counseling, discover the community Alanon kinfolk team on your section. i've got faith Alanon is larger for ACA then the ACA application it is self. i've got attended ACA and it many times wound up being a blaming consultation. the factor is to get out of the blaming habit and get on with life ain't it?
2016-10-14 10:31:08 · answer #2 · answered by shea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Al Anon is not only for alcoholics but for family and friends of alcoholics. There are many groups out there, so sit in in a few meetings. Don't give up, it took me three weeks of checking out groups to find the right one for me. My father is an alcoholic.
2006-09-07 08:48:16 · answer #3 · answered by luna94_2000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My father is an alcoholic...try ACOA (adult children of alcholics) Al-Anon, Nar-Anon. I was the same way but what worked for me was working on myself and my issues...now my father and I have a great relationship, and I have a really wonderful man in my life. But it didnt just happen, I had to do A LOT of work on myself to get there. Good luck!!!
2006-09-07 08:48:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
is your alcoholic parent keeping you trapped in the house? why can't you go out and meet some people that you may interest & that interest you! someone needs as AA meeting and you could use a support group for friends and family of alcoholics. maybe you should probably have a drink yourself you sound tense!
2006-09-07 08:48:18 · answer #5 · answered by BREIZY2SHA 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to go to an AA support group, for children of alcoholics. if not go to counseling, you need to do this for your self, so you can start to live. At the support groups you will meet people in the same position as you. and you will meet friends. Just get yourself together, and read books on self esteem.
2006-09-07 08:55:16 · answer #6 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont feel depressed. Dont let yourself to be lonely. Get yourself occupied in some sort of activities. It might be anything from stiching cooking gardening to dancing. Meet lots of people. Make lots of friends. Infact this will help u find that special someone to whom u might get attracted to!!
2006-09-07 08:56:32 · answer #7 · answered by winterblossom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alanon is a very good support group, try that. And know that only YOU are responsible for your own happiness. So live it up!!! Get out and have a good time (without the alcohol of course).
GOOD LUCK!
2006-09-07 08:46:38 · answer #8 · answered by Heather 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am also and adult child of an alcoholic parent but it doesn't effect my relationships unless they start drinking I don't want them to drink. So you should try to figure out why you are scared. and work on it.
2006-09-07 08:49:58 · answer #9 · answered by Rachel Bitchface 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start out easy. Go to places where you have to talk to people. Mingle. One way to get the ball rolling. Take a dog for a walk or go to a park. People will talk to you, guys to.
2006-09-07 08:45:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋