Please Help if you can.?

Question

I feel really lonely. I attend a prominent medical school. I want to have a girlfriend. Yes I might be shy, but the girls I've asked eithet told me thay they are seeing someone or decline the approach after originally agreeing to go out on a date. I am not ugly. Yes my field requires alot of time committment. I have come to a point in my life that I really would need a companion. What should I do? If you want to help, please give your input. If not please completely disregard my email. Thanks.

Answer 1

I am sorry for you. I too had such a situation, but you'll have to cope up. Loneliness is very bad, it makes one to feel worse, having none to talk to, having none to share feelings with.

It's all right. I know it's really hard, but seen as how you are capable of expressing your feelings, you'll surely get someone who's really worthy of you. It might take sometime but it will surely happen eventually.

Good luck buddy .

Answer 2

Let's start at the beginning. You want to date because you feel really lonely. This could probably be your worst reason to want to date someone. Yes, when you're dating you have the benefit to having someone around, but in essence you're using them like a pet or the TV. If you're in an moving community like medical school, you're almost never really alone. So the loneliness is more your lack of attachment and your sadness about it. I'm sure the people you're approaching can sence this on some level.

The easiest way to get to dating is just to be happy where you are. Meaning if you're going for Chinese you're happy while you wait for your order. If by chance you meet someone while you're there that you find interesting, don't try to show it and don't be afraid to develop your interest.

You have to understand that just becasue people talk to you may not mean that they are interested in you. They could be just be looking for having a good time. Most people are, actually everyone is on some level.

Unfortunately your situation puts you at a disadvantage because the beginning of relationships are expected to take up a lot of time. Mainly because in the beginning you're directing yourself towards proving your position, working out what you want. If you can't devote what is being asked, your best bet is looking for companionship in other ways. Starting with knowing yourself and you could always get a small pet.

Now with relationships there is the added and now expected bonus of sex. But you know how things will end up if your get involved with someone just for sex. And if you're using people for sex, it probably isn't really good sex anyway. Why waste your time on bad sex?

My advice to you is to ride out the storm. Since what you really want is a nurturing committed ingaged situation, just setteling for whatever cheese crosses your pass will only frustrate you more. As I said earlier, you're not really alone, enjoy the company you do have the best your can. Everything else you can handle on your own, for you...

Answer 3

THis happened to me and I never married and am still bitter and hurt and guys always hit on me but they want one thing and it is not a relationship.
Do not settle. Do not spend too much time on a person even if you really like them ,do not waste time on anyone who is not interested in a long term relationship or marriage.
Despite what they say...watch their actions...I am sorry... You just keep trying...do not give up. I chose school and am not married....I see now in retrospect that I passed up oppertunities when I dated a person for too long expecting something else and I did not do things to meet people like taking up a hobby etc. Good luck,.

Answer 4

try becoming friends w/a women first. the best relationships I've had develop over time. i know you are busy,but what good is life if you have no one to share it with? I'm sure you know better than i do that things you want to accomplish take work. it doesn't help sitting around feeling sorry for yourself. if you want a relationship,make a decision to really work at it,put in the time. its like a fat girl complaining but not wiling to exercise.

Answer 5

the field you are in requires alot of your time. some people probably think that the schooling will take their place in a relationship. when the time is right, it will be right. in the mean time, why don't you try an online dating service....i know some people that have had alot of good things come out of them. my sister-in-law married the guy she met. it's a start!!

Answer 6

Try a local singles phone line in your area, you'd be surprised how many interesting people you'd meet. Also, online singles services are good, especially one's with pictures. Also, try meeting people outside of the usual comfort-zone type places. Try libraries, book stores, grocery stores, laundry mats, etc. Good luck!

Answer 7

get out there in the real world and socialize.

(P.S. Your Q. here is not an Email, If It Is Copied And Pasted Here, Your Question Can Get Deleted As "Spam".)

Answer 8

If you aren't finding someone in the places you are looking, try other places. And by all means have a sense of humor, funny guys are the bomb no matter what...

Answer 9

you have to increase your stock value my friend. understand that when you are looking and desiring, you may come off a little desperate. so, understand that you are a valuble commodity. a man who isn't ugly workingon a solid career. I would say, relax and take some of the pressure off of yourself to find a mate and see that others (ladies) want to get to know you. just don't come off desperate, it will turn around. and your stock value will increase. trust me on this one.

Answer 10

Hey, hang in there and keep putting yourself out there. You're bound to be accepted by one of them. Don't give up hope. Good luck.