This has broken my heart!! Why would he stay with me for so long? Why did he think I would never know? Will he ever go back to being heterosexual? - Thanks
2006-09-07 07:27:17 · 35 answers · asked by want2no 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Keep it movin
find a new boyfriend!
2006-09-07 07:32:31 · answer #1 · answered by Di 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you asked this same question in the category for gays and lesbians, I think you might get some very thoughtful answers that would really help explain his behavior to you. It may be that he was so focused on his inward turmoil that he wasn't capable of putting your feelings first and realizing what it would do to you when he came out. It may be that he never, ever intended to come out but eventually the struggle just ended that way. As to whether he will "go back," I don't think that happens, but sometimes people do decide they must be bisexual. To answer your question about what to do, I would say, if you are a very strong person and can handle it and if you ever had true feelings for him, the best thing you can do right now is be willing to let him go from boyfriend to boy friend. He can use all the acceptance and understanding and support he can get right now.
2006-09-07 07:34:38 · answer #2 · answered by Rvn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should be happy for him. I know it sounds strange but it is not a choice. He was never "heterosexual" he was just pretending to be. It must have been very hard for him to admit it he obviously tried to hide from it by staying with you. He will be happier now that he is accepting what he really is. If you truly love him you will help him through this hard time and continue to be his friend. Don't hang around hoping he will come back to you though it won't happen. You need to move forward in your life too....
2006-09-07 07:31:43 · answer #3 · answered by Nicolleta 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did he just find out? That may have happened...so many guys just don't have a clue as to what normal feelings are...no one will discuss them with the guy..so go a littel easy on him. IF on the other hand, he has been carrying on behind your back, that is another story! In any event, it is over, pick up your sticks and go find another love..they are waiting for you with open arms. You did not make this guy Gay, no one can do that but genetics, and all that happened long before he was born. Love is waiting for you..just take your time to find it.
2006-09-07 07:31:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Man that's hard but you have to think how hard it must be on him. I know you must feel like s**t but wouldn't it be cool to have a gay guy friend that already knows you and how you are. For the reason he didn't tell you and also stayed with you for 3 yrs, it might be that he really cares for you. If someone is gay they can' t help it it's who they are. All I can say is for you to think how he is feeling and maybe try to help him in some way.
2006-09-07 07:41:45 · answer #5 · answered by heygirl0222 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he was in denial. Maybe he was hoping the feelings would go away. Maybe he wants to experiment. He probably didn't mean to hurt you, but he couldn't deny his true feelings anymore. You can't change a person, they have to want to change on their own. Who knows what the future holds? However, if you still care deeply for this person, be there as a friend? Stand by their side. It might be hard at first, but that's life. Stuff happens...
2006-09-07 07:32:30 · answer #6 · answered by L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say the best thing to do is talk to him, find out why he didn't tell you to begin with.. then decide where or not you want him in your life.... you have to remember that it is very hard a homosexual to come out even though it's more expected in society doesn't mean he can't feel stressed about how his loved ones are going to feel and how are they going to react.
2006-09-07 07:40:06 · answer #7 · answered by yelenia0 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a big plus for you.For him to think you didn't know made him able to see which way he could act.When was the first odd or different action that made you say Whats up with that extra look you gave that guy?How was your sex thing with him?
2006-09-07 07:46:27 · answer #8 · answered by Sideny J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't dispair sweetie. He's going through a lot right now, and it's probably been hard for him to admit.
I have had this happen to me, and you know what I thought.....
"Hey, at least he didn't leave me for another gir! I can't compete with a man."
Be his friend right now, he needs all the support he can get right now!
2006-09-07 07:31:44 · answer #9 · answered by Chellebelle78 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he's still attracted to you, he's not gay he's bi... and he should have told you.
Talk to him and see what his feelings are. As long as you set some ground rules, this doesn't have to end up being a breakup unless you really can't deal with it.
2006-09-07 07:31:47 · answer #10 · answered by Avid 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you were a couple for 3 years and you didn't know... well
1) he's not but it's an excuse to break up with you
2) you haven't shown him the greatness of a real woman
3) he's a twit... move on
2006-09-07 07:37:06 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋